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Facsimile of the first page of
All's Well that Ends Well
from the
First
Folio, published in 1623.
DRAMATIS PERSONAE (Persons Represented):
- KING OF FRANCE.
- THE DUKE OF FLORENCE.
- BERTRAM, Count of Rousillon.
- LAFEU, an old Lord.
- PAROLLES, a follower of Bertram.
- Several young French Lords, that serve with Bertram in the
Florentine War.
- Steward, Servant to the Countess of Rousillon.
- Clown, Servant to the Countess of Rousillon.
- A Page, Servant to the Countess of Rousillon.
- COUNTESS OF ROUSILLON, Mother to Bertram.
- HELENA, a Gentlewoman protected by the Countess.
- An old Widow of Florence.
- DIANA, daughter to the Widow.
- VIOLENTA, neighbour and friend to the Widow.
- MARIANA, neighbour and friend to the Widow.
- Lords attending on the KING; Officers; Soldiers, &c.,
French and Florentine.
SCENE: Partly in France, and partly in Tuscany.
ACT I.
SCENE
1. Rousillon. A room in the COUNTESS'S palace.
[Enter BERTRAM, the COUNTESS OF ROUSILLON, HELENA, and LAFEU,
all in black.]
COUNTESS.
- In delivering my son from me, I bury a second husband.
BERTRAM.
- And I in going, madam, weep o'er my father's death anew;
- but I must attend his majesty's command, to whom I am now
in
- ward, evermore in subjection.
LAFEU.
- You shall find of the king a husband, madam;—you, sir, a
father:
- he that so generally is at all times good, must of necessity
hold
- his virtue to you; whose worthiness would stir it up where
it
- wanted, rather than lack it where there is such abundance.
COUNTESS.
- What hope is there of his majesty's amendment?
LAFEU.
- He hath abandoned his physicians, madam; under whose practices
he
- hath persecuted time with hope; and finds no other advantage
in
- the process but only the losing of hope by time.
COUNTESS.
- This young gentlewoman had a father—O, that 'had!' how
- sad a passage 'tis!—whose skill was almost as great as his
- honesty; had it stretched so far, would have made nature
- immortal, and death should have play for lack of work. Would,
for
- the king's sake, he were living! I think it would be the death
of
- the king's disease.
LAFEU.
- How called you the man you speak of, madam?
COUNTESS.
- He was famous, sir, in his profession, and it was his great
right
- to be so—Gerard de Narbon.
LAFEU.
- He was excellent indeed, madam; the king very lately spoke
- of him admiringly and mourningly; he was skilful enough to
have
- liv'd still, if knowledge could be set up against
mortality.
BERTRAM.
- What is it, my good lord, the king languishes of?
LAFEU.
- A fistula, my lord.
BERTRAM.
- I heard not of it before.
LAFEU.
- I would it were not notorious.—Was this gentlewoman the
- daughter of Gerard de Narbon?
COUNTESS.
- His sole child, my lord, and bequeathed to my overlooking. I
have
- those hopes of her good that her education promises; her
- dispositions she inherits, which makes fair gifts fairer;
for
- where an unclean mind carries virtuous qualities, there
- commendations go with pity,—they are virtues and traitors
too:
- in her they are the better for their simpleness; she derives
her
- honesty, and achieves her goodness.
LAFEU.
- Your commendations, madam, get from her tears.
COUNTESS.
- 'Tis the best brine a maiden can season her praise in. The
- remembrance of her father never approaches her heart but
the
- tyranny of her sorrows takes all livelihood from her cheek.
No
- more of this, Helena,—go to, no more, lest it be rather
thought
- you affect a sorrow than to have.
HELENA.
- I do affect a sorrow indeed; but I have it too.
LAFEU.
- Moderate lamentation is the right of the dead; excessive
grief
- the enemy to the living.
COUNTESS.
- If the living be enemy to the grief, the excess makes it
soon
- mortal.
BERTRAM.
- Madam, I desire your holy wishes.
LAFEU.
- How understand we that?
COUNTESS.
- Be thou blest, Bertram, and succeed thy father
- In manners, as in shape! thy blood and virtue
- Contend for empire in thee, and thy goodness
- Share with thy birthright! Love all, trust a few,
- Do wrong to none: be able for thine enemy
- Rather in power than use; and keep thy friend
- Under thy own life's key: be check'd for silence,
- But never tax'd for speech. What heaven more will,
- That thee may furnish and my prayers pluck down,
- Fall on thy head! Farewell.—My lord,
- 'Tis an unseason'd courtier; good my lord,
- Advise him.
LAFEU.
- He cannot want the best
- That shall attend his love.
COUNTESS.
- Heaven bless him!—Farewell, Bertram.
[Exit COUNTESS.]
BERTRAM.
- The best wishes that can be forg'd in your thoughts [To
HELENA.]
- be servants to you! Be comfortable to my mother, your
mistress,
- and make much of her.
LAFEU.
- Farewell, pretty lady: you must hold the credit of your
father.
[Exeunt BERTRAM and LAFEU.]
HELENA.
- O, were that all!—I think not on my father;
- And these great tears grace his remembrance more
- Than those I shed for him. What was he like?
- I have forgot him; my imagination
- Carries no favour in't but Bertram's.
- I am undone: there is no living, none,
- If Bertram be away. It were all one
- That I should love a bright particular star,
- And think to wed it, he is so above me:
- In his bright radiance and collateral light
- Must I be comforted, not in his sphere.
- The ambition in my love thus plagues itself:
- The hind that would be mated by the lion
- Must die for love. 'Twas pretty, though a plague,
- To see him every hour; to sit and draw
- His arched brows, his hawking eye, his curls,
- In our heart's table,—heart too capable
- Of every line and trick of his sweet favour:
- But now he's gone, and my idolatrous fancy
- Must sanctify his relics. Who comes here?
- One that goes with him: I love him for his sake;
- And yet I know him a notorious liar,
- Think him a great way fool, solely a coward;
- Yet these fix'd evils sit so fit in him
- That they take place when virtue's steely bones
- Looks bleak i' the cold wind: withal, full oft we see
- Cold wisdom waiting on superfluous folly.
[Enter PAROLLES.]
PAROLLES.
- Save you, fair queen!
HELENA.
- And you, monarch!
PAROLLES.
- No.
HELENA.
- And no.
PAROLLES.
- Are you meditating on virginity?
HELENA.
- Ay. You have some stain of soldier in you: let me ask you
a
- question. Man is enemy to virginity; how may we barricado
it
- against him?
PAROLLES.
- Keep him out.
HELENA.
- But he assails; and our virginity, though valiant in the
- defence, yet is weak: unfold to us some warlike
resistance.
PAROLLES.
- There is none: man, setting down before you, will undermine
you
- and blow you up.
HELENA.
- Bless our poor virginity from underminers and
blowers-up!—Is
- there no military policy how virgins might blow up men?
PAROLLES.
- Virginity being blown down, man will quicklier be blown
up:
- marry, in blowing him down again, with the breach
yourselves
- made, you lose your city. It is not politic in the
commonwealth
- of nature to preserve virginity. Loss of virginity is
rational
- increase; and there was never virgin got till virginity was
first
- lost. That you were made of is metal to make virgins.
Virginity
- by being once lost may be ten times found; by being ever kept,
it
- is ever lost: 'tis too cold a companion; away with it!
HELENA.
- I will stand for 't a little, though therefore I die a
virgin.
PAROLLES.
- There's little can be said in't; 'tis against the rule of
- nature. To speak on the part of virginity is to accuse
your
- mothers; which is most infallible disobedience. He that
hangs
- himself is a virgin: virginity murders itself; and should
be
- buried in highways, out of all sanctified limit, as a
desperate
- offendress against nature. Virginity breeds mites, much like
a
- cheese; consumes itself to the very paring, and so dies
with
- feeding his own stomach. Besides, virginity is peevish,
proud,
- idle, made of self-love, which is the most inhibited sin in
the
- canon. Keep it not; you cannot choose but lose by't: out
with't!
- within ten years it will make itself ten, which is a
goodly
- increase; and the principal itself not much the worse: away
with
- it!
HELENA.
- How might one do, sir, to lose it to her own liking?
PAROLLES.
- Let me see: marry, ill to like him that ne'er it likes. 'Tis
a
- commodity will lose the gloss with lying; the longer kept,
the
- less worth: off with't while 'tis vendible; answer the time
of
- request. Virginity, like an old courtier, wears her cap out
of
- fashion; richly suited, but unsuitable: just like the brooch
and
- the toothpick, which wear not now. Your date is better in
your
- pie and your porridge than in your cheek. And your
virginity,
- your old virginity, is like one of our French withered pears;
it
- looks ill, it eats drily; marry, 'tis a wither'd pear; it
was
- formerly better; marry, yet 'tis a wither'd pear. Will you
- anything with it?
HELENA.
- Not my virginity yet.
- There shall your master have a thousand loves,
- A mother, and a mistress, and a friend,
- A phoenix, captain, and an enemy,
- A guide, a goddess, and a sovereign,
- A counsellor, a traitress, and a dear:
- His humble ambition, proud humility,
- His jarring concord, and his discord dulcet,
- His faith, his sweet disaster; with a world
- Of pretty, fond, adoptious christendoms,
- That blinking Cupid gossips. Now shall he—
- I know not what he shall:—God send him well!—
- The court's a learning-place;—and he is one,—
PAROLLES.
- What one, i' faith?
HELENA.
- That I wish well.—'Tis pity—
PAROLLES.
- What's pity?
HELENA.
- That wishing well had not a body in't
- Which might be felt; that we, the poorer born,
- Whose baser stars do shut us up in wishes,
- Might with effects of them follow our friends
- And show what we alone must think; which never
- Returns us thanks.
[Enter a PAGE.]
PAGE.
- Monsieur Parolles, my lord calls for you.
[Exit PAGE.]
PAROLLES.
- Little Helen, farewell: if I can remember thee, I will
- think of thee at court.
HELENA.
- Monsieur Parolles, you were born under a charitable star.
PAROLLES.
- Under Mars, I.
HELENA.
- I especially think, under Mars.
PAROLLES.
- Why under Mars?
HELENA.
- The wars hath so kept you under that you must needs be
born
- under Mars.
PAROLLES.
- When he was predominant.
HELENA.
- When he was retrograde, I think, rather.
PAROLLES.
- Why think you so?
HELENA.
- You go so much backward when you fight.
PAROLLES.
- That's for advantage.
HELENA.
- So is running away, when fear proposes the safety: but the
- composition that your valour and fear makes in you is a virtue
of
- a good wing, and I like the wear well.
PAROLLES.
- I am so full of business I cannot answer thee acutely. I
- will return perfect courtier; in the which my instruction
shall
- serve to naturalize thee, so thou wilt be capable of a
courtier's
- counsel, and understand what advice shall thrust upon thee;
else
- thou diest in thine unthankfulness, and thine ignorance
makes
- thee away: farewell. When thou hast leisure, say thy
prayers;
- when thou hast none, remember thy friends: get thee a good
- husband, and use him as he uses thee: so, farewell.
[Exit.]
HELENA.
- Our remedies oft in ourselves do lie,
- Which we ascribe to heaven: the fated sky
- Gives us free scope; only doth backward pull
- Our slow designs when we ourselves are dull.
- What power is it which mounts my love so high,—
- That makes me see, and cannot feed mine eye?
- The mightiest space in fortune nature brings
- To join like likes, and kiss like native things.
- Impossible be strange attempts to those
- That weigh their pains in sense, and do suppose
- What hath been cannot be: who ever strove
- To show her merit that did miss her love?
- The king's disease,—my project may deceive me,
- But my intents are fix'd, and will not leave me.
[Exit.]
SCENE 2. Paris.
A room in the King's palace.
[Flourish of cornets. Enter the KING OF FRANCE, with letters;
Lords and others attending.]
KING.
- The Florentines and Senoys are by the ears;
- Have fought with equal fortune, and continue
- A braving war.
FIRST LORD.
- So 'tis reported, sir.
KING.
- Nay, 'tis most credible; we here receive it,
- A certainty, vouch'd from our cousin Austria,
- With caution, that the Florentine will move us
- For speedy aid; wherein our dearest friend
- Prejudicates the business, and would seem
- To have us make denial.
FIRST LORD.
- His love and wisdom,
- Approv'd so to your majesty, may plead
- For amplest credence.
KING.
- He hath arm'd our answer,
- And Florence is denied before he comes:
- Yet, for our gentlemen that mean to see
- The Tuscan service, freely have they leave
- To stand on either part.
SECOND LORD.
- It well may serve
- A nursery to our gentry, who are sick
- For breathing and exploit.
KING.
- What's he comes here?
[Enter BERTRAM, LAFEU, and PAROLLES.]
FIRST LORD.
- It is the Count Rousillon, my good lord,
- Young Bertram.
KING.
- Youth, thou bear'st thy father's face;
- Frank nature, rather curious than in haste,
- Hath well compos'd thee. Thy father's moral parts
- Mayst thou inherit too! Welcome to Paris.
BERTRAM.
- My thanks and duty are your majesty's.
KING.
- I would I had that corporal soundness now,
- As when thy father and myself in friendship
- First tried our soldiership! He did look far
- Into the service of the time, and was
- Discipled of the bravest: he lasted long;
- But on us both did haggish age steal on,
- And wore us out of act. It much repairs me
- To talk of your good father. In his youth
- He had the wit which I can well observe
- To-day in our young lords; but they may jest
- Till their own scorn return to them unnoted,
- Ere they can hide their levity in honour
- So like a courtier: contempt nor bitterness
- Were in his pride or sharpness; if they were,
- His equal had awak'd them; and his honour,
- Clock to itself, knew the true minute when
- Exception bid him speak, and at this time
- His tongue obey'd his hand: who were below him
- He us'd as creatures of another place;
- And bow'd his eminent top to their low ranks,
- Making them proud of his humility,
- In their poor praise he humbled. Such a man
- Might be a copy to these younger times;
- Which, follow'd well, would demonstrate them now
- But goers backward.
BERTRAM.
- His good remembrance, sir,
- Lies richer in your thoughts than on his tomb;
- So in approof lives not his epitaph
- As in your royal speech.
KING.
- Would I were with him! He would always say,—
- Methinks I hear him now; his plausive words
- He scatter'd not in ears, but grafted them
- To grow there, and to bear,—'Let me not live,'—
- This his good melancholy oft began,
- On the catastrophe and heel of pastime,
- When it was out,—'Let me not live' quoth he,
- 'After my flame lacks oil, to be the snuff
- Of younger spirits, whose apprehensive senses
- All but new things disdain; whose judgments are
- Mere fathers of their garments; whose constancies
- Expire before their fashions:'—This he wish'd:
- I, after him, do after him wish too,
- Since I nor wax nor honey can bring home,
- I quickly were dissolved from my hive,
- To give some labourers room.
SECOND LORD.
- You're lov'd, sir;
- They that least lend it you shall lack you first.
KING.
- I fill a place, I know't.—How long is't, Count,
- Since the physician at your father's died?
- He was much fam'd.
BERTRAM.
- Some six months since, my lord.
KING.
- If he were living, I would try him yet;—
- Lend me an arm;—the rest have worn me out
- With several applications:—nature and sickness
- Debate it at their leisure. Welcome, count;
- My son's no dearer.
BERTRAM.
- Thank your majesty.
[Exeunt. Flourish.]
SCENE 3. Rousillon.
A Room in the Palace.
[Enter COUNTESS, STEWARD, and CLOWN.]
COUNTESS.
- I will now hear: what say you of this gentlewoman?
STEWARD.
- Madam, the care I have had to even your content, I wish
- might be found in the calendar of my past endeavours; for then
we
- wound our modesty, and make foul the clearness of our
deservings,
- when of ourselves we publish them.
COUNTESS.
- What does this knave here? Get you gone, sirrah: the
- complaints I have heard of you I do not all believe; 'tis
my
- slowness that I do not; for I know you lack not folly to
commit
- them, and have ability enough to make such knaveries
yours.
CLOWN.
- 'Tis not unknown to you, madam, I am a poor fellow.
COUNTESS.
- Well, sir.
CLOWN.
- No, madam, 'tis not so well that I am poor, though many of
- the rich are damned: but if I may have your ladyship's good
will
- to go to the world, Isbel the woman and I will do as we
may.
COUNTESS.
- Wilt thou needs be a beggar?
CLOWN.
- I do beg your good will in this case.
COUNTESS.
- In what case?
CLOWN.
- In Isbel's case and mine own. Service is no heritage: and
I
- think I shall never have the blessing of God till I have issue
of
- my body; for they say bairns are blessings.
COUNTESS.
- Tell me thy reason why thou wilt marry.
CLOWN.
- My poor body, madam, requires it: I am driven on by the
- flesh; and he must needs go that the devil drives.
COUNTESS.
- Is this all your worship's reason?
CLOWN.
- Faith, madam, I have other holy reasons, such as they are.
COUNTESS.
- May the world know them?
CLOWN.
- I have been, madam, a wicked creature, as you and all
flesh
- and blood are; and, indeed, I do marry that I may repent.
COUNTESS.
- Thy marriage, sooner than thy wickedness.
CLOWN.
- I am out of friends, madam, and I hope to have friends for
- my wife's sake.
COUNTESS.
