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Spin City
Spin City - title.jpg
The original Spin City intertitle, as seen during season one (1996–1997)
Format Sitcom
Created by Gary David Goldberg
Bill Lawrence
Starring Michael J. Fox (seasons 1–4)
Charlie Sheen (seasons 5–6)
Heather Locklear (seasons 4–6)
Barry Bostwick
Richard Kind
Michael Boatman
Alan Ruck
Carla Gugino (early season 1)
Connie Britton (seasons 1–4)
Alexander Chaplin (seasons 1–4)
Victoria Dillard (seasons 1–4)
Jennifer Esposito (seasons 2–4)
Lana Parrilla (season 5)
Theme music composer Shelley Palmer (seasons 1 and 4)
Danny Pelfrey (seasons 5–6)
Country of origin  USA
No. of seasons 6
No. of episodes 145 (List of episodes)
Production
Executive producer(s) Gary David Goldberg (seasons 1–3, 5–6)
Michael J. Fox (seasons 1–4)
Bill Lawrence (season 3)
David S. Rosenthal
Andy Cadiff (season 4)
Tom Hertz (season 6)
Camera setup Film; Multiple camera
Running time approx. 22 minutes
Production company(s) Ubu Productions
Lottery Hill Entertainment
DreamWorks SKG
Distributor Paramount Television Distribution (2000–2006)
CBS Paramount Television Distribution (2006–2007)
CBS Television Distribution (2007–2009)
Disney-ABC Domestic Television (2009–present)
Broadcast
Original channel ABC
Picture format 480i (SDTV; entire run)
720p (HDTV; season 6)
Original run September 17, 1996 – April 30, 2002
Status Cancelled/ended

Spin City is an American sitcom television series that ran from 1996 to 2002 on ABC. Created by Gary David Goldberg and Bill Lawrence, the show was based on a fictional local government running New York City, and originally starred Michael J. Fox as Mike Flaherty, the Deputy Mayor of New York. The show was cancelled in 2002 due to low ratings from the 2001–2002 season and a change in target demographics.

In 2000, Paramount Television (which produced Michael J. Fox's earlier sitcom, Family Ties) began syndicating the series to local stations (Paramount parent Viacom would later buy the show's producer DreamWorks). It and successor companies owned distribution rights until 2009, when DreamWorks became independent again. The syndication rights are held by ABC's syndication arm, Disney-ABC Domestic Television, as Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures will begin distributing DreamWorks live-action films in 2009. However, the Paramount Television logo tag remains to be shown after the end credits of reruns of the series.

Contents

Premise

The series focuses on the Mayor of New York City, Randall Winston (Barry Bostwick), and his staff as they run the city—although the main person in charge is Deputy Mayor Mike Flaherty (Michael J. Fox). Mike is excellent at his job, dealing with spin and lies, but not so good with his personal life, which he often neglects. Other members of staff at City Hall include press secretary Paul Lassiter (Richard Kind), the office cheapskate, suck-up, and noted coward, who has a habit of being a loudmouth and is often kept in the dark about things; chief of staff Stuart Bondek (Alan Ruck), who loves the ladies and is often very sexist; head of minority affairs Carter Heywood (Michael Boatman), a gay black man who owns a suicidal dog named Rags. Despite their overwhelming personal differences, Stuart and Carter actually become roommates and the best of friends. Also part of the staff are speech writer James Hobert (Alexander Chaplin), who is easily led and quite naive; Mike's secretary Janelle Cooper (Victoria Dillard); and her assistant Nikki Faber (Connie Britton). Janelle later became the mayor's secretary and Stacy Paterno (Jennifer Esposito) joined the show as Mike's secretary. Each of them has to help run City Hall, improving the Mayor's image and cover for his frequent gaffes, while sorting out their personal lives.

