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Semi-Pro

Promotional film poster
Directed by Kent Alterman
Produced by Jimmy Miller
Co-Producer:
Joshua Church
Executive Producer:
Toby Emmerich
Lauren Shuler Donner
Kent Alterman
Michael Aguilar
Cale Boyte
David Householter
Written by Scot Armstrong
Starring Will Ferrell
Woody Harrelson
André Benjamin
Maura Tierney
David Koechner
Will Arnett
Andrew Daly
Andy Richter
Ryan Marques
Rob Corddry
Matt Walsh
Music by Theodore Shapiro
Cinematography Shane Hurlbut
Editing by Debra Neil-Fisher
Studio Donners' Company
MFP Semi-Pro
Mosaic Media Group
New Line Cinema
Road Rebel
Distributed by New Line Cinema
Release date(s) February 29, 2008 (US/UK)
Running time 92 min.
Country United States
Language English
Gross revenue $43,884,904 (worldwide) [1]

Semi-Pro is a 2008 American sports comedy film from New Line Cinema. The film was directed by Kent Alterman and stars Will Ferrell as Jackie Moon, Woody Harrelson, André Benjamin, Maura Tierney, Will Arnett and David Koechner. The film was shot in Los Angeles near Dodger Stadium (in the gym of the Los Angeles City Fire Department Training Center), in Detroit and in Flint, Michigan. It was released in theaters on February 29, 2008, and was released on DVD and Blu-ray on June 3, 2008.[2]

Contents

Plot

Set in 1976, Jackie Moon is a singer who has used the profits from his one hit single "Love Me Sexy", to buy a basketball team in the American Basketball Association, the Flint Tropics, becoming the owner, head coach, and starting power forward. The ABA commissioner announces plans for the ABA-NBA merger with the National Basketball Association, but only four teams will move to the more established league. The Tropics, the worst team in the league, are in danger of dissolving. In response, Jackie argues that the teams with the four best records overall should be merged into the NBA. The commissioner reluctantly accepts Jackie's offer.

Now that the Tropics have somewhat of a shot to be an NBA franchise, Jackie trades away the team's washing machine to the Kentucky Colonels for Ed Monix, former backup point guard for the NBA Champion Boston Celtics. Soon, the commissioner reveals that as well as having a top-four record, the Tropics will also have to have a stable fan base and have an attendance of at least 2,000 fans every remaining game of the season.

Jackie begins to promote wildly by such gimmicks as watching him wrestle a bear after the game. The Tropics begin playing better with Monix, as well as the increased intensity of Clarence "Coffee Black/Sugar Dunkerton/Downtown Funky Stuff Malone" Withers. Monix soon takes over as offensive and defensive coordinators, as well as starting point guard, leaving Jackie merely the title of head coach. Monix trains the team rigorously with a play he calls the "puke", as the players are to run it, without a ball, until they vomit.

From Monix's training, the Tropics go on a winning run, moving them up from last to fifth. Suddenly Jackie, now extremely excited about the possibilities in his grasp, gets a visit from the commissioner. The commissioner tells the team that the NBA does not think that Flint has a large enough media market and will not allow the Tropics into the league even if they beat the first place San Antonio Spurs on Saturday. Distressed, Jackie admits that he stole "Love Me Sexy" from a napkin his mother wrote on three weeks before she died. Now realizing that all his assets, including the team, are basically stolen, Jackie trades Coffee Black to the Spurs so that he may realize his talent in the NBA. Monix inspires the team to leave everything on the court as, while they may not be able to continue the franchise after this season, they have come very far and still have a lot to prove.

Going into the Spurs game, they are in fifth place and with a win they would make it into fourth, although they have no chance in making it into the NBA. The game begins and the Tropics fall behind quickly. In the closing seconds of the first half, Jackie gets fouled hard by Spurs player Petrelli while going up for a shot, and is injured. Coffee Black decides he has seen enough, and rushes in to the Tropics' locker rooms with the rest of the team, which angers the Spurs' players and coach.