- Such friends are thine enemies, knave.
CLOWN.
- Y'are shallow, madam, in great friends: for the knaves
come
- to do that for me which I am a-weary of. He that ears my
land
- spares my team, and gives me leave to in the crop: if I be
his
- cuckold, he's my drudge: he that comforts my wife is the
- cherisher of my flesh and blood; he that cherishes my flesh
and
- blood loves my flesh and blood; he that loves my flesh and
blood
- is my friend; ergo, he that kisses my wife is my friend. If
men
- could be contented to be what they are, there were no fear
in
- marriage; for young Charbon the puritan and old Poysam the
- papist, howsome'er their hearts are severed in religion,
their
- heads are both one; they may joll horns together like any
deer
- i' the herd.
COUNTESS.
- Wilt thou ever be a foul-mouth'd and calumnious knave?
CLOWN.
- A prophet I, madam; and I speak the truth the next way:
- For I the ballad will repeat,
- Which men full true shall find;
- Your marriage comes by destiny,
- Your cuckoo sings by kind.
COUNTESS.
- Get you gone, sir; I'll talk with you more anon.
STEWARD.
- May it please you, madam, that he bid Helen come to you; of her
I
- am to speak.
COUNTESS.
- Sirrah, tell my gentlewoman I would speak with her; Helen I
mean.
CLOWN.
- [Sings.]
- Was this fair face the cause, quoth she
- Why the Grecians sacked Troy?
- Fond done, done fond,
- Was this King Priam's joy?
- With that she sighed as she stood,
- With that she sighed as she stood,
- And gave this sentence then:—
- Among nine bad if one be good,
- Among nine bad if one be good,
- There's yet one good in ten.
COUNTESS.
- What, one good in ten? you corrupt the song, sirrah.
CLOWN.
- One good woman in ten, madam, which is a purifying o' the
- song: would God would serve the world so all the year! we'd
find
- no fault with the tithe-woman, if I were the parson: one in
ten,
- quoth 'a! an we might have a good woman born before every
blazing
- star, or at an earthquake, 'twould mend the lottery well: a
man
- may draw his heart out ere he pluck one.
COUNTESS.
- You'll be gone, sir knave, and do as I command you!
CLOWN.
- That man should be at woman's command, and yet no hurt
done!—
- Though honesty be no puritan, yet it will do no hurt; it
will
- wear the surplice of humility over the black gown of a big
- heart.—I am going, forsooth:the business is for Helen to
come
- hither.
[Exit.]
COUNTESS.
- Well, now.
STEWARD.
- I know, madam, you love your gentlewoman entirely.
COUNTESS.
- Faith I do: her father bequeathed her to me; and she
herself,
- without other advantage, may lawfully make title to as much
love
- as she finds: there is more owing her than is paid; and
more
- shall be paid her than she'll demand.
STEWARD.
- Madam, I was very late more near her than I think she wished
me:
- alone she was, and did communicate to herself her own words
to
- her own ears; she thought, I dare vow for her, they touched
not
- any stranger sense. Her matter was, she loved your son:
Fortune,
- she said, was no goddess, that had put such difference
betwixt
- their two estates; Love no god, that would not extend his
might
- only where qualities were level; Diana no queen of virgins,
that
- would suffer her poor knight surprise, without rescue in
the
- first assault, or ransom afterward. This she delivered in
the
- most bitter touch of sorrow that e'er I heard virgin exclaim
in;
- which I held my duty speedily to acquaint you withal;
sithence,
- in the loss that may happen, it concerns you something to
know
- it.
COUNTESS.
- You have discharged this honestly; keep it to yourself;
many
- likelihoods informed me of this before, which hung so
- tottering in the balance that I could neither believe nor
- misdoubt. Pray you leave me: stall this in your bosom; and
I
- thank you for your honest care: I will speak with you
further
- anon.
[Exit STEWARD.]
- Even so it was with me when I was young:
- If ever we are nature's, these are ours; this thorn
- Doth to our rose of youth rightly belong;
- Our blood to us, this to our blood is born;
- It is the show and seal of nature's truth,
- Where love's strong passion is impress'd in youth:
- By our remembrances of days foregone,
- Such were our faults:—or then we thought them none.
[Enter HELENA.]
- Her eye is sick on't;—I observe her now.
HELENA.
- What is your pleasure, madam?
COUNTESS.
- You know, Helen,
- I am a mother to you.
HELENA.
- Mine honourable mistress.
COUNTESS.
- Nay, a mother.
- Why not a mother? When I said a mother,
- Methought you saw a serpent: what's in mother,
- That you start at it? I say I am your mother;
- And put you in the catalogue of those
- That were enwombed mine. 'Tis often seen
- Adoption strives with nature; and choice breeds
- A native slip to us from foreign seeds:
- You ne'er oppress'd me with a mother's groan,
- Yet I express to you a mother's care:—
- God's mercy, maiden! does it curd thy blood
- To say I am thy mother? What's the matter,
- That this distemper'd messenger of wet,
- The many-colour'd iris, rounds thine eye?
- Why,—that you are my daughter?
HELENA.
- That I am not.
COUNTESS.
- I say, I am your mother.
HELENA.
- Pardon, madam;
- The Count Rousillon cannot be my brother:
- I am from humble, he from honour'd name;
- No note upon my parents, his all noble;
- My master, my dear lord he is; and I
- His servant live, and will his vassal die:
- He must not be my brother.
COUNTESS.
- Nor I your mother?
HELENA.
- You are my mother, madam; would you were,—
- So that my lord your son were not my brother,—
- Indeed my mother!—or were you both our mothers,
- I care no more for than I do for heaven,
- So I were not his sister. Can't no other,
- But, I your daughter, he must be my brother?
COUNTESS.
- Yes, Helen, you might be my daughter-in-law:
- God shield you mean it not! daughter and mother
- So strive upon your pulse. What! pale again?
- My fear hath catch'd your fondness: now I see
- The mystery of your loneliness, and find
- Your salt tears' head. Now to all sense 'tis gross
- You love my son; invention is asham'd,
- Against the proclamation of thy passion,
- To say thou dost not: therefore tell me true;
- But tell me then, 'tis so;—for, look, thy cheeks
- Confess it, one to the other; and thine eyes
- See it so grossly shown in thy behaviours,
- That in their kind they speak it; only sin
- And hellish obstinacy tie thy tongue,
- That truth should be suspected. Speak, is't so?
- If it be so, you have wound a goodly clue;
- If it be not, forswear't: howe'er, I charge thee,
- As heaven shall work in me for thine avail,
- To tell me truly.
HELENA.
- Good madam, pardon me!
COUNTESS.
- Do you love my son?
HELENA.
- Your pardon, noble mistress!
COUNTESS.
- Love you my son?
HELENA.
- Do not you love him, madam?
COUNTESS.
- Go not about; my love hath in't a bond
- Whereof the world takes note: come, come, disclose
- The state of your affection; for your passions
- Have to the full appeach'd.
HELENA.
- Then I confess,
- Here on my knee, before high heaven and you,
- That before you, and next unto high heaven,
- I love your son:—
- My friends were poor, but honest; so's my love:
- Be not offended; for it hurts not him
- That he is lov'd of me: I follow him not
- By any token of presumptuous suit;
- Nor would I have him till I do deserve him;
- Yet never know how that desert should be.
- I know I love in vain, strive against hope;
- Yet in this captious and intenible sieve
- I still pour in the waters of my love,
- And lack not to lose still: thus, Indian-like,
- Religious in mine error, I adore
- The sun, that looks upon his worshipper,
- But knows of him no more. My dearest madam,
- Let not your hate encounter with my love,
- For loving where you do; but if yourself,
- Whose aged honour cites a virtuous youth,
- Did ever, in so true a flame of liking,
- Wish chastely, and love dearly, that your Dian
- Was both herself and love; O, then, give pity
- To her whose state is such that cannot choose
- But lend and give where she is sure to lose;
- That seeks not to find that her search implies,
- But, riddle-like, lives sweetly where she dies!
COUNTESS.
- Had you not lately an intent,—speak truly,—
- To go to Paris?
HELENA.
- Madam, I had.
COUNTESS.
- Wherefore? tell true.
HELENA.
- I will tell truth; by grace itself I swear.
- You know my father left me some prescriptions
- Of rare and prov'd effects, such as his reading
- And manifest experience had collected
- For general sovereignty; and that he will'd me
- In heedfullest reservation to bestow them,
- As notes whose faculties inclusive were
- More than they were in note: amongst the rest
- There is a remedy, approv'd, set down,
- To cure the desperate languishings whereof
- The king is render'd lost.
COUNTESS.
- This was your motive
- For Paris, was it? speak.
HELENA.
- My lord your son made me to think of this;
- Else Paris, and the medicine, and the king,
- Had from the conversation of my thoughts
- Haply been absent then.
COUNTESS.
- But think you, Helen,
- If you should tender your supposed aid,
- He would receive it? He and his physicians
- Are of a mind; he, that they cannot help him;
- They, that they cannot help: how shall they credit
- A poor unlearned virgin, when the schools,
- Embowell'd of their doctrine, have let off
- The danger to itself?
HELENA.
- There's something in't
- More than my father's skill, which was the greatest
- Of his profession, that his good receipt
- Shall, for my legacy, be sanctified
- By th' luckiest stars in heaven: and, would your honour
- But give me leave to try success, I'd venture
- The well-lost life of mine on his grace's cure.
- By such a day and hour.
COUNTESS.
- Dost thou believe't?
HELENA.
- Ay, madam, knowingly.
COUNTESS.
- Why, Helen, thou shalt have my leave, and love,
- Means, and attendants, and my loving greetings
- To those of mine in court: I'll stay at home,
- And pray God's blessing into thy attempt:
- Be gone to-morrow; and be sure of this,
- What I can help thee to thou shalt not miss.
[Exeunt.]
ACT II.
SCENE 1. Paris.
A room in the King's palace.
[Flourish. Enter the King, with young LORDS taking leave for the
Florentine war; BERTRAM, PAROLLES, and Attendants.]
KING.
- Farewell, young lord; these war-like principles
- Do not throw from you:—and you, my lord, farewell;—
- Share the advice betwixt you; if both gain all,
- The gift doth stretch itself as 'tis received,
- And is enough for both.
FIRST LORD.
- It is our hope, sir,
- After well-enter'd soldiers, to return
- And find your grace in health.
KING.
- No, no, it cannot be; and yet my heart
- Will not confess he owes the malady
- That doth my life besiege. Farewell, young lords;
- Whether I live or die, be you the sons
- Of worthy Frenchmen; let higher Italy,—
- Those bated that inherit but the fall
- Of the last monarchy,—see that you come
- Not to woo honour, but to wed it; when
- The bravest questant shrinks, find what you seek,
- That fame may cry you aloud: I say farewell.
SECOND LORD.
- Health, at your bidding, serve your majesty!
KING.
- Those girls of Italy, take heed of them;
- They say our French lack language to deny,
- If they demand: beware of being captives
- Before you serve.
BOTH.
- Our hearts receive your warnings.
KING.
- Farewell.—Come hither to me.
[The king retires to a couch.]
FIRST LORD.
- O my sweet lord, that you will stay behind us!
PAROLLES.
- 'Tis not his fault; the spark—
SECOND LORD.
- O, 'tis brave wars!
PAROLLES.
- Most admirable: I have seen those wars.
BERTRAM.
- I am commanded here and kept a coil with,
- 'Too young' and next year' and tis too early.'
PAROLLES.
- An thy mind stand to it, boy, steal away bravely.
BERTRAM.
- I shall stay here the forehorse to a smock,
- Creaking my shoes on the plain masonry,
- Till honour be bought up, and no sword worn
- But one to dance with! By heaven, I'll steal away.
FIRST LORD.
- There's honour in the theft.
PAROLLES.
- Commit it, count.
SECOND LORD.
- I am your accessary; and so farewell.
BERTRAM.
- I grow to you, and our parting is a tortured body.
FIRST LORD.
- Farewell, captain.
SECOND LORD.
- Sweet Monsieur Parolles!
PAROLLES.
- Noble heroes, my sword and yours are kin. Good sparks and
- lustrous, a word, good metals.—You shall find in the regiment
of
- the Spinii one Captain Spurio, with his cicatrice, an emblem
of
- war, here on his sinister cheek; it was this very sword
- entrenched it: say to him I live; and observe his reports for
me.
FIRST LORD.
- We shall, noble captain.
PAROLLES.
- Mars dote on you for his novices!
[Exeunt LORDS.]
- What will ye do?
BERTRAM.
- Stay; the king—
PAROLLES.
- Use a more spacious ceremony to the noble lords; you have
- restrained yourself within the list of too cold an adieu: be
more
- expressive to them; for they wear themselves in the cap of
the
- time; there do muster true gait; eat, speak, and move, under
the
- influence of the most received star; and though the devil
lead
- the measure, such are to be followed: after them, and take a
more
- dilated farewell.
BERTRAM.
- And I will do so.
PAROLLES.
- Worthy fellows; and like to prove most sinewy sword-men.
[Exeunt BERTRAM and PAROLLES.]
[Enter LAFEU.]
LAFEU.
- Pardon, my lord [kneeling], for me and for my tidings.
KING.
- I'll fee thee to stand up.
LAFEU.
- Then here's a man stands that has bought his pardon.
- I would you had kneel'd, my lord, to ask me mercy;
- And that at my bidding you could so stand up.
KING.
- I would I had; so I had broke thy pate,
- And ask'd thee mercy for't.
LAFEU.
- Good faith, across;
- But, my good lord, 'tis thus: will you be cured
- Of your infirmity?
KING.
- No.
LAFEU.
- O, will you eat
- No grapes, my royal fox? yes, but you will
- My noble grapes, and if my royal fox
- Could reach them: I have seen a medicine
- That's able to breathe life into a stone,
- Quicken a rock, and make you dance canary
- With spritely fire and motion; whose simple touch
- Is powerful to araise King Pipin, nay,
- To give great Charlemain a pen in his hand
- And write to her a love-line.
KING.
- What 'her' is that?
LAFEU.
- Why, doctor 'she': my lord, there's one arriv'd,
- If you will see her,—now, by my faith and honour,
- If seriously I may convey my thoughts
- In this my light deliverance, I have spoke
- With one that in her sex, her years, profession,
- Wisdom, and constancy, hath amaz'd me more
- Than I dare blame my weakness: will you see her,—
- For that is her demand,—and know her business?
- That done, laugh well at me.
KING.
- Now, good Lafeu,
- Bring in the admiration; that we with the
- May spend our wonder too, or take off thine
- By wondering how thou took'st it.
LAFEU.
- Nay, I'll fit you,
- And not be all day neither.
[Exit LAFEU.]
KING.
- Thus he his special nothing ever prologues.
[Re-enter LAFEU with HELENA.]
LAFEU.
- Nay, come your ways.
KING.
- This haste hath wings indeed.
LAFEU.
- Nay, come your ways;
- This is his majesty: say your mind to him.
- A traitor you do look like; but such traitors
- His majesty seldom fears: I am Cressid's uncle,
- That dare leave two together: fare you well.
[Exit.]
KING.
- Now, fair one, does your business follow us?
HELENA.
- Ay, my good lord. Gerard de Narbon was
- My father; in what he did profess, well found.
KING.
- I knew him.
HELENA.
- The rather will I spare my praises towards him.
- Knowing him is enough. On his bed of death
- Many receipts he gave me; chiefly one,
- Which, as the dearest issue of his practice,
- And of his old experience the only darling,
- He bade me store up as a triple eye,
- Safer than mine own two, more dear: I have so:
- And, hearing your high majesty is touch'd
- With that malignant cause wherein the honour
- Of my dear father's gift stands chief in power,
- I come to tender it, and my appliance,
- With all bound humbleness.
KING.
- We thank you, maiden:
- But may not be so credulous of cure,—
- When our most learned doctors leave us, and
- The congregated college have concluded
- That labouring art can never ransom nature
- From her inaidable estate,—I say we must not
- So stain our judgment, or corrupt our hope,
- To prostitute our past-cure malady
- To empirics; or to dissever so
- Our great self and our credit, to esteem
- A senseless help, when help past sense we deem.
HELENA.
- My duty, then, shall pay me for my pains:
- I will no more enforce mine office on you;
- Humbly entreating from your royal thoughts
- A modest one to bear me back again.
KING.
- I cannot give thee less, to be call'd grateful.
- Thou thought'st to help me; and such thanks I give
- As one near death to those that wish him live:
- But what at full I know, thou know'st no part;
- I knowing all my peril, thou no art.
HELENA.
- What I can do can do no hurt to try,
- Since you set up your rest 'gainst remedy.
- He that of greatest works is finisher
- Oft does them by the weakest minister:
- So holy writ in babes hath judgment shown,
- When judges have been babes. Great floods have flown
- From simple sources; and great seas have dried
- When miracles have by the greatest been denied.
- Oft expectation fails, and most oft there
- Where most it promises; and oft it hits
- Where hope is coldest, and despair most fits.
KING.
- I must not hear thee: fare thee well, kind maid;
- Thy pains, not used, must by thyself be paid:
- Proffers, not took, reap thanks for their reward.
HELENA.