At the start of the series, Mike is dating reporter Ashley Schaffer (Carla Gugino). In early promos for the series, this relationship is shown to be the main premise of the show. After just a few episodes into the series, Gugino decided to leave. The nature of Carter and Stuart's relationship became a running gag during the series. The two ended up becoming so close that their friendship was mocked by others, and their arguments sounded so much like husband and wife that a whole episode was dedicated to the notion that the two argued like a married couple. The two ended up meeting an older duo of best friends (one black and one white) that were virtual twins of Carter and Stuart in terms of personality; when it was discovered that the two older versions had become a couple, it ended up scaring Stuart quite a bit. For his part, Stuart tends to be very possessive of his time with Carter, going so far as to be genuinely jealous when Carter spends more and more time with new campaign manager Caitlin (Heather Locklear) [see below]. In spite of all the jokes and innuendo, they prove to be best friends willing to do anything for both their friends and each other.

During the fourth season, Stacy was replaced by James. Her absence was never explained, nor was she mentioned again after James took over her duties.

The later years

In 1998, Michael J. Fox announced that he had Parkinson's disease. As a result, a new character, Caitlin Moore (Heather Locklear) was introduced at the start of the 1999–2000 season to help share Mike's workload. Caitlin was Mayor Winston's campaign manager as he decided to run for Senator, and there was much friction between Mike and Caitlin about who was in charge of the Mayor. Their relationship, was more complex than a simple rivalry and there were hints that it would become more than platonic.

In 2000, as his symptoms worsened, Fox announced that he was leaving the show at the end of the season to spend more time with his family and to raise money for awareness of and research into Parkinson's.[1] His character left City Hall at the end of the show's 4th season, taking the blame for an alleged Mafia link that the Mayor unknowingly had.[2] He later moved to Washington, D.C. as an environmental lobbyist, there meeting a senator named Alex P. Keaton (the name of the character Fox played on Family Ties[3]).[2] Executive Producer/co-creator Bill Lawrence also left the show, along with a few cast members and writers/producers.

The remaining producers decided to carry on the series with a new lead. For the show's 5th season, production moved from New York to Los Angeles, and Charlie Sheen as new Deputy Mayor Charlie Crawford, joining Caitlin, Paul, Stuart, Carter, and the Mayor. The characters of Nikki, Janelle and James were not carried over (like Stacy, their absences were never explained), replaced by assistant Angie Ordonez (Lana Parrilla), who likewise left after one season without explanation (Parrilla feeling the character was underused).

Ratings

Seasonal rankings (based on average total viewers per episode) of Spin City.

Note: Each U.S. network television season starts in late September and ends in late May, which coincides with the completion of May sweeps.

Season Season premiere Season finale TV season Ranking Viewers
(in millions)
1st September 17, 1996 May 13, 1997 1996–1997 #17[4] 11.7[4]
2nd September 24, 1997 May 20, 1998 1997–1998 #47[5] 8.4[5]
3rd September 22, 1998 May 25, 1999 1998–1999 #28[6] 13.1[6]
4th September 21, 1999 May 24, 2000 1999–2000 #33[7] 8.7[7]
5th October 18, 2000 May 23, 2001 2000–2001 #56[8] 7.1[8]
6th September 25, 2001 April 30, 2002 2001–2002 #78[9] 8.4[9]

Awards

The show won four Golden Globes (three for Michael J. Fox and one for Charlie Sheen), out of its nine nominations

Episodes

DVD releases

Shout! Factory has released the first 3 seasons of Spin City on DVD in Region 1.[1]

Dreamworks has also published two DVD boxes titled "Michael J. Fox – His All Time Favorites" Vols. 1 and 2 in 2003, both containing eleven episodes. All 22 episodes are taken from the four seasons containing Fox, each starting with a brief interview in which he describes what he likes about the episode. In the 2003 interviews, Fox shows symptoms of his ongoing illness. Both DVD boxes contain bonus material with fund-raising TV commercials for Parkinson's Disease research, starring the Spin City cast.

DVD Name Ep # Release Date Bonus Features
The Complete First Season 24 November 4, 2008
  • All-New Interviews with Michael J. Fox, the Series Creators and the Ensemble cast
  • 7 Episode Commentaries
  • Highlights of The Paley Center for Media Seminar featuring Gary David Goldberg and Michael J. Fox in 1996
  • Special Message from The Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson's Research: an inspiring video showcasing Team Fox, the Foundation's community fundraising program
The Complete Second Season 24 April 28, 2009
The Complete Third Season 26 November 3, 2009
The Complete Fourth Season TBA

References

External links


Quotes

Up to date as of January 14, 2010

From Wikiquote

Spin City (1998-2002), was a United States sitcom, that starred Michael J. Fox, Barry Bostwick, Richard Kind, Alan Ruck and Michael Boatman.

