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-->709 Brown is a famed suite located within the
Brown Residence Hall of the Sylvan Living Area, at the
University of
Massachusetts, Amherst. This living area, once
known as a haven for outcasts and people with mental handicap
housing exemptions, has become a hub of social activity at UMASS as
a direct result of the members of this suite.
709 Brown
History
The Inception of 709
709, as a suite in Brown, is a rather nondescript
suite.It is composed to two single
rooms, two double occupancies, a common living area, and a
bathroom.However, it is odd in that it
is the smallest suite, in terms of square footage, in all of
Sylvan.This is because of Brown
Dormitory's "backwards" construction and it's proximity to the
roof.The suite's disgusting, slime
covered and smelly rug is a testament to the backward and
ineffective maintenance measures taken by the University over the
course of the 20 years Sylvan has been in existence.
709 Brown
offers a prime view of the east end of campus.It overlooks the field hockey and baseball field, and
further out various of the Berkshire Mountains.It is a prime viewing spot for sunsets throughout the
entire year, as none of the trees located on the hill that frames
Sylvan block any of the windows located in 709.
Suite 709 is one
of several locations marked as a stop-over in the UMASS Ghost
Tour.It is purportedly inhabited by a
ghost named "Chalmers".He is rumored to
cause drastic temperature fluctuation, open and close the bathroom
door, and flicker the bathroom lights at 5 am every Thursday
morning.
These purely physical descriptions of 709 may cause
skeptics to question this articles' legitimacy.However, the suite serves as a physical manifestation
of the possibility of collective change.Its members and social events have been the subject of
numerous cartoon strips in the Daily Collegian over the course of
the last 5 years.
The emergence of the social group known as 709
began in the fall of 2001.Once a
nondescript suite in an average dormitory in the least popular of
living areas at UMASS - Amherst, 709 has seen revolutionary change
in the last six years.
The addition was a cast of characters
who, through a slow, deliberate, and thought-out process have
brought political change to the student government and a
significant change in the character of the living area.
The
Sylvan Living Area's Population largely consists of people who
chose to live in another area of campus and who were denied this
opportunity as a result of University Protocol and Housing
Limitations.709's population on a yearly
basis follows similar trends, though its' members are increasingly
willing to move into the suite as its' notoriety has grown.
The 709 Comics
I am currently in the process of getting
access to the paper morge for the Umass Daily Collegian in order to
get copies of comic strip based upon the people and events of
709.
Social Events
= The Pool Party
=
The Infamous Letter
The Pool Party
On September 17th, 2005, 709 decided to host a tropical pool
party in the common room of the suite. Tarps were first
layed down covering the extent of the room, and then a large
inflatable pool was set up.In order to
fill the pool with water, a garden hose was run from a faucet in
the bathroom to the pool in the common room.The party was dispersed around midnight by several RA's
who also ordered the removal of the tarps and the pool from the
common room.Before leaving, the RA's
called maintenance to come look at possible damage to the
suite.Around 3 AM, maintenence personel
arrived to estimate any damage done.Upon
seeing the water soaked entryway, the maintainer said, "It'll dry"
and left.On Septemeber 29th, the letter
one can see to the left was recieved by two suitemates of
709.The letter, along with giving a
detailed description of the party and various charges, stated that
the two suitemates would be put on "interim
suspension".A term meaning they would be
removed from campus and have all the credits from that semester
voided.The two suitemates are in the
process of fighting these charges.
Famous
Deeds
= The Great Skyscraper Climb 2001
=
= Snowball Fight 2004 =
Snowball Fight 2004
is known and remembered by many students, present and former, who
attended UMASS Amherst and lived in the Sylvan and Northeast Living
Areas.
On the evening of December
16th, 2004, a spontaneous event of riotous proporitons erupted in
the common area of the three Sylvan buildings.Urged by a speech given by various members of suite 709
Brown, several hundred revelers and would be rioters congregated
and began what would be known as the largest on-campus snowball
fight in the history of the University.
Led by a trio of 709ers, the mob attacked smokers
outside various dormitories in Sylvan.They pelted innocent bystanders, the sides of
buildings, and cars.The mob then
proceeded down North Pleasant Street in Amherst, with many members
of the group sliding down the unplowed street.Their destination was the Northeast Living
Area.
This impromptu army assaulted
an ongoing snow football game with such ferocity and violence that
every member of the Northeast Tag Football Team retreated to their
dorms, at which point the mob slowly dispersed.
The reasons for the event's demise is largely
blamed on the permanent damage inflicted on one of the
leaders.A hand, broken in two places,
with a ruptured tendon, caused this man to retreat to Health
Services with another 709er, and this loss of centralized
leadership ultimately dispersed the mob.
= Sylvan Concert
2004 =
Members of 709 Brown were eventually elected as
representative leaders in the Area Government of
Sylvan.These members included Ryan
"8ball" Murray and Matthew "Handles" Handler, as Secretary and
Lieutenant Governor respectively.The
Governor, Matthew "Uncle" Ruggiero, was a close friend of the suite
in question and thus was considered, for all intents and purposes,
to be a live-in member of the suite.
These gentlemen made it
their ultimate goal to organize, manage, and direct the largest
end-of-school event the living area in question had ever
seen.Over the course of 8 months they
organized a 7-band concert, including groups from as far away as
Hartford, CT.The musical ensembles
ranged from free-form improvisational jazz to the hip-hop of
underground legend Brownsound.
The
concert drew a large number of residents, with an approximation of
1500 people over the course of the 10 hour day.Food was served in abundance, various carnival events
such as bouncy houses were strategically placed along the trod, and
a good time was had by all.