- Inspired merit so by breath is barred:
- It is not so with Him that all things knows,
- As 'tis with us that square our guess by shows:
- But most it is presumption in us when
- The help of heaven we count the act of men.
- Dear sir, to my endeavours give consent:
- Of heaven, not me, make an experiment.
- I am not an impostor, that proclaim
- Myself against the level of mine aim;
- But know I think, and think I know most sure,
- My art is not past power nor you past cure.
KING.
- Art thou so confident? Within what space
- Hop'st thou my cure?
HELENA.
- The greatest grace lending grace.
- Ere twice the horses of the sun shall bring
- Their fiery torcher his diurnal ring;
- Ere twice in murk and occidental damp
- Moist Hesperus hath quench'd his sleepy lamp;
- Or four-and-twenty times the pilot's glass
- Hath told the thievish minutes how they pass;
- What is infirm from your sound parts shall fly,
- Health shall live free, and sickness freely die.
KING.
- Upon thy certainty and confidence
- What dar'st thou venture?
HELENA.
- Tax of impudence,—
- A strumpet's boldness, a divulged shame,—
- Traduc'd by odious ballads; my maiden's name
- Sear'd otherwise; ne worse of worst extended,
- With vilest torture let my life be ended.
KING.
- Methinks in thee some blessed spirit doth speak;
- His powerful sound within an organ weak:
- And what impossibility would slay
- In common sense, sense saves another way.
- Thy life is dear; for all that life can rate
- Worth name of life in thee hath estimate:
- Youth, beauty, wisdom, courage, all
- That happiness and prime can happy call;
- Thou this to hazard needs must intimate
- Skill infinite or monstrous desperate.
- Sweet practiser, thy physic I will try:
- That ministers thine own death if I die.
HELENA.
- If I break time, or flinch in property
- Of what I spoke, unpitied let me die;
- And well deserv'd. Not helping, death's my fee;
- But, if I help, what do you promise me?
KING.
- Make thy demand.
HELENA.
- But will you make it even?
KING.
- Ay, by my sceptre and my hopes of heaven.
HELENA.
- Then shalt thou give me, with thy kingly hand
- What husband in thy power I will command:
- Exempted be from me the arrogance
- To choose from forth the royal blood of France,
- My low and humble name to propagate
- With any branch or image of thy state:
- But such a one, thy vassal, whom I know
- Is free for me to ask, thee to bestow.
KING.
- Here is my hand; the premises observ'd,
- Thy will by my performance shall be serv'd;
- So make the choice of thy own time, for I,
- Thy resolv'd patient, on thee still rely.
- More should I question thee, and more I must,—
- Though more to know could not be more to trust,—
- From whence thou cam'st, how tended on.—But rest
- Unquestion'd welcome and undoubted blest.—
- Give me some help here, ho!—If thou proceed
- As high as word, my deed shall match thy deed.
[Flourish. Exeunt.]
SCENE
2. Rousillon. A room in the COUNTESS'S palace.
[Enter COUNTESS and CLOWN.]
COUNTESS.
- Come on, sir; I shall now put you to the height of your
- breeding.
CLOWN.
- I will show myself highly fed and lowly taught: I know my
- business is but to the court.
COUNTESS.
- To the court! why, what place make you special, when you
- put off that with such contempt? But to the court!
CLOWN.
- Truly, madam, if God have lent a man any manners, he may
- easily put it off at court: he that cannot make a leg, put
off's
- cap, kiss his hand, and say nothing, has neither leg, hands,
lip,
- nor cap; and indeed such a fellow, to say precisely, were not
for
- the court; but for me, I have an answer will serve all
men.
COUNTESS.
- Marry, that's a bountiful answer that fits all questions.
CLOWN.
- It is like a barber's chair, that fits all buttocks—the
pin-
- buttock, the quatch-buttock, the brawn-buttock, or any
buttock.
COUNTESS.
- Will your answer serve fit to all questions?
CLOWN.
- As fit as ten groats is for the hand of an attorney, as
your
- French crown for your taffety punk, as Tib's rush for
Tom's
- forefinger, as a pancake for Shrove-Tuesday, a morris for
Mayday,
- as the nail to his hole, the cuckold to his horn, as a
scolding
- quean to a wrangling knave, as the nun's lip to the
friar's
- mouth; nay, as the pudding to his skin.
COUNTESS.
- Have you, I, say, an answer of such fitness for all
questions?
CLOWN.
- From below your duke to beneath your constable, it will fit
any
- question.
COUNTESS.
- It must be an answer of most monstrous size that must fit
all
- demands.
CLOWN.
- But a trifle neither, in good faith, if the learned should
- speak truth of it: here it is, and all that belongs to't. Ask
me
- if I am a courtier: it shall do you no harm to learn.
COUNTESS.
- To be young again, if we could: I will be a fool in
question,
- hoping to be the wiser by your answer. I pray you, sir, are you
a
- courtier?
CLOWN.
- O Lord, sir!—There's a simple putting off. More, more, a
hundred
- of them.
COUNTESS.
- Sir, I am a poor friend of yours, that loves you.
CLOWN.
- O Lord, sir!—Thick, thick; spare not me.
COUNTESS.
- I think, sir, you can eat none of this homely meat.
CLOWN.
- O Lord, sir!—Nay, put me to't, I warrant you.
COUNTESS.
- You were lately whipped, sir, as I think.
CLOWN.
- O Lord, sir!—Spare not me.
COUNTESS.
- Do you cry 'O Lord, sir!' at your whipping, and 'spare not
me'?
- Indeed your 'O Lord, sir!' is very sequent to your whipping.
You
- would answer very well to a whipping, if you were but bound
to't.
CLOWN.
- I ne'er had worse luck in my life in my—'O Lord, sir!' I
see
- thing's may serve long, but not serve ever.
COUNTESS.
- I play the noble housewife with the time, to entertain it
so
- merrily with a fool.
CLOWN.
- O Lord, sir!—Why, there't serves well again.
COUNTESS.
- An end, sir! To your business. Give Helen this,
- And urge her to a present answer back:
- Commend me to my kinsmen and my son:
- This is not much.
CLOWN.
- Not much commendation to them.
COUNTESS.
- Not much employment for you: you understand me?
CLOWN.
- Most fruitfully: I am there before my legs.
COUNTESS.
- Haste you again.
[Exeunt severally.]
SCENE 3. Paris. The
KING'S palace.
[Enter BERTRAM, LAFEU, and PAROLLES.]
LAFEU.
- They say miracles are past; and we have our philosophical
- persons to make modern and familiar things supernatural
and
- causeless. Hence is it that we make trifles of terrors,
- ensconcing ourselves into seeming knowledge when we should
submit
- ourselves to an unknown fear.
PAROLLES.
- Why, 'tis the rarest argument of wonder that hath shot out in
our
- latter times.
BERTRAM.
- And so 'tis.
LAFEU.
- To be relinquish'd of the artists,—
PAROLLES.
- So I say; both of Galen and Paracelsus.
LAFEU.
- Of all the learned and authentic fellows,—
PAROLLES.
- Right; so I say.
LAFEU.
- That gave him out incurable,—
PAROLLES.
- Why, there 'tis; so say I too.
LAFEU.
- Not to be helped,—
PAROLLES.
- Right; as 'twere a man assured of a,—
LAFEU.
- Uncertain life and sure death.
PAROLLES.
- Just; you say well: so would I have said.
LAFEU.
- I may truly say, it is a novelty to the world.
PAROLLES.
- It is indeed: if you will have it in showing, you shall read
it
- in,—What do you call there?—
LAFEU.
- A showing of a heavenly effect in an earthly actor.
PAROLLES.
- That's it; I would have said the very same.
LAFEU.
- Why, your dolphin is not lustier: 'fore me, I speak in
- respect,—
PAROLLES.
- Nay, 'tis strange, 'tis very strange; that is the brief and
the
- tedious of it; and he's of a most facinerious spirit that
will
- not acknowledge it to be the,—
LAFEU.
- Very hand of heaven.
PAROLLES.
- Ay; so I say.
LAFEU.
- In a most weak,—
PAROLLES.
- And debile minister, great power, great transcendence:
which
- should, indeed, give us a further use to be made than
alone
- the recov'ry of the king, as to be,—
LAFEU.
- Generally thankful.
PAROLLES.
- I would have said it; you say well. Here comes the king.
[Enter KING, HELENA, and Attendants.]
LAFEU.
- Lustic, as the Dutchman says: I'll like a maid the better,
whilst
- I have a tooth in my head: why, he's able to lead her a
coranto.
PAROLLES.
- 'Mort du vinaigre!' is not this Helen?
LAFEU.
- 'Fore God, I think so.
KING.
- Go, call before me all the lords in court.—
[Exit an Attendant.]
- Sit, my preserver, by thy patient's side;
- And with this healthful hand, whose banish'd sense
- Thou has repeal'd, a second time receive
- The confirmation of my promis'd gift,
- Which but attends thy naming.
[Enter severaol Lords.]
- Fair maid, send forth thine eye: this youthful parcel
- Of noble bachelors stand at my bestowing,
- O'er whom both sovereign power and father's voice
- I have to use: thy frank election make;
- Thou hast power to choose, and they none to forsake.
HELENA.
- To each of you one fair and virtuous mistress
- Fall, when love please!—marry, to each, but one!
LAFEU.
- I'd give bay Curtal and his furniture,
- My mouth no more were broken than these boys',
- And writ as little beard.
KING.
- Peruse them well:
- Not one of those but had a noble father.
HELENA.
- Gentlemen,
- Heaven hath through me restor'd the king to health.
ALL.
- We understand it, and thank heaven for you.
HELENA.
- I am a simple maid, and therein wealthiest
- That I protest I simply am a maid.—
- Please it, your majesty, I have done already:
- The blushes in my cheeks thus whisper me—
- 'We blush that thou shouldst choose; but, be refus'd,
- Let the white death sit on thy cheek for ever;
- We'll ne'er come there again.'
KING.
- Make choice; and, see:
- Who shuns thy love shuns all his love in me.
HELENA.
- Now, Dian, from thy altar do I fly,
- And to imperial Love, that god most high,
- Do my sighs stream.—Sir, will you hear my suit?
FIRST LORD.
- And grant it.
HELENA.
- Thanks, sir; all the rest is mute.
LAFEU.
- I had rather be in this choice than throw ames-ace for my
life.
HELENA.
- The honour, sir, that flames in your fair eyes,
- Before I speak, too threateningly replies:
- Love make your fortunes twenty times above
- Her that so wishes, and her humble love!
SECOND LORD.
- No better, if you please.
HELENA.
- My wish receive,
- Which great Love grant; and so I take my leave.
LAFEU.
- Do all they deny her? An they were sons of mine I'd have
them
- whipped; or I would send them to the Turk to make eunuchs
of.
HELENA.
- [To third Lord.] Be not afraid that I your hand should
take;
- I'll never do you wrong for your own sake:
- Blessing upon your vows! and in your bed
- Find fairer fortune, if you ever wed!
LAFEU.
- These boys are boys of ice: they'll none have her:
- Sure, they are bastards to the English; the French ne'er got
'em.
HELENA.
- You are too young, too happy, and too good,
- To make yourself a son out of my blood.
FOURTH LORD.
- Fair one, I think not so.
LAFEU.
- There's one grape yet,—I am sure thy father drank
wine.—But
- if thou beest not an ass, I am a youth of fourteen; I have
known
- thee already.
HELENA.
- [To BERTRAM.] I dare not say I take you; but I give
- Me and my service, ever whilst I live,
- Into your guiding power.—This is the man.
KING.
- Why, then, young Bertram, take her; she's thy wife.
BERTRAM.
- My wife, my liege! I shall beseech your highness,
- In such a business give me leave to use
- The help of mine own eyes.
KING.
- Know'st thou not, Bertram,
- What she has done for me?
BERTRAM.
- Yes, my good lord;
- But never hope to know why I should marry her.
KING.
- Thou know'st she has rais'd me from my sickly bed.
BERTRAM.
- But follows it, my lord, to bring me down
- Must answer for your raising? I know her well;
- She had her breeding at my father's charge:
- A poor physician's daughter my wife!—Disdain
- Rather corrupt me ever!
KING.
- 'Tis only title thou disdain'st in her, the which
- I can build up. Strange is it that our bloods,
- Of colour, weight, and heat, pour'd all together,
- Would quite confound distinction, yet stand off
- In differences so mighty. If she be
- All that is virtuous,—save what thou dislik'st,
- A poor physician's daughter,—thou dislik'st
- Of virtue for the name: but do not so:
- From lowest place when virtuous things proceed,
- The place is dignified by the doer's deed:
- Where great additions swell's, and virtue none,
- It is a dropsied honour: good alone
- Is good without a name; vileness is so:
- The property by what it is should go,
- Not by the title. She is young, wise, fair;
- In these to nature she's immediate heir;
- And these breed honour: that is honour's scorn
- Which challenges itself as honour's born,
- And is not like the sire: honours thrive
- When rather from our acts we them derive
- Than our fore-goers: the mere word's a slave,
- Debauch'd on every tomb; on every grave
- A lying trophy; and as oft is dumb
- Where dust and damn'd oblivion is the tomb
- Of honour'd bones indeed. What should be said?
- If thou canst like this creature as a maid,
- I can create the rest: virtue and she
- Is her own dower; honour and wealth from me.
BERTRAM.
- I cannot love her, nor will strive to do 't.
KING.
- Thou wrong'st thyself, if thou shouldst strive to choose.
HELENA.
- That you are well restor'd, my lord, I am glad:
- Let the rest go.
KING.
- My honour's at the stake; which to defeat,
- I must produce my power. Here, take her hand,
- Proud scornful boy, unworthy this good gift;
- That dost in vile misprision shackle up
- My love and her desert; that canst not dream
- We, poising us in her defective scale,
- Shall weigh thee to the beam; that wilt not know
- It is in us to plant thine honour where
- We please to have it grow. Check thy contempt:
- Obey our will, which travails in thy good;
- Believe not thy disdain, but presently
- Do thine own fortunes that obedient right
- Which both thy duty owes and our power claims
- Or I will throw thee from my care for ever,
- Into the staggers and the careless lapse
- Of youth and ignorance; both my revenge and hate
- Loosing upon thee in the name of justice,
- Without all terms of pity. Speak! thine answer!
BERTRAM.
- Pardon, my gracious lord; for I submit
- My fancy to your eyes: when I consider
- What great creation, and what dole of honour
- Flies where you bid it, I find that she, which late
- Was in my nobler thoughts most base, is now
- The praised of the king; who, so ennobled,
- Is as 'twere born so.
KING.
- Take her by the hand,
- And tell her she is thine: to whom I promise
- A counterpoise; if not to thy estate,
- A balance more replete.
BERTRAM.
- I take her hand.
KING.
- Good fortune and the favour of the king
- Smile upon this contract; whose ceremony
- Shall seem expedient on the now-born brief,
- And be perform'd to-night: the solemn feast
- Shall more attend upon the coming space,
- Expecting absent friends. As thou lov'st her,
- Thy love's to me religious; else, does err.
[Exeunt KING, BERTAM, HELENA, Lords, and Attendants.]
LAFEU.
- Do you hear, monsieur? a word with you.
PAROLLES.
- Your pleasure, sir?
LAFEU.
- Your lord and master did well to make his recantation.
PAROLLES.
- Recantation!—my lord! my master!
LAFEU.
- Ay; is it not a language I speak?
PAROLLES.
- A most harsh one, and not to be understood without bloody
- succeeding. My master!
LAFEU.
- Are you companion to the Count Rousillon?
PAROLLES.
- To any count; to all counts; to what is man.
LAFEU.
- To what is count's man: count's master is of another
style.
PAROLLES.
- You are too old, sir; let it satisfy you, you are too old.
LAFEU.
- I must tell thee, sirrah, I write man; to which title age
cannot
- bring thee.
PAROLLES.
- What I dare too well do, I dare not do.
LAFEU.
- I did think thee, for two ordinaries, to be a pretty wise
- fellow; thou didst make tolerable vent of thy travel; it
might
- pass: yet the scarfs and the bannerets about thee did
manifoldly
- dissuade me from believing thee a vessel of too great a burden.
I
- have now found thee; when I lose thee again I care not: yet
art
- thou good for nothing but taking up; and that thou art
scarce
- worth.
PAROLLES.
- Hadst thou not the privilege of antiquity upon thee,—
LAFEU.
- Do not plunge thyself too far in anger, lest thou hasten
thy
- trial; which if—Lord have mercy on thee for a hen! So, my
good
- window of lattice, fare thee well: thy casement I need not
open,
- for I look through thee. Give me thy hand.
PAROLLES.
- My lord, you give me most egregious indignity.
LAFEU.
- Ay, with all my heart; and thou art worthy of it.
PAROLLES.
- I have not, my lord, deserved it.
LAFEU.
- Yes, good faith, every dram of it: and I will not bate
thee
- a scruple.
PAROLLES.
- Well, I shall be wiser.
LAFEU.
- E'en as soon as thou canst, for thou hast to pull at a
smack
- o' th' contrary. If ever thou beest bound in thy scarf and
- beaten, thou shalt find what it is to be proud of thy bondage.
I
- have a desire to hold my acquaintance with thee, or rather
my
- knowledge, that I may say in the default, he is a man I
know.
PAROLLES.