Contents

Season One

Pilot [1.1]

Mike: Who here is gay?

(Mike turns to Karen, who is smiling and giggling.)

Mike: Not that kind of gay.

Nikki: (on phone): I didn't mean to scare you, it was just a simple run of the mill orgasm... (Mike walks up) ...Can you hold on a second, Mom?
Mike: Oh, I'll let you get back to your mom, before she loses her erection

Reporter: Mr. Mayor, would you consider marching in the gay pride parade this week?
Mayor: What are you, drunk?

The Great Pretender [1.2]

The Apartment [1.3]

Pride and Prejudice [1.4]

The Rivals [1.5]

Mike: (about Mayor Garfield's passing) We need to get working on your statement.
Mayor: I killed him. I killed him dead.
Mike: That's a good starting point. How about softening it up a little?

Mayor: It's not jealousy; I just wish I had what he had.

Nikki: They had a candle light vigil at the fountain last night. Hundreds showed up.
Carter: Of course only five people could fit around it at one time. They had to vigil in shifts.

A Star Is Born [1.6]

Grand Illusion [1.7]

The High and the Mighty [1.8]

Meet Tommy Dugan [1.9]

The Competition [1.10]

Carter: Believe it or not, I came out at Thanksgiving.
Nikki: How'd you pull that off?
Carter: Very subtle. "Dad, great job carving the turkey. I'm a homosexual."
Nikki: Well, every year, I go to my sister's house, hug her three beautiful children, then my family gathers round, ties me to a chair, and pummels me with questions about why I'm not married yet.
Stuart: Me, my mom, my dad, three Hungry Man dinners, and a big box of wine. First "I hate you" comes out around 9:30.

Dog Day Afternoon [1.11]

Criss Cross [1.12]

Bye Bye Love [1.13]

Starting Over [1.14]

Mike: I'm not a club kinda guy. If I wanna shout, I'll go visit my grandmother.

{-}

Carter: It's not like I'm sleeping with every man in town. You are straight. Do you sleep with every woman you meet?
Stuart: YES!

Gabby's Song [1.15]

Kiss Me, Stupid [1.16]

An Affair to Remember [1.17]

Snowbound [1.18]

Striptease [1.19]

Deaf Becomes Her [1.20]

Stuart: Who's looking out for the white middle-class, heterosexual male?
Carter: Congress.

Hot in the City [1.21]

Paul: C'mon trade with me, my nuns for your lesbians.
Carter: They're not baseball cards, Paul.

Paul: What do lesbians know about me? This could be a fabulous opportunity!
Stuart: To remind them why they're lesbians?

Mike: Are you telling me that your pregnant?
Carrie: No, but I will be thanks to you.
Mike: Wait a second, am I missing a step here, cause if you're talking about last night, I took precautions, we took precautions!
Carrie: Let't just say I'm the kinda girl who never throws anything away...I put it in the freezer.
Mike: You froze my guys?!
Carrie: I'm just here to get your blessing.
Mike: What am I, the pope?!
Carrie: Don't yell at me!
Mike: Those are my guys, I want them back!
Carrie: Look, if you're gonna be all weird about this, I'm just gonna leave!
Mike: You can't do this! (opens office door) GIMME BACK MY SPERM!

Paul: As a show of good faith, you have to release 1, maybe 2 million of the hostages.

Bone Free [1.22]

Nikki: Why couldn't the Mayor just stand up?

(Male coworkers chuckling)

Nikki: What? What am I missing?
Mike: How am I gonna explain this. Okay, Nikki. Even though the Mayor wasn't actually standing...he was at full attention.
Nikki: Nooo.
Mike: Yes, now how are we gonna explain this little snub to the Woman's Action Caucus?
Stuart: Snub? The man paid the woman the ultimate compliment!
Mike: Yeah, if they were orangutans.

