The Carlow Crab is an animated television sitcom created in Reynolds. It is Ultra-PIC and related to other PIC shows. It centers around a liberal jerk named Jack Jerk, and his, poor, conservative friend Ashley Asshole in central Lawsonville (although the show was not in the realm of being founded there}. He is a high-school teenager at Bikonoslinosriminos High, which is owned by an Aussie. He is made fun of by a Luxie jerk and the Trash sisters. Little do they know he is the famous "Carlow Crab" superhero. He figbts villains, such as The Tipperary Turtle.

Characters

Jack Jerk aka. Carlow Crab (Master Of All Things Blarney): A geeky kid
who hates his life when not Carlow Crab and enjoys it when it is. He
is picked on by popular kids and does badly on his science homework.
As a superhero he grabs villains and beats them up. He sometimes runs
into Cork Crab. He has power-ups from shells.

Ashley Asshole: A dumb blonde who lives in a trailer park. She is strongly Christian and has a Southern accent. She was originally intended to be intellegent, but, by NO HOMEWORK she was officially declared dumb.

Tipperary Turtle: An evil villainous turtle and arch-villain of Carlow
Crab. Unlike Carlow Crab, Tipperary Turtle came from Tipperary. He
destroys shamrocks, which is the most priceless thing int he world
according to Carlow Crab {except maybe his friendship}.

Kaptain Kalgoorlie: An Aussie teacher who is annoyed by his students.
Always gives incredible homework. He won awards as the most homework
giving character in any TV show ever.

Tosha Trash: A popular jerk who is richer than anybody else in the
show except Jean-Claude-Charlotte-Henri III of Esch-sur-Sure. Always
gets bumped into by Ashley but she never forgives Ashley or
acknowledges her existence. She, despite her snobby-ness, is mentally retarded.

Cork Crab: A crab who thinks he has more blarney than Carlow Crab. The
troublemaker of The Carlow Crab, as Tosha is to Jack. There is
evidence that the two are the same in the episode Vines of Virtue,
they were proven to be the same.

Jonathan Jerk and Jean Jerk: Overprotective parents of Jack jerk who
he mins alot. In some epsiodes they reminisce of when they whipped
Jack. They used to be croboys and crogirls but no longer are.

Tabitha Trash: Younger sister of Tosha Trash and a goth girl. She has
noted that, although she is not popular, she thinks Jack and Ashley
are losers. She has less money than her sister.

Farley Geeko: A computer geek 9000 who is a villain and shoots lasers
and is a maniac.

Limerick Lobster: A temporary sidekick to Carlow Crab who disappeared by Season 3. Gave him his supply of shells.

Jean-Claude-Charlotte-Henri III of Esch-sur-Sure: A character who
lives in Luxembourg but goes to the states a lot to make fun of it's
low-class popualtion. In one episode he shows of how much better Luxie
is by taking the class there. he thinks the friendship is too
American, and those of Luxembourg are beyond it.

Fukomos: An invisible villain who beats up women.

The Purple Turtle: The powerful sidekick to Tipperary Turtle who may hate him.

Uncle U-S-F-L: A jerk.

Minor Characters

Gary Grinch: The school bully who bashes testes.

Andy Asshole: Ashley's punky brother.

Albert and Amy Asshole: Ashley's Nascar-loving, redneck parents.

Trash's parents:Two very rich elitists.

Socked Cro:A weird guy who sells homes. Smokes cigars.

Kaptain Kalgoorlie's class:There are only three other people in the class besides, Jack, Ashley, Tosha, Tabitha, Jean-Claude-Charlotte-Henri III of Esch-sur-Sure, and Gary. No one else in the class does much of anything, but one of them is a hottie.

Cheese and Ham are Tosha Trash's friends.

In most "Tipperary Turtle episodes", an Irishman is seen running from Turtle's atatcks.

See also List of characters from The Carlow Crab.

Theme Song

Although Danny Phantom is a rip-off, the theme sing sounds totally different.

Goin' back to Carlow, Carlow, Carlow. Goin' back to Carlow, Carlow, Carlow

Episodes

Season One

1. The Prickly Pears

2. The House of Cros

3. Blarney Castle

4. No! Homework!

5. The Scum of the Earth

6. Penis Penthouse

7. Kiddie Crap

8. The Fight for The Blarney Stone

9. Blarney of all Blarney

10. Trash the Trash in Trash Alias

11. Luxus, Luxus

12. The Big Fight

13. Overprotective Shit

Season Two

14. Turtle Poop

15. Bridge Falling

16. Computer Lab

17. The Fallen

18. The Big Pile of Trash

19. Hamlet for the Ages

20. Technological Turtle Poop

21. Socked Cro's Homes

22. To Luxembourg Without Homework

23. Return of the Homework

24. The Fight at Tipperary

25. Ashley's Secret

26. The Big Revenge

Season Three

27. Gothic Gate

28. The Turtle Bombs Tokyo

29. Leftists are not Trash

30. Blarney-Off 9000

31. King and Queen of Croobystein

32. Jack Jerk in Prison

33. Return to the Rich Land

34. Vines of Virtue

35. Something Invisible Is Lurking

36. The Mountain Turtle

37. The IQ Test

38. The Luxies Take Over

39. Computerized Merging

Season Four

40. The Invisible One's Secret

41. Tosha and Tabitha Are Crazy

42. A Rainy Day At Fokomoskine

43. Luxembourg is Bombed

44. Bad Turtle Is Wild

45. Hypno-Gun of Power

46. Back to the Blarney

47. The Uncle Is Watching

48. Luxie Is Punished

49. Mutant Crab, Mutant Turtle

50. Vlorvache Strawberry

51. Unity of All Villains

52. SPECIAL EPISODE The Elitists Episode

Season Five

No episodes are in this season although there is palnning for a Night
Croboy Damnation episode.

Other Things

Tosha is an American popular-kid type snob.
Jean-Claude-Charlotte-Henri III of Esch-sur-Sure is a rich high-class
old world European polite-and-well-educated-and-incredibly rich type
snob from the world's richest and most educated country (and
snobbiest), Luxembourg.

Example