- My lord, you do me most insupportable vexation.
LAFEU.
- I would it were hell-pains for thy sake, and my poor doing
- eternal: for doing I am past; as I will by thee, in what
motion
- age will give me leave.
[Exit.]
PAROLLES.
- Well, thou hast a son shall take this disgrace off me;
- scurvy, old, filthy, scurvy lord!—Well, I must be patient;
there
- is no fettering of authority. I'll beat him, by my life, if I
can
- meet him with any convenience, an he were double and double
a
- lord. I'll have no more pity of his age than I would have
of—
- I'll beat him, an if I could but meet him again.
[Re-enter LAFEU.]
LAFEU.
- Sirrah, your lord and master's married; there's news for you;
you
- have a new mistress.
PAROLLES.
- I most unfeignedly beseech your lordship to make some
reservation
- of your wrongs: he is my good lord: whom I serve above is
my
- master.
LAFEU.
- Who? God?
PAROLLES.
- Ay, sir.
LAFEU.
- The devil it is that's thy master. Why dost thou garter up
thy
- arms o' this fashion? dost make hose of thy sleeves? do
other
- servants so? Thou wert best set thy lower part where thy
nose
- stands. By mine honour, if I were but two hours younger, I'd
beat
- thee: methink'st thou art a general offence, and every man
should
- beat thee. I think thou wast created for men to breathe
- themselves upon thee.
PAROLLES.
- This is hard and undeserved measure, my lord.
LAFEU.
- Go to, sir; you were beaten in Italy for picking a kernel
- out of a pomegranate; you are a vagabond, and no true
traveller:
- you are more saucy with lords and honourable personages than
the
- heraldry of your birth and virtue gives you commission. You
are
- not worth another word, else I'd call you knave. I leave
you.
[Exit.]
PAROLLES.
- Good, very good, it is so then.—Good, very good; let it
- be concealed awhile.
[Enter BERTRAM.]
BERTRAM.
- Undone, and forfeited to cares for ever!
PAROLLES.
- What's the matter, sweet heart?
BERTRAM.
- Although before the solemn priest I have sworn,
- I will not bed her.
PAROLLES.
- What, what, sweet heart?
BERTRAM.
- O my Parolles, they have married me!—
- I'll to the Tuscan wars, and never bed her.
PAROLLES.
- France is a dog-hole, and it no more merits
- The tread of a man's foot:—to the wars!
BERTRAM.
- There's letters from my mother; what the import is
- I know not yet.
PAROLLES.
- Ay, that would be known. To the wars, my boy, to the wars!
- He wears his honour in a box unseen
- That hugs his kicksy-wicksy here at home,
- Spending his manly marrow in her arms,
- Which should sustain the bound and high curvet
- Of Mars's fiery steed. To other regions!
- France is a stable; we that dwell in't, jades;
- Therefore, to the war!
BERTRAM.
- It shall be so; I'll send her to my house,
- Acquaint my mother with my hate to her,
- And wherefore I am fled; write to the king
- That which I durst not speak: his present gift
- Shall furnish me to those Italian fields
- Where noble fellows strike: war is no strife
- To the dark house and the detested wife.
PAROLLES.
- Will this caprichio hold in thee, art sure?
BERTRAM.
- Go with me to my chamber and advise me.
- I'll send her straight away: to-morrow
- I'll to the wars, she to her single sorrow.
PAROLLES.
- Why, these balls bound; there's noise in it. 'Tis hard:
- A young man married is a man that's marr'd:
- Therefore away, and leave her bravely; go:
- The king has done you wrong: but, hush, 'tis so.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE 4. The
same. Another room in the same.
[Enter HELENA and CLOWN.]
HELENA.
- My mother greets me kindly: is she well?
CLOWN.
- She is not well, but yet she has her health: she's very
- merry, but yet she is not well: but thanks be given, she's
very
- well, and wants nothing i' the world; but yet she is not
well.
HELENA.
- If she be very well, what does she ail that she's not very
well?
CLOWN.
- Truly, she's very well indeed, but for two things.
HELENA.
- What two things?
CLOWN.
- One, that she's not in heaven, whither God send her
quickly!
- The other, that she's in earth, from whence God send her
quickly!
[Enter PAROLLES.]
PAROLLES.
- Bless you, my fortunate lady!
HELENA.
- I hope, sir, I have your good will to have mine own good
- fortunes.
PAROLLES.
- You had my prayers to lead them on; and to keep them on,
- have them still. O, my knave,—how does my old lady?
CLOWN.
- So that you had her wrinkles and I her money, I would she did
as
- you say.
PAROLLES.
- Why, I say nothing.
CLOWN.
- Marry, you are the wiser man; for many a man's tongue shakes
out
- his master's undoing: to say nothing, to do nothing, to
know
- nothing, and to have nothing, is to be a great part of
your
- title; which is within a very little of nothing.
PAROLLES.
- Away! thou art a knave.
CLOWN.
- You should have said, sir, before a knave thou art a
knave;
- that is before me thou art a knave: this had been truth,
sir.
PAROLLES.
- Go to, thou art a witty fool; I have found thee.
CLOWN.
- Did you find me in yourself, sir? or were you taught to find
me?
- The search, sir, was profitable; and much fool may you find
in
- you, even to the world's pleasure and the increase of
laughter.
PAROLLES.
- A good knave, i' faith, and well fed.—
- Madam, my lord will go away to-night:
- A very serious business calls on him.
- The great prerogative and right of love,
- Which, as your due, time claims, he does acknowledge;
- But puts it off to a compell'd restraint;
- Whose want, and whose delay, is strew'd with sweets;
- Which they distil now in the curbed time,
- To make the coming hour o'erflow with joy
- And pleasure drown the brim.
HELENA.
- What's his will else?
PAROLLES.
- That you will take your instant leave o' the king,
- And make this haste as your own good proceeding,
- Strengthen'd with what apology you think
- May make it probable need.
HELENA.
- What more commands he?
PAROLLES.
- That, having this obtain'd, you presently
- Attend his further pleasure.
HELENA.
- In everything I wait upon his will.
PAROLLES.
- I shall report it so.
HELENA.
- I pray you.—Come, sirrah.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE 5. Another room in
the same.
[Enter LAFEU and BERTRAM.]
LAFEU.
- But I hope your lordship thinks not him a soldier.
BERTRAM.
- Yes, my lord, and of very valiant approof.
LAFEU.
- You have it from his own deliverance.
BERTRAM.
- And by other warranted testimony.
LAFEU.
- Then my dial goes not true: I took this lark for a
bunting.
BERTRAM.
- I do assure you, my lord, he is very great in knowledge,
- and accordingly valiant.
LAFEU.
- I have, then, sinned against his experience and
transgressed
- against his valour; and my state that way is dangerous, since
I
- cannot yet find in my heart to repent. Here he comes; I pray
you
- make us friends; I will pursue the amity
[Enter PAROLLES.]
PAROLLES.
- [To BERTRAM.] These things shall be done, sir.
LAFEU.
- Pray you, sir, who's his tailor?
PAROLLES.
- Sir!
LAFEU.
- O, I know him well, I, sir; he, sir, is a good workman,
- a very good tailor.
BERTRAM.
- [Aside to PAROLLES.] Is she gone to the king?
PAROLLES.
- She is.
BERTRAM.
- Will she away to-night?
PAROLLES.
- As you'll have her.
BERTRAM.
- I have writ my letters, casketed my treasure,
- Given order for our horses; and to-night,
- When I should take possession of the bride,
- End ere I do begin.
LAFEU.
- A good traveller is something at the latter end of a
dinner;
- but one that lies three-thirds and uses a known truth to pass
a
- thousand nothings with, should be once heard and thrice
beaten.—
- God save you, Captain.
BERTRAM.
- Is there any unkindness between my lord and you, monsieur?
PAROLLES.
- I know not how I have deserved to run into my lord's
displeasure.
LAFEU.
- You have made shift to run into 't, boots and spurs and
all,
- like him that leapt into the custard; and out of it you'll
run
- again, rather than suffer question for your residence.
BERTRAM.
- It may be you have mistaken him, my lord.
LAFEU.
- And shall do so ever, though I took him at his prayers.
- Fare you well, my lord; and believe this of me, there can be
no
- kernal in this light nut; the soul of this man is his
clothes;
- trust him not in matter of heavy consequence; I have kept of
them
- tame, and know their natures.—Farewell, monsieur; I have
spoken
- better of you than you have or will to deserve at my hand; but
we
- must do good against evil.
[Exit.]
PAROLLES.
- An idle lord, I swear.
BERTRAM.
- I think so.
PAROLLES.
- Why, do you not know him?
BERTRAM.
- Yes, I do know him well; and common speech
- Gives him a worthy pass. Here comes my clog.
[Enter HELENA.]
HELENA.
- I have, sir, as I was commanded from you,
- Spoke with the king, and have procur'd his leave
- For present parting; only he desires
- Some private speech with you.
BERTRAM.
- I shall obey his will.
- You must not marvel, Helen, at my course,
- Which holds not colour with the time, nor does
- The ministration and required office
- On my particular. Prepared I was not
- For such a business; therefore am I found
- So much unsettled: this drives me to entreat you:
- That presently you take your way for home,
- And rather muse than ask why I entreat you:
- For my respects are better than they seem;
- And my appointments have in them a need
- Greater than shows itself at the first view
- To you that know them not. This to my mother:
[Giving a letter.]
- 'Twill be two days ere I shall see you; so
- I leave you to your wisdom.
HELENA.
- Sir, I can nothing say
- But that I am your most obedient servant.
BERTRAM.
- Come, come, no more of that.
HELENA.
- And ever shall
- With true observance seek to eke out that
- Wherein toward me my homely stars have fail'd
- To equal my great fortune.
BERTRAM.
- Let that go:
- My haste is very great. Farewell; hie home.
HELENA.
- Pray, sir, your pardon.
BERTRAM.
- Well, what would you say?
HELENA.
- I am not worthy of the wealth I owe;
- Nor dare I say 'tis mine, and yet it is;
- But, like a timorous thief, most fain would steal
- What law does vouch mine own.
BERTRAM.
- What would you have?
HELENA.
- Something; and scarce so much:—nothing, indeed.—
- I would not tell you what I would, my lord:—Faith, yes;—
- Strangers and foes do sunder and not kiss.
BERTRAM.
- I pray you, stay not, but in haste to horse.
HELENA.
- I shall not break your bidding, good my lord.
BERTRAM.
- Where are my other men, monsieur?—
- Farewell,
[Exit HELENA.]
- Go thou toward home, where I will never come
- Whilst I can shake my sword or hear the drum:—
- Away, and for our flight.
PAROLLES.
- Bravely, coragio!
[Exeunt.]
ACT III.
SCENE 1.
Florence. A room in the DUKE's palace.
[Flourish. Enter the DUKE OF FLORENCE, attended; two French
Lords, and Soldiers.]
DUKE.
- So that, from point to point, now have you heard
- The fundamental reasons of this war;
- Whose great decision hath much blood let forth,
- And more thirsts after.
FIRST LORD.
- Holy seems the quarrel
- Upon your grace's part; black and fearful
- On the opposer.
DUKE.
- Therefore we marvel much our cousin France
- Would, in so just a business, shut his bosom
- Against our borrowing prayers.
SECOND LORD.
- Good my lord,
- The reasons of our state I cannot yield,
- But like a common and an outward man
- That the great figure of a council frames
- By self-unable motion; therefore dare not
- Say what I think of it, since I have found
- Myself in my incertain grounds to fail
- As often as I guess'd.
DUKE.
- Be it his pleasure.
FIRST LORD.
- But I am sure the younger of our nature,
- That surfeit on their ease, will day by day
- Come here for physic.
DUKE.
- Welcome shall they be;
- And all the honours that can fly from us
- Shall on them settle. You know your places well;
- When better fall, for your avails they fell:
- To-morrow to th' field.
[Flourish. Exeunt.]
SCENE
2. Rousillon. A room in the COUNTESS'S palace.
[Enter COUNTESS and CLOWN.]
COUNTESS.
- It hath happened all as I would have had it, save that he
- comes not along with her.
CLOWN.
- By my troth, I take my young lord to be a very melancholy
man.
COUNTESS.
- By what observance, I pray you?
CLOWN.
- Why, he will look upon his boot and sing; mend the ruff and
sing;
- ask questions and sing; pick his teeth and sing. I know a
man
- that had this trick of melancholy sold a goodly manor for a
song.
COUNTESS.
- Let me see what he writes, and when he means to come.
[Opening a letter.]
CLOWN.
- I have no mind to Isbel since I was at court. Our old ling
- and our Isbels o' the country are nothing like your old ling
and
- your Isbels o' the court. The brains of my Cupid's knocked
out;
- and I begin to love, as an old man loves money, with no
stomach.
COUNTESS.
- What have we here?
CLOWN.
- E'en that you have there.
[Exit.]
COUNTESS.
- [Reads.] 'I have sent you a daughter-in-law; she hath
- recovered the king and undone me. I have wedded her, not
bedded
- her; and sworn to make the "not" eternal. You shall hear I am
run
- away: know it before the report come. If there be breadth
enough
- in the world, I will hold a long distance. My duty to you.
- Your unfortunate son,
- BERTRAM.'
- This is not well, rash and unbridled boy,
- To fly the favours of so good a king;
- To pluck his indignation on thy head
- By the misprizing of a maid too virtuous
- For the contempt of empire.
[Re-enter CLOWN.]
CLOWN.
- O madam, yonder is heavy news within between two soldiers and
my
- young lady.
COUNTESS.
- What is the matter?
CLOWN.
- Nay, there is some comfort in the news, some comfort; your
son
- will not be killed so soon as I thought he would.
COUNTESS.
- Why should he be killed?
CLOWN.
- So say I, madam, if he run away, as I hear he does: the danger
is
- in standing to 't; that's the loss of men, though it be
the
- getting of children. Here they come will tell you more: for
my
- part, I only hear your son was run away.
[Exit.]
[Enter HELENA and the two Gentlemen.]
SECOND GENTLEMAN.
- Save you, good madam.
HELENA.
- Madam, my lord is gone, for ever gone.
FIRST GENTLEMAN.
- Do not say so.
COUNTESS.
- Think upon patience.—Pray you, gentlemen,—
- I have felt so many quirks of joy and grief
- That the first face of neither, on the start,
- Can woman me unto 't.—Where is my son, I pray you?
FIRST GENTLEMAN.
- Madam, he's gone to serve the Duke of Florence:
- We met him thitherward; for thence we came,
- And, after some despatch in hand at court,
- Thither we bend again.
HELENA.
- Look on this letter, madam; here's my passport.
- [Reads.] 'When thou canst get the ring upon my finger,
which
- never shall come off, and show me a child begotten of thy
body
- that I am father to, then call me husband; but in such a "then"
I
- write a "never."
- This is a dreadful sentence.
COUNTESS.
- Brought you this letter, gentlemen?
FIRST GENTLEMAN.
- Ay, madam;
- And for the contents' sake, are sorry for our pains.
COUNTESS.
- I pr'ythee, lady, have a better cheer;
- If thou engrossest all the griefs are thine,
- Thou robb'st me of a moiety. He was my son:
- But I do wash his name out of my blood,
- And thou art all my child.—Towards Florence is he?
FIRST GENTLEMAN.
- Ay, madam.
COUNTESS.
- And to be a soldier?
FIRST GENTLEMAN.
- Such is his noble purpose: and, believe 't,
- The duke will lay upon him all the honour
- That good convenience claims.
COUNTESS.
- Return you thither?
SECOND GENTLEMAN.
- Ay, madam, with the swiftest wing of speed.
HELENA.
- [Reads.] 'Till I have no wife, I have nothing in France.'
- 'Tis bitter.
COUNTESS.
- Find you that there?
HELENA.
- Ay, madam.
SECOND GENTLEMAN.
- 'Tis but the boldness of his hand haply,
- Which his heart was not consenting to.
COUNTESS.
- Nothing in France until he have no wife!
- There's nothing here that is too good for him
- But only she; and she deserves a lord
- That twenty such rude boys might tend upon,
- And call her hourly mistress. Who was with him?
SECOND GENTLEMAN.
- A servant only, and a gentleman
- Which I have sometime known.
COUNTESS.
- Parolles, was it not?
SECOND GENTLEMAN.
- Ay, my good lady, he.
COUNTESS.
- A very tainted fellow, and full of wickedness.
- My son corrupts a well-derived nature
- With his inducement.
SECOND GENTLEMAN.
- Indeed, good lady,
- The fellow has a deal of that too much
- Which holds him much to have.
COUNTESS.
- You are welcome, gentlemen.
- I will entreat you, when you see my son,
- To tell him that his sword can never win
- The honour that he loses: more I'll entreat you
- Written to bear along.
FIRST GENTLEMAN.
- We serve you, madam,
- In that and all your worthiest affairs.
COUNTESS.
- Not so, but as we change our courtesies.
- Will you draw near?
[Exeunt COUNTESS and Gentlemen.]
HELENA.
- 'Till I have no wife, I have nothing in France.'
- Nothing in France until he has no wife!