Nikki: Can't you guys control those things?
Stuart: Not always.
Mike: You can scold it, or smack it around a little bit. That only seems to encourage it.
Nikki: I am fascinated.
James: Sometimes all it takes is a thought, memory...sometimes all it takes is a slight breeze.

Mike: Basically, by 6 o'clock, anyone in the city with breasts is going to hate us.
Stuart: Welcome to my world.

Stuart: Why do women always go for losers like him?
Carter: What, instead of losers like you?

James: We've got to rescue her from that monster!
Mike: He's her boyfriend, he's not Jason.

Paul: If you'd given me any more time I could've recovered.
Mike: Paul, if I'd have given you any more time up there, you would have declared the Mayor dead.

Mayor: It was back in the '60s, and I was at this party and some idiot spiked the Kool-Aid. Before I knew it, I was 3/4 up a pine tree, naked as a jay bird, trying to get away from all the giant bugs, there.
Mike: Well, there you have it. Okay, so I tell the press that you were in a mental hospital...because you were taking acid.
Mayor: Coincidentally, that was the same night I decided to run for Mayor.

Mike: Playing doctor should be left to qualified professionals. And of course, curious youngsters.

The Mayor Who Came to Dinner [1.23]

Mayor Over Miami [1.24]

Season Two

Paul Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest [2.1]

Porn in the U.S.A. [2.2]

Mike: (to the porn actresses) I'm Deputy Mayor Michael Flaherty, and I'm going to pretend I don't know who any of you are.

Mike: (to Stuart) Ok, Stuart. Inside that is some of the biggest names in the porn buisness. Your heroes.

Carter: Can't you tell if a man is handsome?
Stuart: Huh, nice try.

Nikki: I can't get from ESPN to the Comedy Channel without some big penis waving in my face.
James: Where are you watching television?

Mayor: (reading cue cards) Good afternoon, all. I want to start out with a personal outrage that has been going on too long. Public access... (switches cards) ...pornography.
Mike: (to James) You want to work on where you break those cards.
Mayor: (reading cue cards) I just want to make sure that material with graphic sexual content is available and seen... (switches cards) ...only by those people who specifically want to see it.
Mike: (to James) Ok, you did that one on purpose.

Mike: (on the porn industry) Is lack of exposure really a problem for them?

Mike: I have a penis.
Nikki: Don't make me get my purse.

Wonder Woman [2.3]

The Goodbye Girl [2.4]

In the Heat of the Day [2.5]

Radio Daze [2.6]

The Thirty Year Itch [2.7]

My Life is a Soap Opera [2.8]

Family Affair (1) [2.9]

Family Affair (2) [2.10]

They Shoot Horses, Don't They? [2.11]

Stacey: I can tell when people are lying. It's a gift.
James: You know, I have a friend who can do the same thing.
Stacey: No you don't.

Stuart: Why wouldn't you ask me to look after The Mayor's daughter?
Mike: Same reason they don't give guns to monkeys

Miracle Near 34th Street [2.12]

Mike: As my assistant, occasionally you may need to assist me.

Stacey: Every time I throw a Christmas party, someone dies.
Janelle: I guess every family has their traditions.

Paul: So to sum up ladies and gentlemen...I don't know

James: Every year, my mom makes a whole Nativity scene out of candy. (picks up a piece) Chocolate Jesus.
Carter: James, please. At work, just call me Carter.

Nikki: Do you not have an ounce of Christmas Spirit in you?
Stuart: Well, Joseph was about 3 ounces.

Mayor: I'm going to stand here and read this story to the city, because I want all the children out there to believe in the magic of (reading speech) Satan.
Mike: That's Santa. It's a typo.

Same Time Next Year [2.13]

The Paul Lassiter Story [2.14]

Gentleman's Agreement [2.15]

Mike: The Mayor is a man of great vision
Mayor: (Walks out of sauna with steamed up glasses) I can't see

Deaf Man Walking [2.16]

The Marrying Men (1) [2.17]

One Wedding and a Funeral (2) [2.18]

A River Runs Through Me [2.19]

The Pope of Gracie Mansion [2.20]

Bye, Bye, Birdie [2.21]

Carter: (about a giant statue giving the finger) Mike, its huge! Where can we put it?
Mayor: How about my ex-wife's lawn?

