Chris Gordon (born October 18 1985 in Grimsby, England) is a professional footballer currently playing for Eastwood Town.

Left sided defender Chris Gordon began his career with Lincoln City, linking up with the Centre of Excellence at under 15 level and subsequently completing a three year scholarship at Sincil Bank. In his second scholarship year, a series of impressive performances, particularly in a County Cup tie against Grimsby Town, saw him called up to the first team squad where he was an unused substitute in the away game with Cheltenham Town on 6th March 2004. His progress during his scholarship period was rewarded with a one year professional contract for the 2005/06 season. He started the season with a month long loan period at Gainsborough Trinity but upon his return failed to break into the first team squad. It was no surprise that he was released in May 2006. Following an initial trial period, Chris penned a short-term deal with Cambridge United in July 2006. At the beginning of October 2006, he moved to Eastwood Town. He later recieved a letter from Oprah Winfrey to be a guest on her show. On his first and only appearnce on the Oprah Winfrey Show he did a backflip and Oprah was like, "woah!" Oprah suggested that he become a pirate, and so month later he had been spotted on a pirate ship in the North Atlantic. He ate fried chicken once a week to increase his Hit Points (HP) and learned the attack "Thunder" at level 40. In 1998 Chris Gordon maried Hoopa Binkton, his tea kettle. They had their honeymoon in Georgia. Th couple were divorced by 2001. When asked why, Chris Gordon said his wife had slept with every man ever...ever. That's bad. After the divorce Chris decided to go to his SECRET TREASURE ISLAND, which is located EAST OF MADAGASCAR. His ship was caught in a hurricans and he has not been seen since. Some say he's still sailing on the ocean. Some say he's not. Omgz!