During halftime, an unconscious Jackie imagines that he is in heaven with his mother. He apologizes for stealing her song and then she gives him a weapon in order to win the final game of the franchise. Awaking in the locker room, he tells the team what they are going to do to win. Back on the court, the Tropics reveal their new weapon: the Alley-Oop. With the return of Coffee Black, it is very effective and Black leads the charge. At first, the referee calls the play a foul, but after some persuasion by Jackie and Monix, is soon convinced that it is a legitimate score. The Tropics take advantage of this new strategy and begin coming back. After the Spurs start defending against the alley oop, Monix then takes charge and calls for them to run "The Puke" with 12 seconds left and down by two points, 115-117. The play gives Jackie the ball, but he gets fouled hard again with two seconds left. Shooting "granny style", Moon sinks the first basket. The second rebounds off and Monix tips it in right at the buzzer for two points to score a victory for the Tropics.

The coach of the Spurs offers Coffee Black a position on the team. The now-former ABA commissioner offers Jackie a position on the staff of the NBA assistant commissioner, as a marketing director. Just as Jackie is about to accept, the commissioner is mauled by the bear Jackie wrestled with earlier.

Cast

Dewie the Bear

The 5-year-old, 7 1/2 foot tall, 700 pound male grizzly bear named Rocky appeared in the film in a scene where Will Ferrell's character wrestles him to promote his basketball team. Stuntman and trainer Randy Miller doubled for Ferrell during the wrestling match with the bear. On April 22, 2008, the bear bit 39-year-old Stephan Miller (Randy Miller's cousin and fellow trainer) on the neck, killing him.[3]

Marketing

  • A number shown in the teaser trailer 1-800-TROPICS, when called played a recorded message of Jackie Moon talking about season ticket packages for the 1976 season.
  • Several ads for Anheuser-Busch were filmed featuring Will Ferrell in character as Jackie Moon that were aired during Super Bowl XLII.[4] Some of the ads touted humorous promotional items with offers expiring in November 1977.[5]
  • A music video was released with Jackie Moon singing his 'hit' "Love Me Sexy"
  • A prescreening at the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin, Texas two weeks prior to the box office debut featured an appearance by Will Ferrell and director Kent Alterman. In order to obtain entrance to the theater, all viewers had to wear a basketball uniform similar to the one worn by Ferrell in the film.
  • A Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue spread featured Ferrell with Heidi Klum.[6]

Reception

Critical reception

The film received negative reviews from critics. The review aggregator Rotten Tomatoes reported that 21% of critics gave the film positive reviews, based on 149 reviews (as of June 23, 2008).[7] Metacritic reported the film had an average score of 47 out of 100, based on 29 reviews.[8]

In his review for The Village Voice, Robert Wilonsky wrote that director Kent Alterman, "valiantly tries to tweak the formula by adding a dash more sincerity and humanity to the froth but doesn't get too adventurous. But in the end, it's comedy comfort food, something powdered poured from a box".[9]

Box office performance

In its opening weekend, the film grossed $15 million in 3,121 theaters in the United States and Canada, holding the number one position at the box office.[10] Alicia Chang of the Associated Press described the opening as "lackluster" compared to Ferrell's previous sports spoofs Talladega Nights, which opened with $47 million, and Blades of Glory, which opened with $33 million. The basketball film went on to gross $33,479,698 domestically and $10,404,532 internationally, for a total of $43,884,230 worldwide.[11]

Awards

2008 ESPY Awards

  1. Best Sports Movie ESPY Award

Home Media

The film was released on DVD and Blu-ray Disc on June 3, 2008. There is a theatrical R-Rated version DVD and Blu-Ray Disc or a 2-Disc "Let's Get Sweaty" Unrated Edition DVD and Blu-ray Disc. Special features include unrated deleted scenes and more.

Soundtrack

Semi-Pro (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)
Soundtrack by various artists
Released February 26, 2008
Label New Line Records

The soundtrack for the film was released on February 26, 2008 and featured songs by Labelle, WAR, Curtis Mayfield, Will Ferrell, among others. "Love Me Sexy" is sung by the fictional Jackie Moon (played by Will Ferrell).