- Thou shalt have none, Rousillon, none in France;
- Then hast thou all again. Poor lord! is't I
- That chase thee from thy country, and expose
- Those tender limbs of thine to the event
- Of the none-sparing war? and is it I
- That drive thee from the sportive court, where thou
- Wast shot at with fair eyes, to be the mark
- Of smoky muskets? O you leaden messengers,
- That ride upon the violent speed of fire,
- Fly with false aim: move the still-peering air,
- That sings with piercing; do not touch my lord!
- Whoever shoots at him, I set him there;
- Whoever charges on his forward breast,
- I am the caitiff that do hold him to it;
- And though I kill him not, I am the cause
- His death was so effected: better 'twere
- I met the ravin lion when he roar'd
- With sharp constraint of hunger; better 'twere
- That all the miseries which nature owes
- Were mine at once. No; come thou home, Rousillon,
- Whence honour but of danger wins a scar,
- As oft it loses all. I will be gone:
- My being here it is that holds thee hence:
- Shall I stay here to do't? no, no, although
- The air of paradise did fan the house,
- And angels offic'd all: I will be gone,
- That pitiful rumour may report my flight
- To consolate thine ear. Come, night; end, day!
- For with the dark, poor thief, I'll steal away.
[Exit.]
SCENE 3.
Florence. Before the DUKE's palace.
[Flourish. Enter the DUKE OF FLORENCE, BERTRAM, PAROLLES, Lords,
Soldiers, and others.]
DUKE.
- The general of our horse thou art; and we,
- Great in our hope, lay our best love and credence
- Upon thy promising fortune.
BERTRAM.
- Sir, it is
- A charge too heavy for my strength; but yet
- We'll strive to bear it, for your worthy sake
- To the extreme edge of hazard.
DUKE.
- Then go thou forth;
- And fortune play upon thy prosperous helm,
- As thy auspicious mistress!
BERTRAM.
- This very day,
- Great Mars, I put myself into thy file;
- Make me but like my thoughts, and I shall prove
- A lover of thy drum, hater of love.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE
4. Rousillon. A room in the COUNTESS'S palace.
[Enter COUNTESS and Steward.]
COUNTESS.
- Alas! and would you take the letter of her?
- Might you not know she would do as she has done,
- By sending me a letter? Read it again.
STEWARD.
- [Reads.]
- 'I am Saint Jaques' pilgrim, thither gone:
- Ambitious love hath so in me offended
- That barefoot plod I the cold ground upon,
- With sainted vow my faults to have amended.
- Write, write, that from the bloody course of war
- My dearest master, your dear son, may hie:
- Bless him at home in peace, whilst I from far
- His name with zealous fervour sanctify:
- His taken labours bid him me forgive;
- I, his despiteful Juno, sent him forth
- From courtly friends, with camping foes to live,
- Where death and danger dog the heels of worth:
- He is too good and fair for death and me;
- Whom I myself embrace to set him free.'
COUNTESS.
- Ah, what sharp stings are in her mildest words!—
- Rinaldo, you did never lack advice so much
- As letting her pass so; had I spoke with her,
- I could have well diverted her intents,
- Which thus she hath prevented.
STEWARD.
- Pardon me, madam:
- If I had given you this at over-night,
- She might have been o'er ta'en; and yet she writes,
- Pursuit would be but vain.
COUNTESS.
- What angel shall
- Bless this unworthy husband? he cannot thrive,
- Unless her prayers, whom heaven delights to hear
- And loves to grant, reprieve him from the wrath
- Of greatest justice.—Write, write, Rinaldo,
- To this unworthy husband of his wife:
- Let every word weigh heavy of her worth,
- That he does weigh too light: my greatest grief,
- Though little he do feel it, set down sharply.
- Dispatch the most convenient messenger:—
- When, haply, he shall hear that she is gone
- He will return; and hope I may that she,
- Hearing so much, will speed her foot again,
- Led hither by pure love: which of them both
- Is dearest to me I have no skill in sense
- To make distinction:—provide this messenger:—
- My heart is heavy, and mine age is weak;
- Grief would have tears, and sorrow bids me speak.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE 5. Without the
walls of Florence.
[Enter an old Widow of Florence, DIANA, VIOLENTA, MARIANA, and
other Citizens.]
WIDOW.
- Nay, come; for if they do approach the city we shall lose
- all the sight.
DIANA.
- They say the French count has done most honourable
service.
WIDOW.
- It is reported that he has taken their greatest commander;
- and that with his own hand he slew the duke's brother.
[A tucket afar off.]
- We have lost our labour; they are gone a contrary way: hark!
you
- may know by their trumpets.
MARIANA.
- Come, let's return again, and suffice ourselves with the
report
- of it. Well, Diana, take heed of this French earl: the honour
of
- a maid is her name; and no legacy is so rich as honesty.
WIDOW.
- I have told my neighbour how you have been solicited by a
- gentleman his companion.
MARIANA.
- I know that knave; hang him! one Parolles: a filthy officer he
is
- in those suggestions for the young earl.—Beware of them,
Diana;
- their promises, enticements, oaths, tokens, and all these
engines
- of lust, are not the things they go under; many a maid hath
been
- seduced by them; and the misery is, example, that so
terrible
- shows in the wreck of maidenhood, cannot for all that
dissuade
- succession, but that they are limed with the twigs that
threaten
- them. I hope I need not to advise you further; but I hope
your
- own grace will keep you where you are, though there were
no
- further danger known but the modesty which is so lost.
DIANA.
- You shall not need to fear me.
WIDOW.
- I hope so.—Look, here comes a pilgrim. I know she will lie
- at my house: thither they send one another; I'll question
her.—
[Enter HELENA in the dress of a pilgrim.]
- God save you, pilgrim! Whither are bound?
HELENA.
- To Saint Jaques-le-Grand.
- Where do the palmers lodge, I do beseech you?
WIDOW.
- At the Saint Francis here, beside the port.
HELENA.
- Is this the way?
WIDOW.
- Ay, marry, is't. Hark you! They come this way.
[A march afar off.]
- If you will tarry, holy pilgrim,
- But till the troops come by,
- I will conduct you where you shall be lodg'd;
- The rather for I think I know your hostess
- As ample as myself.
HELENA.
- Is it yourself?
WIDOW.
- If you shall please so, pilgrim.
HELENA.
- I thank you, and will stay upon your leisure.
WIDOW.
- You came, I think, from France?
HELENA.
- I did so.
WIDOW.
- Here you shall see a countryman of yours
- That has done worthy service.
HELENA.
- His name, I pray you.
DIANA.
- The Count Rousillon: know you such a one?
HELENA.
- But by the ear, that hears most nobly of him:
- His face I know not.
DIANA.
- Whatsoe'er he is,
- He's bravely taken here. He stole from France,
- As 'tis reported, for the king had married him
- Against his liking: think you it is so?
HELENA.
- Ay, surely, mere the truth; I know his lady.
DIANA.
- There is a gentleman that serves the count
- Reports but coarsely of her.
HELENA.
- What's his name?
DIANA.
- Monsieur Parolles.
HELENA.
- O, I believe with him,
- In argument of praise, or to the worth
- Of the great count himself, she is too mean
- To have her name repeated; all her deserving
- Is a reserved honesty, and that
- I have not heard examin'd.
DIANA.
- Alas, poor lady!
- 'Tis a hard bondage to become the wife
- Of a detesting lord.
WIDOW.
- Ay, right; good creature, wheresoe'er she is
- Her heart weighs sadly: this young maid might do her
- A shrewd turn, if she pleas'd.
HELENA.
- How do you mean?
- May be, the amorous count solicits her
- In the unlawful purpose.
WIDOW.
- He does, indeed;
- And brokes with all that can in such a suit
- Corrupt the tender honour of a maid;
- But she is arm'd for him, and keeps her guard
- In honestest defence.
- MARIANA.
- The gods forbid else!
WIDOW. So, now they come:—
[Enter, with a drum and colours, a party of the Florentine army,
BERTRAM, and PAROLLES.]
- That is Antonio, the Duke's eldest son;
- That, Escalus.
HELENA.
- Which is the Frenchman?
DIANA.
- He;
- That with the plume: 'tis a most gallant fellow.
- I would he lov'd his wife: if he were honester
- He were much goodlier: is't not a handsome gentleman?
HELENA.
- I like him well.
DIANA.
- 'Tis pity he is not honest? yond's that same knave
- That leads him to these places; were I his lady
- I would poison that vile rascal.
HELENA.
- Which is he?
DIANA.
- That jack-an-apes with scarfs. Why is he melancholy?
HELENA.
- Perchance he's hurt i' the battle.
PAROLLES.
- Lose our drum! well.
MARIANA.
- He's shrewdly vex'd at something.
- Look, he has spied us.
WIDOW.
- Marry, hang you!
MARIANA.
- And your courtesy, for a ring-carrier!
[Exeunt BERTRAM, PAROLLES, Officers, and Soldiers.]
WIDOW.
- The troop is past. Come, pilgrim, I will bring you
- Where you shall host: of enjoin'd penitents
- There's four or five, to great Saint Jaques bound,
- Already at my house.
HELENA.
- I humbly thank you:
- Please it this matron and this gentle maid
- To eat with us to-night; the charge and thanking
- Shall be for me: and, to requite you further,
- I will bestow some precepts of this virgin,
- Worthy the note.
BOTH.
- We'll take your offer kindly.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE 6. Camp before
Florence.
[Enter BERTRAM, and the two French Lords.]
FIRST LORD.
- Nay, good my lord, put him to't; let him have his way.
SECOND LORD.
- If your lordship find him not a hilding, hold me no more in
your
- respect.
FIRST LORD.
- On my life, my lord, a bubble.
BERTRAM.
- Do you think I am so far deceived in him?
FIRST LORD.
- Believe it, my lord, in mine own direct knowledge, without
any
- malice, but to speak of him as my kinsman, he's a most
notable
- coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly
promise-breaker,
- the owner of no one good quality worthy your lordship's
- entertainment.
SECOND LORD.
- It were fit you knew him; lest, reposing too far in his
virtue,
- which he hath not, he might at some great and trusty business,
in
- a main danger fail you.
BERTRAM.
- I would I knew in what particular action to try him.
SECOND LORD.
- None better than to let him fetch off his drum, which you
hear
- him so confidently undertake to do.
FIRST LORD.
- I with a troop of Florentines will suddenly surprise him; such
I
- will have whom I am sure he knows not from the enemy; we
will
- bind and hoodwink him so that he shall suppose no other but
that
- he is carried into the leaguer of the adversaries when we
bring
- him to our own tents. Be but your lordship present at his
- examination; if he do not, for the promise of his life, and
in
- the highest compulsion of base fear, offer to betray you,
and
- deliver all the intelligence in his power against you, and
that
- with the divine forfeit of his soul upon oath, never trust
my
- judgment in anything.
SECOND LORD.
- O, for the love of laughter, let him fetch his drum; he says
he
- has a stratagem for't: when your lordship sees the bottom of
his
- success in't, and to what metal this counterfeit lump of ore
will
- be melted, if you give him not John Drum's entertainment,
your
- inclining cannot be removed. Here he comes.
FIRST LORD.
- O, for the love of laughter, hinder not the honour of his
design:
- let him fetch off his drum in any hand.
[Enter PAROLLES.]
BERTRAM.
- How now, monsieur! this drum sticks sorely in your
disposition.
SECOND LORD.
- A pox on 't; let it go; 'tis but a drum.
PAROLLES.
- But a drum! Is't but a drum? A drum so lost!—There was
excellent
- command! to charge in with our horse upon our own wings, and
to
- rend our own soldiers.
SECOND LORD.
- That was not to be blamed in the command of the service; it was
a
- disaster of war that Caesar himself could not have prevented,
if
- he had been there to command.
BERTRAM.
- Well, we cannot greatly condemn our success: some dishonour
we
- had in the loss of that drum; but it is not to be
recovered.
PAROLLES.
- It might have been recovered.
BERTRAM.
- It might, but it is not now.
PAROLLES.
- It is to be recovered: but that the merit of service is
seldom
- attributed to the true and exact performer, I would have
that
- drum or another, or hic jacet.
BERTRAM.
- Why, if you have a stomach, to't, monsieur, if you think
your
- mystery in stratagem can bring this instrument of honour
again
- into his native quarter, be magnanimous in the enterprise, and
go
- on; I will grace the attempt for a worthy exploit; if you
speed
- well in it, the duke shall both speak of it and extend to
you
- what further becomes his greatness, even to the utmost
syllable
- of your worthiness.
PAROLLES.
- By the hand of a soldier, I will undertake it.
BERTRAM.
- But you must not now slumber in it.
PAROLLES.
- I'll about it this evening: and I will presently pen down
my
- dilemmas, encourage myself in my certainty, put myself into
my
- mortal preparation; and, by midnight, look to hear further
from
- me.
BERTRAM.
- May I be bold to acquaint his grace you are gone about it?
PAROLLES.
- I know not what the success will be, my lord, but the attempt
I
- vow.
BERTRAM.
- I know thou art valiant; and, to the possibility of thy
- soldiership, will subscribe for thee. Farewell.
PAROLLES.
- I love not many words.
[Exit.]
FIRST LORD.
- No more than a fish loves water.—Is not this a strange
fellow,
- my lord? that so confidently seems to undertake this
business,
- which he knows is not to be done; damns himself to do, and
dares
- better be damned than to do't.
SECOND LORD.
- You do not know him, my lord, as we do: certain it is that
he
- will steal himself into a man's favour, and for a week escape
a
- great deal of discoveries; but when you find him out, you
have
- him ever after.
BERTRAM.
- Why, do you think he will make no deed at all of this, that
so
- seriously he does address himself unto?
FIRST LORD.
- None in the world: but return with an invention, and clap
upon
- you two or three probable lies: but we have almost embossed
him,
- —you shall see his fall to-night: for indeed he is not for
your
- lordship's respect.
SECOND LORD.
- We'll make you some sport with the fox ere we case him. He
was
- first smok'd by the old Lord Lafeu: when his disguise and he
is
- parted, tell me what a sprat you shall find him; which you
shall
- see this very night.
FIRST LORD.
- I must go look my twigs; he shall be caught.
BERTRAM.
- Your brother, he shall go along with me.
FIRST LORD.
- As't please your lordship: I'll leave you.
[Exit.]
BERTRAM.
- Now will I lead you to the house, and show you
- The lass I spoke of.
SECOND LORD.
- But you say she's honest.
BERTRAM.
- That's all the fault: I spoke with her but once,
- And found her wondrous cold; but I sent to her,
- By this same coxcomb that we have i' the wind,
- Tokens and letters which she did re-send;
- And this is all I have done. She's a fair creature;
- Will you go see her?
SECOND LORD.
- With all my heart, my lord.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE 7.
Florence. A room in the WIDOW'S house.
[Enter HELENA and Widow.]
HELENA.
- If you misdoubt me that I am not she,
- I know not how I shall assure you further,
- But I shall lose the grounds I work upon.
WIDOW.
- Though my estate be fallen, I was well born,
- Nothing acquainted with these businesses;
- And would not put my reputation now
- In any staining act.
HELENA.
- Nor would I wish you.
- First give me trust, the count he is my husband,
- And what to your sworn counsel I have spoken
- Is so from word to word; and then you cannot,
- By the good aid that I of you shall borrow,
- Err in bestowing it.
WIDOW.
- I should believe you;
- For you have show'd me that which well approves
- You're great in fortune.
HELENA.
- Take this purse of gold,
- And let me buy your friendly help thus far,
- Which I will over-pay, and pay again
- When I have found it. The count he woos your daughter
- Lays down his wanton siege before her beauty,
- Resolv'd to carry her: let her in fine, consent,
- As we'll direct her how 'tis best to bear it,
- Now his important blood will naught deny
- That she'll demand: a ring the county wears,
- That downward hath succeeded in his house
- From son to son, some four or five descents
- Since the first father wore it: this ring he holds
- In most rich choice; yet, in his idle fire,
- To buy his will, it would not seem too dear,
- Howe'er repented after.
WIDOW.
- Now I see
- The bottom of your purpose.
HELENA.
- You see it lawful then: it is no more
- But that your daughter, ere she seems as won,
- Desires this ring; appoints him an encounter;
- In fine, delivers me to fill the time,
- Herself most chastely absent; after this,
- To marry her, I'll add three thousand crowns
- To what is pass'd already.
WIDOW.
- I have yielded:
- Instruct my daughter how she shall persever,
- That time and place, with this deceit so lawful,
- May prove coherent. Every night he comes
- With musics of all sorts, and songs compos'd
- To her unworthiness: it nothing steads us
- To chide him from our eaves; for he persists,
- As if his life lay on 't.
HELENA.
- Why, then, to-night
- Let us assay our plot; which, if it speed,
- Is wicked meaning in a lawful deed,
- And lawful meaning in a lawful act;
- Where both not sin, and yet a sinful fact:
- But let's about it.
[Exeunt.]
ACT IV.
SCENE 1. Without the
Florentine camp.
[Enter first Lord with five or six Soldiers in ambush.]
FIRST LORD.
- He can come no other way but by this hedge-corner. When you
sally
- upon him, speak what terrible language you will; though
you
- understand it not yourselves, no matter; for we must not seem
to
- understand him, unless some one among us, whom we must
produce
- for an interpreter.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Good captain, let me be the interpreter.
FIRST LORD.
- Art not acquainted with him? knows he not thy voice?
