His life

Aaron Jeffery Zabriskieis a typical kid who isn't the brightest bulb in the box. He was accidentally concieved one summer night after his parents(Jeffery and Gay Zabriskie) decided to "play around" in a Las Vegas bar's bathroom stall. He is alive today thanks to his mother who reluctantly cared for her 32.7 pound newborn son. all through his early years, he was exposed to many strange things from male nudists giving eachother blowjobs to his parents having sex, from molestation to an incestuous relatonship with his mother that created his new baby brother. Currently, he is going toAACS(to find out more about the school, visit the website at [1728]) and is struggling in his love life. As he presses on to try to win the affection of a cowboy wannabe named Maddie, he sacrafices dead babies with AIDS on a pure gold alter devoted soully to her. If he can't get her, he says that Hillary Clinton is the second hottest woman in his world. Academically, he is failing the school's lowest math class(Algebra 1a), History, Spanish 1, Environmental Science, and Study Hall. In his spare time, he reads Anne of Green Gables, Little Women, and Shakespeare. You can also find him busy memorizing long love poems, dictionaries, Thesauruses, and Classic Greek Litterature.

<s>His dreams</s>

Aaron hopes to win either Maddie's or Hillary Clinton's affection and go on to have twenty kids(all girls). As a dad, he would like to pursue a career of prostitution or child day care. If none of his dreams come true, he could be a fat, tv stereotype dad and watch sports and Nascar all day while the wife works for a living.

In the End

Aaron will probably end up like those losers who waste hours getting fat playing world of warcraft and dungeons and dragons while living off of their mother's wellfare money. In this poor soul's case, all we can do is pray and say "ernt. All your dreams are dead."
00:48, 6 June 2007 (UTC)