The Lady or the Tiger [2.22]

Single White Male [2.23]

The Paul-Bearer [2.24]

Mike: (on delaying the funeral) A couple more hours wouldn't kill her ... again.

Mike: I understand. People are very excited to start mourning.

Mike: Or maybe she was just there to remind us that blowing your hair in the bathtub isn't a good idea

Mike: Well, it's not all bad news.
Paul: How could you say that?
Mike: Well, for starters, it's not all my fault anymore.

Nikki: I am not gonna do that unless he wakes up.
Stuart: Ladies and gentlemen, Nikki's only rule of dating.

Claudia: There was corpse at my wedding!
Stuart: Hey, I know Paul's not an exciting guy...

Father Larry: Now Paul, your vows are to 'love Claudia, and to lose five pounds'?
Paul: Well, I wanted to combine my vows and New Year's resolutions.

Paul: (on Mike taking over) Are you sure this is legal?
Mike: What, are you wearing a wire?

Stuart: (after putting a sandwich in the poor box) What? If they're poor, they're hungry.

Season Three

Dead Dog Talking [3.1]

There's Something About Heidi [3.2]

Mayor: (After looking at a picture of Mike kissing Heidi Klum's butt) This used to be my ass Flaherty.

Mike: (Looking into a toilet) DUDE!

Gone with the Wind [3.3]

Mike: (In a spacesuit, about to have sex with Heidi Klum) One small step for man, one giant... (stares at Heidi's breasts) Oh dear God, thank you. (jumps and floats in bed) The eagle has landed. (Heidi's bra, Mike's underwear, and a packet of condoms floats across the screen) Space is cool.

Stuart: (Looking at a picture of James's aunt Sarah) Wow, she was a cow.
Nikki: Stuart, very nice.
Stuart: I'm serious, she was an actual cow.

[Mike and Carter are trying to shut off a fan in Paul's office]
Carter: Go on without me!
Mike: I'm not leaving you behind!
Carter: You don't have a choice!
Mike: Whatever may occur, I will find you!

Mike: How many cigars equal a dead cow anyway?
Janelle: Twelve.

James: Look at me Mike. I'm twenty-six, I'm single..., and I'm holding the ashes of a dead cow

The Deer Hunter [3.4]

Mike: (slapping Paul on the but) Way to go Paulie.
[Paul walks away]
Mike: It's a lot firmer than you think.

Janelle: Look, do what I do. Picture Stuart as a new puppy. Is it helping.
Stacey: Nope, still trying to hump my leg

[Mike aims and purposefully misses the adult deer]
Nolan: Wow. I didn't even see that one. We don't usually shot babies but that was a hell of a shot. (laughs)

Carter: Mike, shouldn't we wear the oranges?
Mike: Oh, forget the oranges.
[Mike opens the door and a gunshot is heard]
Mike: Let's orange up.

[Mike and Carter have taken the wounded deer to a hospital]
Doctor: what are you doing, that is a deer
Mike: Oh darn, that means I’ve got Ed strapped to the roof of my car

[Filling out patient admission forms at the hospital for the deer]
Carter: Blood type?
Mike: Deer? [off Carter’s look] Deer negative.
Carter: ‘Relationship to patient’ oh that’s easy assassin!
Mike: Listen Carter, I may have shot him, but you ate his mother!

It Happened One Night [3.5]

Three Men and a Little Lady [3.6]

An Officer and a Gentleman [3.7]

Quest for Fire [3.8]

The Kidney's All Right [3.9]

Gobble the Wonder Turkey Saves the Day [3.10]

Local Hero [3.11]

[James is in a Michael Jackson costume and Carter walks in with his costume covered in a coat cover]
Carter: (sees James and tosses his costume to the floor) DAMN IT!

[Stuart is wearing a Bill Clinton mask]
Stuart: (in a Bill Clinton like voice) Deny, deny, deny.