  1. "Love Me Sexy" – Jackie Moon
  2. "Get Da Funk Out Ma' Face" – Brothers Johnson
  3. "Lady Marmalade" – Labelle
  4. "The World Is a Ghetto" – WAR
  5. "Tell Me Something Good" – Ronnie Laws
  6. "Mr. Big Stuff" – Jean Knight
  7. "Give Me Just a Little More Time" – Chairmen of the Board
  8. "Why Can't We Be Friends" – WAR
  9. "Walking in Rhythm" – The Blackbyrds
  10. "Dance to the Music" – Sly & The Family Stone
  11. "Love Rollercoaster" – Ohio Players
  12. "Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be, Will Be)" – Sly & The Family Stone
  13. "Move on Up" – Curtis Mayfield
  14. "Shining Star" – Earth, Wind, & Fire

See also

References

External links


Quotes

Up to date as of January 14, 2010

From Wikiquote

Semi-Pro is a 2008 sports comedy film directed by Kent Alterman and staring Will Ferrell, Andre Benjamin, Will Arnett, Woody Harrelson, Maura Tierney, Andrew Daly, and David Koechner.

Contents

Jackie Moon

  • Everybody panic! Oh my God, there's a bear loose in the coliseum! There will be no refunds! Your refund will be escaping this deathtrap with your life! If you have a small child, use it as a shield! They love the tender meat! Cover your sodas! Dewie loves sugar!
  • Let's get Tropical!
  • It feels like I got cat piss in my eyes!
  • In the anals of history, people are going to be talking about three things: the discovery of fire, invention of the submarine, and the Flint, Michigan Mega Bowl.
  • GOD DAMN IT, VAKIDIS, LEARN FUCKIN' ENGLISH!
  • I'm so excited, I can't even...feel my arms!
  • EVERYBODY LOVE EVERYBODY!
  • (to Monix) I wish you were still a washing machine!
  • SUCK MY COCK, I'LL MURDER YOUR FAMILY!
  • Heaven wants us to win this game! I'LL BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!
  • EVERYBODY PANIC! IT'S JUST LIKE THE TITANIC, BUT IT'S FULL OF BEARS!
  • If you see a possum, try to kill it. It's not a pet.
  • SOMEBODY HIT SOMEBODY!
  • Get the funk out of my face. Get. The. Funk. Out Of My Face.
  • You motherfucking cocksuckers!
  • It's like the Titanic only with bears !

Dialogue

Lou Redwood: Well, he sat on the bench, right? I mean, if you watch a porn movie, doesn't mean you got laid.
Dick Pepperfield: No. No, in fact it often means the opposite.

Lou Redwood: You know, I might suit up tonight, Dick. Sometimes I still dream of glory.
Dick Pepperfield: [chuckles] Well, sometimes dreams can turn into nightmares, Lou.
Lou Redwood: ...What's your problem?

[Jackie is lying in a dumpster]

Ed Monix: Jackie, what are you eating?
Jackie: I think it's a pancake...
Monix: How long's that been there Jackie?
Jackie: It's been here a while...

[Lou, Jackie, Cornelius, Bobby, and Dick are playing cards]