FIRST SOLDIER.
- No, sir, I warrant you.
FIRST LORD.
- But what linsey-woolsey has thou to speak to us again?
FIRST SOLDIER.
- E'en such as you speak to me.
FIRST LORD.
- He must think us some band of strangers i' the adversary's
- entertainment. Now he hath a smack of all neighbouring
languages,
- therefore we must every one be a man of his own fancy; not
to
- know what we speak one to another, so we seem to know, is to
know
- straight our purpose: choughs' language, gabble enough, and
good
- enough. As for you, interpreter, you must seem very politic.
But
- couch, ho! here he comes; to beguile two hours in a sleep,
and
- then to return and swear the lies he forges.
[Enter PAROLLES.]
PAROLLES.
- Ten o'clock. Within these three hours 'twill be time enough to
go
- home. What shall I say I have done? It must be a very
plausive
- invention that carries it ;they begin to smoke me: and
disgraces
- have of late knocked too often at my door. I find my tongue
is
- too foolhardy; but my heart hath the fear of Mars before it,
and
- of his creatures, not daring the reports of my tongue.
FIRST LORD. {Aside.]
- This is the first truth that e'er thine own tongue was guilty
of.
PAROLLES.
- What the devil should move me to undertake the recovery of
this
- drum: being not ignorant of the impossibility, and knowing I
had
- no such purpose? I must give myself some hurts, and say I
got
- them in exploit: yet slight ones will not carry it: they will
say
- Came you off with so little? and great ones I dare not
give.
- Wherefore, what's the instance? Tongue, I must put you into
a
- butter-woman's mouth, and buy myself another of Bajazet's
mule,
- if you prattle me into these perils.
FIRST LORD. {Aside.]
- Is it possible he should know what he is, and be that he
is?
PAROLLES.
- I would the cutting of my garments would serve the turn, or
the
- breaking of my Spanish sword.
FIRST LORD. {Aside.]
- We cannot afford you so.
PAROLLES.
- Or the baring of my beard; and to say it was in stratagem.
FIRST LORD. {Aside.]
- 'Twould not do.
PAROLLES.
- Or to drown my clothes, and say I was stripped.
FIRST LORD. {Aside.]
- Hardly serve.
PAROLLES.
- Though I swore I leap'd from the window of the citadel,—
FIRST LORD. {Aside.]
- How deep?
PAROLLES.
- Thirty fathom.
FIRST LORD. {Aside.]
- Three great oaths would scarce make that be believed.
PAROLLES.
- I would I had any drum of the enemy's; I would swear I
recovered
- it.
FIRST LORD. {Aside.]
- You shall hear one anon.
PAROLLES.
- A drum now of the enemy's!
[Alarum within.]
FIRST LORD.
- Throca movousus, cargo, cargo, cargo.
ALL.
- Cargo, cargo, cargo, villianda par corbo, cargo.
PAROLLES.
- O, ransom, ransom! Do not hide mine eyes.
[They seize and blindfold him.]
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Boskos thromuldo boskos.
PAROLLES.
- I know you are the Muskos' regiment,
- And I shall lose my life for want of language:
- If there be here German, or Dane, low Dutch,
- Italian, or French, let him speak to me;
- I'll discover that which shall undo the Florentine.
SECOND SOLDIER.
- Boskos vauvado:—I understand thee, and can speak thy
tongue.
- Kerelybonto:—Sir,
- Betake thee to thy faith, for seventeen poniards
- Are at thy bosom.
PAROLLES.
- O!
FIRST SOLDIER.
- O, pray, pray, pray!—
- Manka revania dulche.
FIRST LORD.
- Oscorbi dulchos volivorco.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- The General is content to spare thee yet;
- And, hoodwink'd as thou art, will lead thee on
- To gather from thee: haply thou mayst inform
- Something to save thy life.
PAROLLES.
- O, let me live,
- And all the secrets of our camp I'll show,
- Their force, their purposes: nay, I'll speak that
- Which you will wonder at.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- But wilt thou faithfully?
PAROLLES.
- If I do not, damn me.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Acordo linta.—
- Come on; thou art granted space.
[Exit, with PAROLLES guarded.]
FIRST LORD.
- Go, tell the Count Rousillon and my brother
- We have caught the woodcock, and will keep him muffled
- Till we do hear from them.
SECOND SOLDIER.
- Captain, I will.
FIRST LORD.
- 'A will betray us all unto ourselves;—
- Inform 'em that.
SECOND SOLDIER.
- So I will, sir.
FIRST LORD.
- Till then I'll keep him dark, and safely lock'd.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE 2.
Florence. A room in the WIDOW'S house.
[Enter BERTRAM and DIANA.]
BERTRAM.
- They told me that your name was Fontibell.
DIANA.
- No, my good lord, Diana.
BERTRAM.
- Titled goddess;
- And worth it, with addition! But, fair soul,
- In your fine frame hath love no quality?
- If the quick fire of youth light not your mind,
- You are no maiden, but a monument;
- When you are dead, you should be such a one
- As you are now, for you are cold and stern;
- And now you should be as your mother was
- When your sweet self was got.
DIANA.
- She then was honest.
BERTRAM.
- So should you be.
DIANA.
- No:
- My mother did but duty; such, my lord,
- As you owe to your wife.
BERTRAM.
- No more of that!
- I pr'ythee, do not strive against my vows:
- I was compell'd to her; but I love thee
- By love's own sweet constraint, and will for ever
- Do thee all rights of service.
DIANA.
- Ay, so you serve us
- Till we serve you; but when you have our roses
- You barely leave our thorns to prick ourselves,
- And mock us with our bareness.
BERTRAM.
- How have I sworn?
DIANA.
- 'Tis not the many oaths that makes the truth,
- But the plain single vow that is vow'd true.
- What is not holy, that we swear not by,
- But take the Highest to witness: then, pray you, tell me,
- If I should swear by Jove's great attributes
- I lov'd you dearly, would you believe my oaths
- When I did love you ill? This has no holding,
- To swear by him whom I protest to love
- That I will work against him: therefore your oaths
- Are words and poor conditions; but unseal'd,—
- At least in my opinion.
BERTRAM.
- Change it, change it;
- Be not so holy-cruel. Love is holy;
- And my integrity ne'er knew the crafts
- That you do charge men with. Stand no more off,
- But give thyself unto my sick desires,
- Who then recover: say thou art mine, and ever
- My love as it begins shall so persever.
DIANA.
- I see that men make hopes in such a case,
- That we'll forsake ourselves. Give me that ring.
BERTRAM.
- I'll lend it thee, my dear, but have no power
- To give it from me.
DIANA.
- Will you not, my lord?
BERTRAM.
- It is an honour 'longing to our house,
- Bequeathed down from many ancestors;
- Which were the greatest obloquy i' the world
- In me to lose.
DIANA.
- Mine honour's such a ring:
- My chastity's the jewel of our house,
- Bequeathed down from many ancestors;
- Which were the greatest obloquy i' the world
- In me to lose. Thus your own proper wisdom
- Brings in the champion honour on my part
- Against your vain assault.
BERTRAM.
- Here, take my ring:
- My house, mine honour, yea, my life, be thine,
- And I'll be bid by thee.
DIANA.
- When midnight comes, knock at my chamber-window;
- I'll order take my mother shall not hear.
- Now will I charge you in the band of truth,
- When you have conquer'd my yet maiden-bed,
- Remain there but an hour, nor speak to me:
- My reasons are most strong; and you shall know them
- When back again this ring shall be deliver'd;
- And on your finger in the night, I'll put
- Another ring; that what in time proceeds
- May token to the future our past deeds.
- Adieu till then; then fail not. You have won
- A wife of me, though there my hope be done.
BERTRAM.
- A heaven on earth I have won by wooing thee.
[Exit.]
DIANA.
- For which live long to thank both heaven and me!
- You may so in the end.—
- My mother told me just how he would woo,
- As if she sat in's heart; she says all men
- Have the like oaths: he had sworn to marry me
- When his wife's dead; therefore I'll lie with him
- When I am buried. Since Frenchmen are so braid,
- Marry that will, I live and die a maid:
- Only, in this disguise, I think't no sin
- To cozen him that would unjustly win.
[Exit.]
SCENE 3. The Florentine
camp.
[Enter the two French Lords, and two or three Soldiers.]
FIRST LORD.
- You have not given him his mother's letter?
SECOND LORD.
- I have deliv'red it an hour since: there is something in't
that
- stings his nature; for on the reading, it he changed almost
into
- another man.
FIRST LORD.
- He has much worthy blame laid upon him for shaking off so good
a
- wife and so sweet a lady.
SECOND LORD.
- Especially he hath incurred the everlasting displeasure of
the
- king, who had even tuned his bounty to sing happiness to him.
I
- will tell you a thing, but you shall let it dwell darkly
with
- you.
FIRST LORD.
- When you have spoken it, 'tis dead, and I am the grave of
it.
SECOND LORD.
- He hath perverted a young gentlewoman here in Florence, of a
most
- chaste renown; and this night he fleshes his will in the spoil
of
- her honour: he hath given her his monumental ring, and
thinks
- himself made in the unchaste composition.
FIRST LORD.
- Now, God delay our rebellion: as we are ourselves, what
things
- are we!
SECOND LORD.
- Merely our own traitors. And as in the common course of
all
- treasons, we still see them reveal themselves till they
attain
- to their abhorred ends; so he that in this action
contrives
- against his own nobility, in his proper stream, o'erflows
- himself.
FIRST LORD.
- Is it not meant damnable in us to be trumpeters of our
unlawful
- intents? We shall not then have his company to-night?
SECOND LORD.
- Not till after midnight; for he is dieted to his hour.
FIRST LORD.
- That approaches apace: I would gladly have him see his
- company anatomized, that he might take a measure of his
own
- judgments, wherein so curiously he had set this
counterfeit.
SECOND LORD.
- We will not meddle with him till he come; for his presence
must
- be the whip of the other.
FIRST LORD.
- In the meantime, what hear you of these wars?
SECOND LORD.
- I hear there is an overture of peace.
FIRST LORD.
- Nay, I assure you, a peace concluded.
SECOND LORD.
- What will Count Rousillon do then? will he travel higher,
or
- return again into France?
FIRST LORD.
- I perceive, by this demand, you are not altogether of his
- counsel.
SECOND LORD.
- Let it be forbid, sir: so should I be a great deal of his
act.
FIRST LORD.
- Sir, his wife, some two months since, fled from his house:
her
- pretence is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques-le-Grand: which
holy
- undertaking with most austere sanctimony she accomplished;
and,
- there residing, the tenderness of her nature became as a prey
to
- her grief; in fine, made a groan of her last breath; and now
she
- sings in heaven.
SECOND LORD.
- How is this justified?
FIRST LORD.
- The stronger part of it by her own letters, which makes her
story
- true, even to the point of her death: her death itself
which
- could not be her office to say is come, was faithfully
confirmed
- by the rector of the place.
SECOND LORD.
- Hath the count all this intelligence?
FIRST LORD.
- Ay, and the particular confirmations, point from point, to
the
- full arming of the verity.
SECOND LORD.
- I am heartily sorry that he'll be glad of this.
FIRST LORD.
- How mightily, sometimes, we make us comforts of our
losses!
SECOND LORD.
- And how mightily, some other times, we drown our gain in
tears!
- The great dignity that his valour hath here acquired for
him
- shall at home be encountered with a shame as ample.
FIRST LORD.
- The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and ill
together:
- our virtues would be proud if our faults whipped them not;
and
- our crimes would despair if they were not cherished by our
- virtues.—
[Enter a Servant.]
- How now? where's your master?
SERVANT.
- He met the duke in the street, sir; of whom he hath taken
- a solemn leave: his lordship will next morning for France.
The
- duke hath offered him letters of commendations to the
king.
SECOND LORD.
- They shall be no more than needful there, if they were more
than
- they can commend.
FIRST LORD.
- They cannot be too sweet for the king's tartness. Here's
his
- lordship now.
[Enter BERTRAM.]
- How now, my lord, is't not after midnight?
BERTRAM.
- I have to-night despatch'd sixteen businesses, a month's
length
- apiece; by an abstract of success: I have conge'd with the
duke,
- done my adieu with his nearest; buried a wife, mourned for
her;
- writ to my lady mother I am returning; entertained my convoy;
and
- between these main parcels of despatch effected many nicer
needs:
- the last was the greatest, but that I have not ended yet.
SECOND LORD.
- If the business be of any difficulty and this morning your
- departure hence, it requires haste of your lordship.
BERTRAM.
- I mean the business is not ended, as fearing to hear of it
- hereafter. But shall we have this dialogue between the fool
and
- the soldier?—Come, bring forth this counterfeit module has
- deceived me like a double-meaning prophesier.
SECOND LORD.
- Bring him forth.
[Exeunt Soldiers.]
- Has sat i' the stocks all night, poor gallant knave.
BERTRAM.
- No matter; his heels have deserved it, in usurping his
- spurs so long. How does he carry himself?
FIRST LORD.
- I have told your lordship already; the stocks carry him. But
to
- answer you as you would be understood: he weeps like a wench
that
- had shed her milk; he hath confessed himself to Morgan, whom
he
- supposes to be a friar, from the time of his remembrance to
this
- very instant disaster of his setting i' the stocks: and
what
- think you he hath confessed?
BERTRAM.
- Nothing of me, has he?
SECOND LORD.
- His confession is taken, and it shall be read to his face;
if
- your lordship be in't, as I believe you are, you must have
the
- patience to hear it.
[Re-enter Soldiers, with PAROLLES.]
BERTRAM.
- A plague upon him! muffled! he can say nothing of me; hush,
hush!
- FIRST LORD.
- Hoodman comes! Porto tartarossa.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- He calls for the tortures: what will you say without 'em?
PAROLLES.
- I will confess what I know without constraint; if ye pinch
me
- like a pasty I can say no more.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Bosko chimurcho.
FIRST LORD.
- Boblibindo chicurmurco.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- You are a merciful general:—Our general bids you answer to
what
- I shall ask you out of a note.
PAROLLES.
- And truly, as I hope to live.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- 'First demand of him how many horse the duke is strong.' What
say
- you to that?
PAROLLES.
- Five or six thousand; but very weak and unserviceable: the
troops
- are all scattered, and the commanders very poor rogues, upon
my
- reputation and credit, and as I hope to live.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Shall I set down your answer so?
PAROLLES.
- Do; I'll take the sacrament on 't, how and which way you
will.
BERTRAM.
- All's one to him. What a past-saving slave is this!
FIRST LORD.
- You are deceived, my lord; this is Monsieur Parolles, the
gallant
- militarist (that was his own phrase),that had the whole
theoric
- of war in the knot of his scarf, and the practice in the chape
of
- his dagger.
SECOND LORD.
- I will never trust a man again for keeping his sword clean;
nor
- believe he can have everything in him by wearing his
apparel
- neatly.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Well, that's set down.
PAROLLES.
- 'Five or six thousand horse' I said—I will say true—or
- thereabouts, set down,—for I'll speak truth.
FIRST LORD.
- He's very near the truth in this.
BERTRAM.
- But I con him no thanks for't in the nature he delivers
it.
PAROLLES.
- Poor rogues, I pray you say.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Well, that's set down.
PAROLLES.
- I humbly thank you, sir: a truth's a truth, the rogues are
- marvellous poor.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- 'Demand of him of what strength they are a-foot.' What say you
to
- that?
PAROLLES.
- By my troth, sir, if I were to live this present hour, I
will
- tell true. Let me see: Spurio, a hundred and fifty, Sebastian,
so
- many; Corambus, so many; Jaques, so many; Guiltian, Cosmo,
- Lodowick, and Gratii, two hundred fifty each; mine own
company,
- Chitopher, Vaumond, Bentii, two hundred fifty each: so that
the
- muster-file, rotten and sound, upon my life, amounts not
to
- fifteen thousand poll; half of the which dare not shake the
snow
- from off their cassocks lest they shake themselves to
pieces.
BERTRAM.
- What shall be done to him?
FIRST LORD.
- Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him my condition,
and
- what credit I have with the duke.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Well, that's set down. 'You shall demand of him whether
one
- Captain Dumain be i' the camp, a Frenchman; what his
reputation
- is with the duke, what his valour, honesty, expertness in
wars;
- or whether he thinks it were not possible, with
well-weighing
- sums of gold, to corrupt him to a revolt.'
- What say you to this? what do you know of it?
PAROLLES.
- I beseech you, let me answer to the particular of the
- inter'gatories: demand them singly.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Do you know this Captain Dumain?
PAROLLES.
- I know him: he was a botcher's 'prentice in Paris, from whence
he
- was whipped for getting the shrieve's fool with child: a
dumb
- innocent that could not say him nay.
[FIRST LORD lifts up his hand in anger.]
BERTRAM.
- Nay, by your leave, hold your hands; though I know his brains
are
- forfeit to the next tile that falls.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Well, is this captain in the Duke of Florence's camp?
PAROLLES.
- Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy.
FIRST LORD.
- Nay, look not so upon me; we shall hear of your lordship
anon.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- What is his reputation with the duke?
PAROLLES.
- The duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of mine;
and
- writ to me this other day to turn him out o' the band: I think
I
- have his letter in my pocket.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Marry, we'll search.
PAROLLES.
