Bibliography

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Brother David Barth graduated from DeLaSalle High School in Minneapolis, Minnesota in 1958. He entered the Christian Brothers later that year and graduated from the Saint Paul Seminary in 1962. He chose not to have religious vows and instead became a Brother. He has taught at his alma mater, DeLaSalle High School, for more than 30 years.

Accomplishments in Religious Studies

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Brother Barth is responsible for several meta-philosophy and meta-ethical writings. Most notably, an unpublished thesis drawing connections between writings of American Black Humorist Kurt Vonnegut and modern American political discourse. It is available to read at the St. Thomas University Library and at Macalester College.

Teaching Style

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A right of passage at DeLaSalle is the infamous, and unique, "Brother D Sketch." Each Sketch contains direct quotes from famous theological and philosophical texts, along with commentary provided by Brother David. Each sketch occupies two complete pages and often contain built in homework questions. Brother David's classes are also exceptionally hard as well. An "A" is truly an achievement because it requires an arduous paper and 90% average. Daily quizzes make up the majority of the points in a Brother David class. Futhermore, absent students, even sick ones, are awarded no points during the days they miss. As Brother David put it, "those who aren't in class, don't learn! They don't deserve scores. Scores demonstrate learning. If you don't learn, you don't score."

Beliefs

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Brother David remains incredibly reverent in his Catholic beliefs. Every class begins with prayer and a reading from St. Augustine. Brother David has remarked that he prays 9 times a day. Unlike many modern Catholics, Brother David is an evolutionist. He has declared, on several occasions, that he'd "like to take a bat to those who read the Bible literally." His teachings in ethics often underscore evolutionary psychology. Furthermore, he advocates social justice as the most important act anyone can do.

Triva

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Brother David smokes a large brown pipe in between classes, and stands in the exact same spot to smoke every day.

He is noted for never moving to the side when walking down the hallway, instead allowing the oncoming traffic to part. On the rare occasion that a student doesn't move, Brother David simply stares the student into submission. This has led to several verbal altercations, but Brother David kept his cool.

His sense of style is also well noted. Following conservative guidelines for dress clothes, Brother David is an avid collector of Ralph Lauren dress shirts and pants. A unique paradox given his disdain for American consumerism.

He enjoys James Bond movies and old film noirs. (He went so far as to name one of his cats "Sam," as in Sam Spade, the famed detective of The Maltese Falcon.)


Memorable Quotes

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"Consciousness is useful!" (To a student who didn't reply when asked a question)

"They're stuck! Like Siamese triplets!" [on the trinity]

"Never miss an opportunity to shut up."

"Instead of crack babies, we have Original Sin babies!"

"The thing about democracy is that the winners don't have to be right."

"Jesus plays favorites." (On the apostles, specifically, Peter)

"Wait 'til you die, and Big Daddy'll get you."

"Have you ever, in a moment of utter foolishness, checked your horoscope in the paper?"

"If it was a movie, it would most certainly be an R. If they made it very graphic, it could make the X List." (On the Song of Solomon)

"Everyone's wondering who the next saint will be; smart money is on Mother Teresa."

"You wouldn't tell the story of the Parting of the Red Sea to explain tuna fishing in Albania."

"Forever keeps getting shorter according to divorce statistics."

"People Magazine is a living treatment of America's stupidity."