Lou Redwood: Oh my God...what the fuck is that, it's incredible! [about the fondue he just ate]
Jackie Moon: It's called fondue.
Lou Redwood: Fon-what?
Jackie Moon: Fondue. Three different cheeses, melted together. That's what you're tasting. Gorgonzola, Munster, and cottage.
Bobby Dee: It's the latest thing from Sweden, apparently.
Dick Pepperfield: Well, I'm not surprised; those Swedes are so inventive. [others agree]
Bobby Dee: They are my favorite producers of pornography.
Jackie Moon: They do make an excellent fuck picture!
Dick Pepperfield: Well, I think I'll excuse myself from this conversation, right now.
Jackie Moon: To the men's room.
Dick Pepperfield: Oh, stop it.
Jackie Moon: To make your wiener sing...boner machine. [others are laughing]
Dick Pepperfield: I am not a boner machine!
Lou Redwood: Swedish porn saved my life in 'Nam. [others groan] Hey, come on, you guys. Swedish porn was the only thing that kept my mind off Charlie while I was in the shit.
Bobby Dee: Is the shit in Ann Arbor? Cause that's where you were during the war. [others laugh]
Cornelius Banks: You were never in 'Nam, you jive turkey. [laughter stops]
Lou Redwood: [coldly] Did you just call me a jive turkey? [Cornelius shakes his head]
Jackie Moon: No. No, he did not, he uh...he called you cocksucker. Right Cornelius?
Cornelius Banks: Yeah, I just called you cocksucker!
Lou Redwood: Pretty sure you called me a jive turkey.
Dick Pepperfield: No, no, now Lou, nobody called anyone a J.T.
Lou Redwood: Jive turkey is a little over the line, man!
Jackie Moon: Look. We were all here, we all heard what was said, and we're in agreement, Cornelius said cocksucker. Right?
Bobby Dee: He just said you suck cock!
Dick Pepperfield: That's all he said about you.
Jackie Moon: Come on. Dig into that fondue...little cocksucker. [others laugh]
Lou Redwood: We like playing games, don't we? [laughing]
Jackie Moon: It's true, we're playing one right now.
Lou Redwood: I'm gonna show you guys this game I learned in fuckin' 'Nam! [draws a gun and points it at Cornelius] Who's the jive turkey now? [bursts out laughing] Gun's not loaded! [all laugh]
Jackie Moon: It's not loaded!
Lou Redwood: You should've seen your goddamn faces! I never load it!
Cornelius Banks: The gun was not loaded!
Jackie Moon: I'll see you fuckers in hell. [puts gun to his head and pulls trigger; all laugh]
Bobby Dee: Jackie, "Love Me Sexy" is the worst song I've ever heard. [aims at Jackie and pulls trigger]
Cornelius Banks: I did call you jive turkey. [aims gun at Lou, pulls trigger]
Dick Pepperfield: [playfully, pointing gun at Lou] I know you slept with Mrs. Pepperfield!
Lou Redwood: [laughing] We're saying nutty things 'cause they're not true...especially that, more than the rest.
Jackie Moon: Hey. Bond, James Bond. Eh? [rests gun on forearm]
Dick Pepperfield: How do you like your martinis, sir?
Jackie Moon: Stirred, in a half carafe. [aims gun at crotch and pulls trigger]
Cornelius Banks: He shoots himself!
Jackie Moon: He shoots himself in the wiener! [tosses gun down and it goes off suddenly]

Jackie: There'll be a lotta television cameras out there so we just gotta be tip top.
Clarence Coffee Black: So what's the plan?
Jackie: Brought a secret weapon. It's going to make us look extra cool on TV.
Bee Bee Ellis: What the hell is that?
Jackie: It's eyeliner, dummy! Now who's first? Monix?
Monix: Oh, yeah... Let me get a fresh Maxi-Pad outta my purse.

Monix: Vakidis, open the window, will ya?
Vakidis: Yes, right on! (does nothing)
Monix: Vakidis, did you give Bobby Dee a handjob?
Vakidis: Yes, right on!

Dick Pepperfield: Lou, would you mind putting out that cigarette, it's very unprofessional.
Lou Redwood: No, I like to smoke when I drink.

Lou Redwood: Jackie Moon is Flint's favorite son. And he has done more for this city than any human being who's ever lived on this planet!
Dick Pepperfield: With the possible exception of, eh, Henry Ford...Jackie Moon has done a lot for this city, you're right about that.

[Talking about Vakidis]

Dick Pepperfield: He scares me!
Lou Redwood: That little kid from the Jackson 5, he scares you too.
Dick Pepperfield: Oh, mark my words, Lou, there is something very creepy about that young man.

Others

  • Petrelli: How come it says "Monix" on your jersey when your name's "Pussy"?
  • Cornelius Banks: Ohhhh, I did get shot!
  • Dick Pepperfield: Jackie's teammates doing just an awful job of stabilizing his spine as they carry him off the court.
  • Alan the Commissioner: No, no, Jackie, don't bite yourself!
  • Dick Pepperfield: Here comes the Alley...and there goes the Oop!
  • Clarence Coffee Black: Who the fuck is Bambi?

External links

Wikipedia
Wikipedia has an article about:

Official site








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