- In good sadness, I do not know; either it is there or it is
upon
- a file, with the duke's other letters, in my tent.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Here 'tis; here's a paper. Shall I read it to you?
PAROLLES.
- I do not know if it be it or no.
BERTRAM.
- Our interpreter does it well.
FIRST LORD.
- Excellently.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- [Reads.] 'Dian, the Count's a fool, and full of gold,—'
PAROLLES.
- That is not the duke's letter, sir; that is an advertisement to
a
- proper maid in Florence, one Diana, to take heed of the
- allurement of one Count Rousillon, a foolish idle boy, but
for
- all that very ruttish: I pray you, sir, put it up again.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- Nay, I'll read it first by your favour.
PAROLLES.
- My meaning in't, I protest, was very honest in the behalf of
the
- maid; for I knew the young count to be a dangerous and
lascivious
- boy, who is a whale to virginity, and devours up all the fry
it
- finds.
BERTRAM.
- Damnable! both sides rogue!
FIRST SOLDIER.
- [Reads.]
- 'When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it:
- After he scores, he never pays the score;
- Half won is match well made; match, and well make it;
- He ne'er pays after-debts, take it before;
- And say a soldier, 'Dian,' told thee this:
- Men are to mell with, boys are not to kiss;
- For count of this, the count's a fool, I know it,
- Who pays before, but not when he does owe it.
- Thine, as he vow'd to thee in thine ear,
- PAROLLES.
BERTRAM.
- He shall be whipped through the army with this rhyme in
his
- forehead.
SECOND LORD.
- This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifold linguist, and
the
- armipotent soldier.
BERTRAM.
- I could endure anything before but a cat, and now he's a cat
to
- me.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- I perceive, sir, by our general's looks we shall be fain to
hang
- you.
PAROLLES.
- My life, sir, in any case: not that I am afraid to die, but
that,
- my offences being many, I would repent out the remainder
of
- nature: let me live, sir, in a dungeon, i' the stocks, or
- anywhere, so I may live.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- We'll see what may be done, so you confess freely;
therefore,
- once more to this Captain Dumain: you have answered to his
- reputation with the duke, and to his valour: what is his
honesty?
PAROLLES.
- He will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister: for rapes
and
- ravishments he parallels Nessus. He professes not keeping
of
- oaths; in breaking them he is stronger than Hercules. He
will
- lie, sir, with such volubility that you would think truth were
a
- fool: drunkenness is his best virtue, for he will be
swine-drunk;
- and in his sleep he does little harm, save to his
bedclothes
- about him; but they know his conditions and lay him in straw.
I
- have but little more to say, sir, of his honesty; he has
- everything that an honest man should not have; what an honest
man
- should have he has nothing.
FIRST LORD.
- I begin to love him for this.
BERTRAM.
- For this description of thine honesty? A pox upon him for
me;
- he's more and more a cat.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- What say you to his expertness in war?
PAROLLES.
- Faith, sir, has led the drum before the English
tragedians,—to
- belie him I will not,—and more of his soldiership I know
not,
- except in that country he had the honour to be the officer at
a
- place there called Mile-end to instruct for the doubling
of
- files: I would do the man what honour I can, but of this I am
not
- certain.
FIRST LORD.
- He hath out-villanied villainy so far that the rarity
redeems
- him.
BERTRAM.
- A pox on him! he's a cat still.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- His qualities being at this poor price, I need not to ask you
if
- gold will corrupt him to revolt.
PAROLLES.
- Sir, for a quart d'ecu he will sell the fee-simple of his
- salvation, the inheritance of it; and cut the entail from
all
- remainders and a perpetual succession for it perpetually.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- What's his brother, the other Captain Dumain?
SECOND LORD.
- Why does he ask him of me?
FIRST SOLDIER.
- What's he?
PAROLLES.
- E'en a crow o' the same nest; not altogether so great as
the
- first in goodness, but greater a great deal in evil. He
excels
- his brother for a coward, yet his brother is reputed one of
the
- best that is; in a retreat he outruns any lackey: marry,
in
- coming on he has the cramp.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- If your life be saved, will you undertake to betray the
- Florentine?
PAROLLES.
- Ay, and the captain of his horse, Count Rousillon.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- I'll whisper with the general, and know his pleasure.
PAROLLES.
- [Aside.] I'll no more drumming; a plague of all drums! Only
to
- seem to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of
that
- lascivious young boy the count, have I run into this danger:
yet
- who would have suspected an ambush where I was taken?
FIRST SOLDIER.
- There is no remedy, sir, but you must die: the general says
you
- that have so traitorously discovered the secrets of your
army,
- and made such pestiferous reports of men very nobly held,
can
- serve the world for no honest use; therefore you must die.
Come,
- headsman, off with his head.
PAROLLES.
- O Lord! sir, let me live, or let me see my death.
FIRST SOLDIER.
- That shall you, and take your leave of all your friends.
[Unmuffling him.]
- So look about you; know you any here?
BERTRAM.
- Good morrow, noble captain.
SECOND LORD.
- God bless you, Captain Parolles.
FIRST LORD.
- God save you, noble captain.
SECOND LORD.
- Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafeu? I am for
- France.
FIRST LORD.
- Good Captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet you writ
to
- Diana in behalf of the Count Rousillon? an I were not a
very
- coward I'd compel it of you; but fare you well.
[Exeunt BERTRAM, Lords, &c.]
FIRST SOLDIER.
- You are undone, captain: all but your scarf; that has a knot
on't
- yet.
PAROLLES.
- Who cannot be crushed with a plot?
FIRST SOLDIER.
- If you could find out a country where but women were that
had
- received so much shame, you might begin an impudent nation.
Fare
- ye well, sir; I am for France too: we shall speak of you
there.
[Exit.]
PAROLLES.
- Yet am I thankful: if my heart were great,
- 'Twould burst at this. Captain I'll be no more;
- But I will eat, and drink, and sleep as soft
- As captain shall: simply the thing I am
- Shall make me live. Who knows himself a braggart,
- Let him fear this; for it will come to pass
- That every braggart shall be found an ass.
- Rust, sword! cool, blushes! and, Parolles, live
- Safest in shame! being fool'd, by foolery thrive.
- There's place and means for every man alive.
- I'll after them.
[Exit.]
SCENE 4.
Florence. A room in the Widow's house.
[Enter HELENA, Widow, and DIANA.]
HELENA.
- That you may well perceive I have not wrong'd you!
- One of the greatest in the Christian world
- Shall be my surety; 'fore whose throne 'tis needful,
- Ere I can perfect mine intents, to kneel:
- Time was I did him a desired office,
- Dear almost as his life; which gratitude
- Through flinty Tartar's bosom would peep forth,
- And answer, thanks: I duly am informed
- His grace is at Marseilles; to which place
- We have convenient convoy. You must know
- I am supposed dead: the army breaking,
- My husband hies him home; where, heaven aiding,
- And by the leave of my good lord the king,
- We'll be before our welcome.
WIDOW.
- Gentle madam,
- You never had a servant to whose trust
- Your business was more welcome.
HELENA.
- Nor you, mistress,
- Ever a friend whose thoughts more truly labour
- To recompense your love: doubt not but heaven
- Hath brought me up to be your daughter's dower,
- As it hath fated her to be my motive
- And helper to a husband. But, O strange men!
- That can such sweet use make of what they hate,
- When saucy trusting of the cozen'd thoughts
- Defiles the pitchy night! so lust doth play
- With what it loathes, for that which is away:
- But more of this hereafter.—You, Diana,
- Under my poor instructions yet must suffer
- Something in my behalf.
DIANA.
- Let death and honesty
- Go with your impositions, I am yours
- Upon your will to suffer.
HELENA.
- Yet, I pray you:
- But with the word the time will bring on summer,
- When briers shall have leaves as well as thorns,
- And be as sweet as sharp. We must away;
- Our waggon is prepar'd, and time revives us:
- All's well that ends well: still the fine's the crown;
- Whate'er the course, the end is the renown.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE
5. Rousillon. A room in the COUNTESS'S palace.
[Enter COUNTESS, LAFEU, and CLOWN.]
LAFEU.
- No, no, no, son was misled with a snipt-taffeta fellow
there,
- whose villanous saffron would have made all the unbaked
and
- doughy youth of a nation in his colour: your
daughter-in-law
- had been alive at this hour, and your son here at home,
more
- advanced by the king than by that red-tail'd humble-bee I
speak
- of.
COUNTESS.
- I would I had not known him! It was the death of the most
- virtuous gentlewoman that ever nature had praise for creating:
if
- she had partaken of my flesh, and cost me the dearest groans of
a
- mother, I could not have owed her a more rooted love.
LAFEU.
- 'Twas a good lady, 'twas a good lady: we may pick a
thousand
- salads ere we light on such another herb.
CLOWN.
- Indeed, sir, she was the sweet marjoram of the salad, or,
- rather, the herb of grace.
LAFEU.
- They are not salad-herbs, you knave; they are nose-herbs.
CLOWN.
- I am no great Nebuchadnezzar, sir; I have not much skill
in
- grass.
LAFEU.
- Whether dost thou profess thyself,—a knave or a fool?
CLOWN.
- A fool, sir, at a woman's service, and a knave at a man's.
LAFEU.
- Your distinction?
CLOWN.
- I would cozen the man of his wife, and do his service.
LAFEU.
- So you were a knave at his service, indeed.
CLOWN.
- And I would give his wife my bauble, sir, to do her
service.
LAFEU.
- I will subscribe for thee; thou art both knave and fool.
CLOWN.
- At your service.
LAFEU.
- No, no, no.
CLOWN.
- Why, sir, if I cannot serve you, I can serve as great a
- prince as you are.
LAFEU.
- Who's that? a Frenchman?
CLOWN.
- Faith, sir, 'a has an English name; but his phisnomy is
more
- hotter in France than there.
LAFEU.
- What prince is that?
CLOWN.
- The black prince, sir; alias, the prince of darkness;
alias,
- the devil.
LAFEU.
- Hold thee, there's my purse: I give thee not this to
suggest
- thee from thy master thou talkest of; serve him still.
CLOWN.
- I am a woodland fellow, sir, that always loved a great
fire;
- and the master I speak of ever keeps a good fire. But, sure,
he
- is the prince of the world; let his nobility remain in his
court.
- I am for the house with the narrow gate, which I take to be
too
- little for pomp to enter: some that humble themselves may;
but
- the many will be too chill and tender; and they'll be for
the
- flow'ry way that leads to the broad gate and the great
fire.
LAFEU.
- Go thy ways, I begin to be a-weary of thee; and I tell
thee
- so before, because I would not fall out with thee. Go thy
ways;
- let my horses be well looked to, without any tricks.
CLOWN.
- If I put any tricks upon 'em, sir, they shall be jades'
tricks,
- which are their own right by the law of nature.
[Exit.]
LAFEU.
- A shrewd knave, and an unhappy.
COUNTESS.
- So he is. My lord that's gone made himself much sport out of
him;
- by his authority he remains here, which he thinks is a patent
for
- his sauciness; and indeed he has no pace, but runs where he
will.
LAFEU.
- I like him well; 'tis not amiss. And I was about to tell
you,
- since I heard of the good lady's death, and that my lord your
son
- was upon his return home, I moved the king my master to speak
in
- the behalf of my daughter; which, in the minority of them
both,
- his majesty out of a self-gracious remembrance did first
propose:
- His highness hath promised me to do it; and, to stop up
the
- displeasure he hath conceived against your son, there is
no
- fitter matter. How does your ladyship like it?
COUNTESS.
- With very much content, my lord; and I wish it happily
effected.
LAFEU.
- His highness comes post from Marseilles, of as able body
as
- when he numbered thirty; he will be here to-morrow, or I
am
- deceived by him that in such intelligence hath seldom
failed.
COUNTESS.
- It rejoices me that I hope I shall see him ere I die. I
have
- letters that my son will be here to-night: I shall beseech
- your lordship to remain with me till they meet together.
LAFEU.
- Madam, I was thinking with what manners I might safely be
- admitted.
COUNTESS.
- You need but plead your honourable privilege.
LAFEU.
- Lady, of that I have made a bold charter; but, I thank my
- God, it holds yet.
[Re-enter CLOWN.]
CLOWN.
- O madam, yonder's my lord your son with a patch of velvet
- on's face; whether there be a scar under it or no, the
velvet
- knows; but 'tis a goodly patch of velvet: his left cheek is
a
- cheek of two pile and a half, but his right cheek is worn
bare.
LAFEU.
- A scar nobly got, or a noble scar, is a good livery of honour;
so
- belike is that.
CLOWN.
- But it is your carbonadoed face.
LAFEU.
- Let us go see your son, I pray you; I long to talk with the
young
- noble soldier.
CLOWN.
- Faith, there's a dozen of 'em, with delicate fine hats,
and
- most courteous feathers, which bow the head and nod at every
man.
[Exeunt.]
ACT V.
SCENE 1. Marseilles. A
street.
[Enter HELENA, Widow, and DIANA, with two Attendants.]
HELENA.
- But this exceeding posting day and night
- Must wear your spirits low: we cannot help it.
- But since you have made the days and nights as one,
- To wear your gentle limbs in my affairs,
- Be bold you do so grow in my requital
- As nothing can unroot you. In happy time;—
[Enter a GENTLEMAN.]
- This man may help me to his majesty's ear,
- If he would spend his power.—God save you, sir.
GENTLEMAN.
- And you.
HELENA.
- Sir, I have seen you in the court of France.
GENTLEMAN.
- I have been sometimes there.
HELENA.
- I do presume, sir, that you are not fallen
- From the report that goes upon your goodness;
- And therefore, goaded with most sharp occasions,
- Which lay nice manners by, I put you to
- The use of your own virtues, for the which
- I shall continue thankful.
GENTLEMAN.
- What's your will?
HELENA.
- That it will please you
- To give this poor petition to the king;
- And aid me with that store of power you have
- To come into his presence.
GENTLEMAN.
- The king's not here.
HELENA.
- Not here, sir?
GENTLEMAN.
- Not indeed.
- He hence remov'd last night, and with more haste
- Than is his use.
WIDOW.
- Lord, how we lose our pains!
HELENA.
- All's well that ends well yet,
- Though time seem so adverse and means unfit.
- I do beseech you, whither is he gone?
GENTLEMAN.
- Marry, as I take it, to Rousillon;
- Whither I am going.
HELENA.
- I do beseech you, sir,
- Since you are like to see the king before me,
- Commend the paper to his gracious hand;
- Which I presume shall render you no blame,
- But rather make you thank your pains for it:
- I will come after you with what good speed
- Our means will make us means.
GENTLEMAN.
- This I'll do for you.
HELENA.
- And you shall find yourself to be well thank'd,
- Whate'er falls more.—We must to horse again;—
- Go, go, provide.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE 2. Rousillon. The inner court of the COUNTESS'S
palace.
[Enter CLOWN and PAROLLES.]
PAROLLES.
- Good Monsieur Lavache, give my Lord Lafeu this letter: I
have
- ere now, sir, been better known to you, when I have held
- familiarity with fresher clothes; but I am now, sir, muddied
in
- fortune's mood, and smell somewhat strong of her strong
- displeasure.
CLOWN.
- Truly, Fortune's displeasure is but sluttish, if it smell
- so strongly as thou speak'st of: I will henceforth eat no
fish
- of fortune's buttering. Pr'ythee, allow the wind.
PAROLLES.
- Nay, you need not to stop your nose, sir; I spake but by a
- metaphor.
CLOWN.
- Indeed, sir, if your metaphor stink, I will stop my nose;
or
- against any man's metaphor. Pr'ythee, get thee further.
PAROLLES.
- Pray you, sir, deliver me this paper.
CLOWN.
- Foh, pr'ythee stand away. A paper from Fortune's
close-stool
- to give to a nobleman! Look here he comes himself.
[Enter LAFEU.]
- Here is a pur of fortune's, sir, or of fortune's cat (but
not
- a musk-cat), that has fallen into the unclean fishpond of
her
- displeasure, and, as he says, is muddied withal: pray you,
sir,
- use the carp as you may; for he looks like a poor,
decayed,
- ingenious, foolish, rascally knave. I do pity his distress
- in my similes of comfort, and leave him to your lordship.
[Exit.]
PAROLLES.
- My lord, I am a man whom fortune hath cruelly scratched.
LAFEU.
- And what would you have me to do? 'tis too late to pare
her
- nails now. Wherein have you played the knave with fortune,
that
- she should scratch you, who of herself is a good lady, and
would
- not have knaves thrive long under her? There's a quart d'ecu
for
- you: let the justices make you and fortune friends; I am
for
- other business.
PAROLLES.
- I beseech your honour to hear me one single word.
LAFEU.
- You beg a single penny more: come, you shall ha't: save
your
- word.
PAROLLES.
- My name, my good lord, is Parolles.
LAFEU.
- You beg more than word then.—Cox' my passion! give me your
- hand:—how does your drum?
PAROLLES.
- O my good lord, you were the first that found me.
LAFEU.
- Was I, in sooth? and I was the first that lost thee.
PAROLLES.
- It lies in you, my lord, to bring me in some grace, for
- you did bring me out.
LAFEU.
- Out upon thee, knave! dost thou put upon me at once both
the
- office of God and the devil? one brings the in grace, and
the
- other brings thee out.