[Mike and Carter are looking for Councilman Pete]
Carter: (in a bunny suit) Mike, hurry up!
Mike: I can't run in this suit!
[Mike runs into a phone booth and changes into a Superman costume]

Monkey Business [3.12]

[Mike is sitting on the Mayor's lap]
Mayor: (in a Santa suit) Well, young man, what do you want for Christmas?
Mike: Uh, my dignity back.

Lloyd and Carter: (together) You're disgusting.
Alfred and Stuart" (together) Bite me.

[Carter is having a dream about the future]
Old Stuart: Long time no see. How old are you now?
Mike: (Looks exactly the same) Eighty-eight.

Later...

Stuart: You know who I can't believe is still alive?
Carter: Who? Ha.
[Camera shows Rags sitting on a chair]

Taxi Driver [3.13]

The Nutty Deputy Mayor [3.14]

Mike: Commisioner Baldwin has spent 14 years developing this toilet. We can't just steal it.
Stuart: Why not?
Mike: Good point. You really change my opinion.

Carter: I don't get this rock-papers-scissor. Why does paper beat rock?
Stuart: It just does!
Mike: Why don't you grab a piece of paper, I get a rock, we'll meet at the playground and then let's see what beats what!

Mike: Why did you do that?
Stuart: Did you not walk up and down in a 300 pound fat-suit?
Mike: Yeah.
Stuart: Then I don't understand the question...

Not in the Line of Fire [3.15]

Internal Affairs [3.16]

Dick Clark's Rockin' Make-Out Party '99 [3.17]

Mike is listing sexual harassment items against Stuart
Mike: Item 10: Inappropriate use of the word "mount". Item 11: Pushing the elevator button without using his hands. (pause) What floor?
Stuart: 3rd
Mike: That's not bad.

Mayor: I complimented Judge Stenciler's mustache today.
Janelle gapes
Mayor: I know... She was not happy.

Janelle is walking in on the Mayor, Paul, and Carter practicing the waltz
Janelle: With the new security cameras, I'll bet some guard is getting a kick out of this.
Guard (sitting in the security cam room): Shake it, fellas. Shake it.

Mike: So - has anybody felt harassed by Stuart?
Paul: Stuart has been publicing naked pictures of me to the internet!
Mike: That's not harassing you, Paul, that's harassing the internet.

Stuart and Diedre is having a fight, after their break-up
Stuart: I slept with your sister!
Dierdre: I was there, you idiot!

Back to the Future IV: Judgment Day [3.18]

Mike: This is like stepping back in time.
Owen: The past is prologue, Michael. Men like us have to keep looking to the future.
Mike: What the hell are you talking about?
Owen: I don't know.

Mike: (reading Owen's list)Things to do: Banish Satan and the forces of Evil; build the New Jerusalem; buy milk...
Owen: Damn! I always forget the milk!

Politically Incorrect [3.19]

That's Entertainment [3.20]

The Last Temptation of Mike [3.21]

Carter & Stuart & Bennett & Deirdre [3.22]

The Mayor With Two Brains [3.23]

Wall Street [3.24]

Klumageddon (1) [3.25]

Klumageddon (2) [3.26]

Season Four

Carter in the Bronx [4.1]

James and the Giant Speech [4.2]

All the Mayor's Men [4.3]

These Shoes Were Made for Cheatin' [4.4]

Rebel Without a Chair [4.5]

The Mayor May Not [4.6]

Scott Crane Show [4.7]

How to Bury a Millionaire [4.8]

The Thanksgiving Show [4.9]

Mike: And remember, don't anybody tell Paul about this 'cause he's got a big mouth!
Paul: Who has a big mouth? Tell me! I wanna know! I wanna tell other people!

