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"Empty Cans" is the ending to A Grand Don't Come For Free, an album by Mike Skinner, AKA The Streets. It is also the longest The Streets song so far, with a running time of 8 minutes and 15 seconds. The song tells two very different endings as follows:


Pessimistic ending

Mike is now fed up with his life. His friend Dan has betrayed him, His friend Scott did not tell him about Mike's girlfriend Simone's relationship with Dan. Now drunk on the sofa, with wall-to-wall empty cans, he despises everyone he knows. Scott texts to say he'll fix the TV, but Mike, obviously, rejects him. He gets the Yellow Pages and finds a company, who take away the TV. Two hours later, the repairman comes to tell him about somehing he's found in the TV. Mike, now a pessimist, obviously thinks he is being tapped up for more money, and so says 'No.' The repairman says it isn't like that, so Mike tells him to go and die. The repairman says that Mike cannot talk to him like that, and the two brawl. The repairman bashes Mike's head onto the corner of the fridge, and while Mike is dazed he runs away. Mike then reveals he has been recalling this whole event, drunk on the sofa, and then ties it off, saying that no-one is there for him, humanity hates him. As the final chorus ends, all of a sudden there is the sound of a tape rewinding.

Optimistic ending

The song has rewound to the start. Again, Mike is fed up. After smoking from a bong, Scott texts him and Mike feels like rejecting him, but reading the text again, he decides to say yes to make things even, and Scott says it's the least he can do. Scott comes round and takes part of the TV off, but the panel in the back is jammed. Scott knows something is in there, and Mike doesn't want it lost in case it is a final warning bill. Scott rams his hand in, feeling around, before shouting in disbelief. Mike comes over, as Scott has a huge grin and cannot believe what he's pulling out. When Scott finally does, Mike can't believe it either. He's found it, his £1000. People come over, and after they leave, Mike contemplates how Scott needs to keep Scott's back, not his. He prepares to mend his life, he picks up his pace and runs into the morning.

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