[Trumpets sound.]
- The king's coming; I know by his trumpets.—Sirrah, inquire
- further after me; I had talk of you last night: though you are
a
- fool and a knave, you shall eat: go to; follow.
PAROLLES.
- I praise God for you.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE 3.
The same. A room in the COUNTESS'S palace.
[Flourish. Enter KING, COUNTESS, LAFEU, Lords, Gentlemen,
Guards, &c.]
KING.
- We lost a jewel of her; and our esteem
- Was made much poorer by it: but your son,
- As mad in folly, lack'd the sense to know
- Her estimation home.
COUNTESS.
- 'Tis past, my liege:
- And I beseech your majesty to make it
- Natural rebellion, done i' the blaze of youth,
- When oil and fire, too strong for reason's force,
- O'erbears it and burns on.
KING.
- My honour'd lady,
- I have forgiven and forgotten all;
- Though my revenges were high bent upon him,
- And watch'd the time to shoot.
LAFEU.
- This I must say,—
- But first, I beg my pardon,—the young lord
- Did to his majesty, his mother, and his lady,
- Offence of mighty note; but to himself
- The greatest wrong of all: he lost a wife
- Whose beauty did astonish the survey
- Of richest eyes; whose words all ears took captive;
- Whose dear perfection hearts that scorn'd to serve
- Humbly call'd mistress.
KING.
- Praising what is lost
- Makes the remembrance dear.—Well, call him hither;—
- We are reconcil'd, and the first view shall kill
- All repetition:—let him not ask our pardon;
- The nature of his great offence is dead,
- And deeper than oblivion do we bury
- Th' incensing relics of it; let him approach,
- A stranger, no offender; and inform him,
- So 'tis our will he should.
GENTLEMAN.
- I shall, my liege.
[Exit Gentleman.]
KING.
- What says he to your daughter? have you spoke?
LAFEU.
- All that he is hath reference to your highness.
KING.
- Then shall we have a match. I have letters sent me
- That sets him high in fame.
[Enter BERTRAM.]
LAFEU.
- He looks well on 't.
KING.
- I am not a day of season,
- For thou mayst see a sunshine and a hail
- In me at once: but to the brightest beams
- Distracted clouds give way; so stand thou forth;
- The time is fair again.
BERTRAM.
- My high-repented blames,
- Dear sovereign, pardon to me.
KING.
- All is whole;
- Not one word more of the consumed time.
- Let's take the instant by the forward top;
- For we are old, and on our quick'st decrees
- The inaudible and noiseless foot of time
- Steals ere we can effect them. You remember
- The daughter of this lord?
BERTRAM.
- Admiringly, my liege: at first
- I stuck my choice upon her, ere my heart
- Durst make too bold herald of my tongue:
- Where the impression of mine eye infixing,
- Contempt his scornful perspective did lend me,
- Which warp'd the line of every other favour;
- Scorned a fair colour, or express'd it stolen;
- Extended or contracted all proportions
- To a most hideous object: thence it came
- That she whom all men prais'd, and whom myself,
- Since I have lost, have lov'd, was in mine eye
- The dust that did offend it.
KING.
- Well excus'd:
- That thou didst love her, strikes some scores away
- From the great compt: but love that comes too late,
- Like a remorseful pardon slowly carried,
- To the great sender turns a sour offence,
- Crying, That's good that's gone. Our rash faults
- Make trivial price of serious things we have,
- Not knowing them until we know their grave:
- Oft our displeasures, to ourselves unjust,
- Destroy our friends, and after weep their dust:
- Our own love waking cries to see what's done,
- While shameful hate sleeps out the afternoon.
- Be this sweet Helen's knell, and now forget her.
- Send forth your amorous token for fair Maudlin:
- The main consents are had; and here we'll stay
- To see our widower's second marriage-day.
COUNTESS.
- Which better than the first, O dear heaven, bless!
- Or, ere they meet, in me, O nature, cesse!
LAFEU.
- Come on, my son, in whom my house's name
- Must be digested, give a favour from you,
- To sparkle in the spirits of my daughter,
- That she may quickly come.—
[BERTRAM gives a ring to Lafeu.]
- By my old beard,
- And every hair that's on 't, Helen, that's dead,
- Was a sweet creature: such a ring as this,
- The last that e'er I took her leave at court,
- I saw upon her finger.
BERTRAM.
- Hers it was not.
KING.
- Now, pray you, let me see it; for mine eye,
- While I was speaking, oft was fasten'd to it.—
- This ring was mine; and when I gave it Helen
- I bade her, if her fortunes ever stood
- Necessitied to help, that by this token
- I would relieve her. Had you that craft to 'reave her
- Of what should stead her most?
BERTRAM.
- My gracious sovereign,
- Howe'er it pleases you to take it so,
- The ring was never hers.
COUNTESS.
- Son, on my life,
- I have seen her wear it; and she reckon'd it
- At her life's rate.
LAFEU.
- I am sure I saw her wear it.
BERTRAM.
- You are deceiv'd, my lord; she never saw it:
- In Florence was it from a casement thrown me,
- Wrapp'd in a paper, which contain'd the name
- Of her that threw it: noble she was, and thought
- I stood engag'd: but when I had subscrib'd
- To mine own fortune, and inform'd her fully
- I could not answer in that course of honour
- As she had made the overture, she ceas'd,
- In heavy satisfaction, and would never
- Receive the ring again.
KING.
- Plutus himself,
- That knows the tinct and multiplying medicine,
- Hath not in nature's mystery more science
- Than I have in this ring: 'twas mine, 'twas Helen's,
- Whoever gave it you. Then, if you know
- That you are well acquainted with yourself,
- Confess 'twas hers, and by what rough enforcement
- You got it from her: she call'd the saints to surety
- That she would never put it from her finger
- Unless she gave it to yourself in bed,—
- Where you have never come,—or sent it us
- Upon her great disaster.
BERTRAM.
- She never saw it.
KING.
- Thou speak'st it falsely, as I love mine honour;
- And mak'st conjectural fears to come into me
- Which I would fain shut out. If it should prove
- That thou art so inhuman,—'twill not prove so:—
- And yet I know not:—thou didst hate her deadly.
- And she is dead; which nothing, but to close
- Her eyes myself, could win me to believe
- More than to see this ring.—Take him away.
[Guards seize BERTRAM.]
- My fore-past proofs, howe'er the matter fall,
- Shall tax my fears of little vanity,
- Having vainly fear'd too little.—Away with him;—
- We'll sift this matter further.
BERTRAM.
- If you shall prove
- This ring was ever hers, you shall as easy
- Prove that I husbanded her bed in Florence,
- Where she yet never was.
[Exit, guarded.]
KING.
- I am wrapp'd in dismal thinkings.
[Enter a Gentleman.]
GENTLEMAN.
- Gracious sovereign,
- Whether I have been to blame or no, I know not:
- Here's a petition from a Florentine,
- Who hath, for four or five removes, come short
- To tender it herself. I undertook it,
- Vanquish'd thereto by the fair grace and speech
- Of the poor suppliant, who by this, I know,
- Is here attending: her business looks in her
- With an importing visage; and she told me
- In a sweet verbal brief, it did concern
- Your highness with herself.
KING.
- [Reads.] 'Upon his many protestations to marry me, when his
wife
- was dead, I blush to say it, he won me. Now is the count
- Rousillon a widower; his vows are forfeited to me, and my
- honour's paid to him. He stole from Florence, taking no
leave,
- and I follow him to his country for justice: grant it me, O
king;
- in you it best lies; otherwise a seducer flourishes, and a
poor
- maid is undone.
- DIANA CAPULET.'
LAFEU.
- I will buy me a son-in-law in a fair, and toll this: I'll none
of
- him.
KING.
- The heavens have thought well on thee, Lafeu,
- To bring forth this discovery.—Seek these suitors:—
- Go speedily, and bring again the count.
[Exeunt Gentleman, and some Attendants.]
- I am afeard the life of Helen, lady,
- Was foully snatch'd.
COUNTESS.
- Now, justice on the doers!
[Enter BERTRAM, guarded.]
KING.
- I wonder, sir, since wives are monsters to you.
- And that you fly them as you swear them lordship,
- Yet you desire to marry.—What woman's that?
[Re-enter Widow and DIANA.]
DIANA.
- I am, my lord, a wretched Florentine,
- Derived from the ancient Capulet;
- My suit, as I do understand, you know,
- And therefore know how far I may be pitied.
WIDOW.
- I am her mother, sir, whose age and honour
- Both suffer under this complaint we bring,
- And both shall cease, without your remedy.
KING.
- Come hither, count; do you know these women?
BERTRAM.
- My lord, I neither can nor will deny
- But that I know them: do they charge me further?
DIANA.
- Why do you look so strange upon your wife?
BERTRAM.
- She's none of mine, my lord.
DIANA.
- If you shall marry,
- You give away this hand, and that is mine;
- You give away heaven's vows, and those are mine;
- You give away myself, which is known mine;
- For I by vow am so embodied yours
- That she which marries you must marry me,
- Either both or none.
LAFEU.
- [To BERTRAM] Your reputation comes too short for
- my daughter; you are no husband for her.
BERTRAM.
- My lord, this is a fond and desperate creature
- Whom sometime I have laugh'd with: let your highness
- Lay a more noble thought upon mine honour
- Than for to think that I would sink it here.
KING.
- Sir, for my thoughts, you have them ill to friend
- Till your deeds gain them: fairer prove your honour
- Than in my thought it lies!
DIANA.
- Good my lord,
- Ask him upon his oath, if he does think
- He had not my virginity.
KING.
- What say'st thou to her?
BERTRAM.
- She's impudent, my lord;
- And was a common gamester to the camp.
DIANA.
- He does me wrong, my lord; if I were so
- He might have bought me at a common price:
- Do not believe him. O, behold this ring,
- Whose high respect and rich validity
- Did lack a parallel; yet, for all that,
- He gave it to a commoner o' the camp,
- If I be one.
COUNTESS.
- He blushes, and 'tis it:
- Of six preceding ancestors, that gem,
- Conferr'd by testament to the sequent issue,
- Hath it been ow'd and worn. This is his wife;
- That ring's a thousand proofs.
KING.
- Methought you said
- You saw one here in court could witness it.
DIANA.
- I did, my lord, but loath am to produce
- So bad an instrument; his name's Parolles.
LAFEU.
- I saw the man to-day, if man he be.
KING.
- Find him, and bring him hither.
[Exit an Attendant.]
BERTRAM.
- What of him?
- He's quoted for a most perfidious slave,
- With all the spots o' the world tax'd and debauch'd:
- Whose nature sickens but to speak a truth:
- Am I or that or this for what he'll utter,
- That will speak anything?
KING.
- She hath that ring of yours.
BERTRAM.
- I think she has: certain it is I lik'd her,
- And boarded her i' the wanton way of youth:
- She knew her distance, and did angle for me,
- Madding my eagerness with her restraint,
- As all impediments in fancy's course
- Are motives of more fancy; and, in fine,
- Her infinite cunning with her modern grace,
- Subdu'd me to her rate: she got the ring;
- And I had that which any inferior might
- At market-price have bought.
DIANA.
- I must be patient:
- You that have turn'd off a first so noble wife
- May justly diet me. I pray you yet,—
- Since you lack virtue, I will lose a husband,—
- Send for your ring, I will return it home,
- And give me mine again.
BERTRAM.
- I have it not.
KING.
- What ring was yours, I pray you?
DIANA.
- Sir, much like
- The same upon your finger.
KING.
- Know you this ring? this ring was his of late.
DIANA.
- And this was it I gave him, being a-bed.
KING.
- The story, then, goes false you threw it him
- Out of a casement.
DIANA.
- I have spoke the truth.
BERTRAM.
- My lord, I do confess the ring was hers.
KING.
- You boggle shrewdly; every feather starts you.—
[Re-enter Attendant, with PAROLLES.]
- Is this the man you speak of?
DIANA.
- Ay, my lord.
KING.
- Tell me, sirrah, but tell me true I charge you,
- Not fearing the displeasure of your master,—
- Which, on your just proceeding, I'll keep off,—
- By him and by this woman here what know you?
PAROLLES.
- So please your majesty, my master hath been an honourable
- gentleman; tricks he hath had in him, which gentlemen
have.
KING.
- Come, come, to the purpose: did he love this woman?
PAROLLES.
- Faith, sir, he did love her; but how?
KING.
- How, I pray you?
PAROLLES.
- He did love her, sir, as a gentleman loves a woman.
KING.
- How is that?
PAROLLES.
- He loved her, sir, and loved her not.
KING.
- As thou art a knave and no knave.—
- What an equivocal companion is this!
PAROLLES.
- I am a poor man, and at your majesty's command.
LAFEU.
- He's a good drum, my lord, but a naughty orator.
DIANA.
- Do you know he promised me marriage?
PAROLLES.
- Faith, I know more than I'll speak.
KING.
- But wilt thou not speak all thou know'st?
PAROLLES.
- Yes, so please your majesty; I did go between them, as I
- said; but more than that, he loved her,—for indeed he was
mad
- for her, and talked of Satan, and of limbo, and of furies, and
I
- know not what: yet I was in that credit with them at that
time
- that I knew of their going to bed; and of other motions,
as
- promising her marriage, and things which would derive me
ill-will
- to speak of; therefore I will not speak what I know.
KING.
- Thou hast spoken all already, unless thou canst say they
are
- married: but thou art too fine in thy evidence; therefore
stand
- aside.—This ring, you say, was yours?
DIANA.
- Ay, my good lord.
KING.
- Where did you buy it? or who gave it you?
DIANA.
- It was not given me, nor I did not buy it.
KING.
- Who lent it you?
DIANA.
- It was not lent me neither.
KING.
- Where did you find it then?
DIANA.
- I found it not.
KING.
- If it were yours by none of all these ways,
- How could you give it him?
DIANA.
- I never gave it him.
LAFEU.
- This woman's an easy glove, my lord; she goes off and on
at
- pleasure.
KING.
- This ring was mine, I gave it his first wife.
DIANA.
- It might be yours or hers, for aught I know.
KING.
- Take her away, I do not like her now;
- To prison with her: and away with him.—
- Unless thou tell'st me where thou hadst this ring,
- Thou diest within this hour.
DIANA.
- I'll never tell you.
KING.
- Take her away.
DIANA.
- I'll put in bail, my liege.
KING.
- I think thee now some common customer.
DIANA.
- By Jove, if ever I knew man, 'twas you.
KING.
- Wherefore hast thou accus'd him all this while?
DIANA.
- Because he's guilty, and he is not guilty:
- He knows I am no maid, and he'll swear to't:
- I'll swear I am a maid, and he knows not.
- Great King, I am no strumpet, by my life;
- I am either maid, or else this old man's wife.
[Pointing to LAFEU.]
KING.
- She does abuse our ears; to prison with her.
DIANA.
- Good mother, fetch my bail.—Stay, royal sir;
[Exit WIDOW.]
- The jeweller that owes the ring is sent for,
- And he shall surety me. But for this lord
- Who hath abus'd me as he knows himself,
- Though yet he never harm'd me, here I quit him:
- He knows himself my bed he hath defil'd;
- And at that time he got his wife with child.
- Dead though she be, she feels her young one kick;
- So there's my riddle:—One that's dead is quick;
- And now behold the meaning.
[Re-enter Widow with HELENA.]
KING.
- Is there no exorcist
- Beguiles the truer office of mine eyes?
- Is't real that I see?
HELENA.
- No, my good lord;
- 'Tis but the shadow of a wife you see—
- The name, and not the thing.
BERTRAM.
- Both, both; O, pardon!
HELENA.
- O, my good lord, when I was like this maid;
- I found you wondrous kind. There is your ring,
- And, look you, here's your letter. This it says,
- 'When from my finger you can get this ring,
- And are by me with child, &c.'— This is done:
- Will you be mine now you are doubly won?
BERTRAM.
- If she, my liege, can make me know this clearly,
- I'll love her dearly, ever, ever dearly.
HELENA.
- If it appear not plain, and prove untrue,
- Deadly divorce step between me and you!—
- O my dear mother, do I see you living?
LAFEU.
- Mine eyes smell onions; I shall weep anon:—
- Good Tom Drum [to PAROLLES], lend me a handkercher: so, I
- thank thee; wait on me home, I'll make sport with thee:
- let thy courtesies alone, they are scurvy ones.
KING.
- Let us from point to point this story know,
- To make the even truth in pleasure flow:—
- If thou beest yet a fresh uncropped flower,
[To DIANA.]
- Choose thou thy husband, and I'll pay thy dower;
- For I can guess that, by thy honest aid,
- Thou kept'st a wife herself, thyself a maid.
- Of that and all the progress, more and less,
- Resolvedly more leisure shall express:
- All yet seems well; and if it end so meet,
- The bitter past, more welcome is the sweet.
[Flourish.]
- The king's a beggar, now the play is done;
- All is well-ended if this suit be won,
- That you express content; which we will pay
- With strife to please you, day exceeding day:
- Ours be your patience then, and yours our parts;
- Your gentle hands lend us, and take our hearts.
[Exeunt.]
THE END
 |
This work published before January 1, 1923 is in the public domain worldwide
because the author died at least 100 years ago. |
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