The Doorman Always Rings Twice [4.10]

Mustang Mikey [4.11]

My Dinner With Caitlin (a.k.a. Christmas 1999) [4.12]

A Tale of Two Sisters [4.13]

Casino [4.14]

The Marry Caitlin Moore Show [4.15]

Suffragette City [4.16]

Mike's Best Friend's Boyfriend [4.17]

The Pig Whisperer [4.18]

Uneasy Rider [4.19]

About Last Night [4.20]

Don't Get on the Bus [4.21]

Airplane! [4.22]

An American Deputy Mayor in Paris [4.23]

The Commitments [4.24]

Goodbye (1) [4.25]

Dr. Peterson: Mike, are you angry at me, or are you angry at your penis?
Mike: Is that the only class you took in training school?

Goodbye (2) [4.26]

Mike: If you take the fall, then the whole staff goes down with you. This way, only one person gets hurt.
Mayor Winston: But why can't that person be Paul?

Mike: Make sure this Tony guy doesn't think you're still dating him.
Nikki: Fine, I will die alone with 17 cats.

Season Five

Hello Charlie [5.1]

Caitlin:"What's your excuse?"
Charlie:"I have an excuse, but it's really not the time right now"
Caitlin:"Yes it is"
Charlie:"Well, I flew with air Sweden yesterday"
Caitlin:"O, don't tell me, you met some fancy stewardess and ended up going to her hotel"
Charlie:"...."
Caitlin:"O my god"

Charlie:"Stuart, says here you're with the war against pornography"
Stuart:"You're reading that wrong, it's the war against the war against pornography"
Charlie:"I thought that was a typoe"

Caitlin:"Do you remember anything about this woman?"
Charlie:"Ehr..."
Caitlin:"You pig!"
Charlie:"Wait, something's coming"

Smile [5.2]

The Spanish Prisoner [5.3]

Carter:"Stuart, Rags was swept to the street last day and accidentally taken to the pound"
Stuart:"He was found without a leash and than committed a G&B"
Carter:...
Stuart:"Growl and Bite"
Carter:"Come on, you're in charge of this, make a call and set him released"
Stuart:"Can't do that Carter, if I release Rags we have to release that Poodle we napped for a DNR"
Carter:...
Stuart:"Dump -N- Run"

The Bone Collectors [5.4]

Blind Faith [5.5]

Balloons over Broadway [5.6]

Lost and Found [5.7]

All the Wrong Moves [5.8]

Stuart:"Hey Paul, nice suit.... wait a minute, today's the Bagel"
Charlie:"What's the Bagel?"
Stuart:"Every year when Paul asks the mayor for a raise he gives him... the bagel"
Carter:(walks in) "Hey Paul, hey today's the bagel"

Stuart:"How are we going to find a gay guy in here"
Caitlin:"Let me do it, I'll just give him the look, if he doesn't return it, he's gay."
Caitlin:"(gives look to guy, guy looks away), Excuse me, you're gay right?"
Guy:"No"
Caitlin:"Excuse me, but you are"
(Guy walks away)
Caitlin:"'Couple years of therapy, he'll find it out"

The Burgers of Wrath [5.9]

Toy Story [5.10]

The Perfect Dorm [5.11]

Hey Judith [5.12]

The Gambler [5.13]

In the Company of Dudes [5.14]

The Image Maker [5.15]

Trainstopping [5.16]

Rain on My Charades [5.17]

You've Got Male [5.18]

Minor League [5.19]

Science Friction [5.20]

Brotherly Love [5.21]

A Shot in the Dark (1) [5.22]

A Shot in the Dark (2) [5.23]

Season Six

The Arrival (1) [6.1]

A Tree Falls in Manhattan (2) [6.2]

Wife with Mikey [6.3]

The Apartment [6.4]

Yet Another Stakeout [6.5]

Yeah Baby! [6.6]

Sleeping with the Enemy [6.7]

She's Gotta Habit [6.8]

The Wedding Scammer [6.9]

Fight Flub [6.10]

Chinatown [6.11]

O Mother, Where Art Thou? [6.13]

Rags to Riches [6.14]

Sex, Lies and Video Date [6.15]

Eyes Wide Open [6.16]

Age Against the Machine [6.17]

An Affair Not to Remember [6.18]

Let's Give Them Something to Talk About [6.19]

Look Who's Not Talking [6.20]

A Tale of Four Cities [6.21]

A Friend in Need [6.22]

Cast

External links

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