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Tears of a Clooney
American Dad! episode
Francine and Clooney having a moment in their relationship
Episode no. Season 1
Episode 23
Guest stars Paget Brewster, Bruce Boxleitner
Written by Matt McKenna, Chris McKenna
Directed by Brent Woods
Production no. 2AJN04
Original airdate May 14, 2006
Newspaper Headline Rob Schneider, Dead at 62
Season 1 episodes
American Dad - Season 1
May 1, 2005 – May 14, 2006
  1. "Pilot"
  2. "Threat Levels"
  3. "Stan Knows Best"
  4. "Francine's Flashback"
  5. "Roger Codger"
  6. "Homeland Insecurity"
  7. "Deacon Stan, Jesus Man"
  8. "Bullocks to Stan"
  9. "A Smith in the Hand"
  10. "All About Steve"
  11. "Con Heir"
  12. "Stan of Arabia: Part 1"
  13. "Stan of Arabia: Part 2"
  14. "Stannie Get Your Gun"
  15. "Star Trek"
  16. "Not Particularly Desperate Housewife"
  17. "Rough Trade"
  18. "Finances with Wolves"
  19. "It's Good to Be Queen"
  20. "Roger 'n' Me "
  21. "Helping Handis"
  22. "With Friends Like Steve's"
  23. "Tears of a Clooney"

  Season 2
List of American Dad! episodes

"Tears of a Clooney" is the first season finale of the animated series American Dad!. It is possibly the longest episode of the series in terms of fictional time, spanning one year.


On Francine's 39th birthday, she becomes depressed while watching her only TV appearance—a bit part that was interrupted by a young George Clooney, whom she now deeply loathes.

Stan attempts to fulfill Francine's dream of fame by arranging for her to be attacked by a swarm of paparazzi, at the grocery store, but she informs him that her real dream is to destroy Clooney. Her plan is to woo him, win his heart, then break it, and "watch him cry until his eyeballs bleed". Stan thinks her dream is the craziest, most unsettling thing he's ever heard, but he's happy to do it. Stan and Francine fly to Prague, where Clooney is staying for the production of his new movie, Dr. Love. When they get to their hotel, Stan reveals that he has hired mercenaries to gather info on Clooney, which Francine uses to her advantage. They start out with Stan becoming friends with Clooney after sending his other friends on a freighter to China.

Through the course of a year, Clooney meets Francine (who has learned and mastered everything Clooney loves) and falls in love with her. By the next year, Francine has total control over Clooney's heart, but Stan has developed a bromance with Clooney and warns him that Francine is a mother (he shows a picture of his family excluding himself). Now becoming psychotic, Francine plans to kill him if she can't break his heart. To stop her, Stan handcuffs her to a pipe in the hotel room, but she gets free by cutting off her own hand. The two engage in a motorcycle chase to a spa where Clooney is relaxing. Francine beats Stan, who is left hanging from a cliff. Stan asks her what the real reason is behind her hatred of Clooney, and it turns out this is just her way of having a mid-life crisis. Stan talks her out of killing Clooney, and the two head back to the hotel (where Francine's hand has been put on ice to be re-attached). Stan breaks Clooney's heart himself by breaking off their friendship, while a gleeful Francine watches through video cameras hidden in Clooney's room. With Francine finally satisfied, Stan hugs her and wishes her a happy 40th birthday. Even though he pretends to be happy about breaking George's heart, Stan cries when he sees a video of George weeping.

In a side story, while Francine and Stan are in Prague, Roger has the pool drained and filled with soil to grow a vineyard. But because he's too weak to tend it himself, he adopts some foster children and treats them like his slaves. Steve hates having to share his room with them, so Roger has two cute girls be his "personal assistants". Steve and Roger then live a privileged life: growing mutton chops and smoking pipes while the children work in the vineyard. Hayley tries to get Roger to stop treating the children like slaves, but due to being weakened from a disease (which isn't explicitly stated, but is implied to be cancer) can do little to stop him. In the end, she beats the disease and, obeying a promise she made to God (even though it was stated in Roger Codger and Deacon Stan, Jesus Man that Hayley doesn't believe that God exists), is capable of contacting Child Services to save the kids from Roger. Roger lets them go without a fight after he tastes the wine they made and finds it horrible.

Cultural references

  • In the final vineyard scene, Steve's "assistants" wear the slave girl outfit worn by Princess Leia in Return of the Jedi. When the foster children are taken away from them, the girls try to use their chains to strangle Steve in a similar manner to how Leia killed Jabba the Hutt in the same movie.
  • A bumper sticker on Stan's car reads "Cheney-Quayle '08".
  • Francine wears the Bride's yellow jumpsuit from Kill Bill in the motorcycle chase which, in turn, was an homage to the Bruce Lee film Game of Death.
  • The delivery boy tells Hayley that Costco now has doctors in store and later, Hayley gets a phone call from Dr. Kirkland at Costco. Kirkland Signature is Costco's store brand.
  • In the reference to George Clooney ruining Francine's chance at stardom, one of the actors in the scene is Bruce Boxleitner.
  • The title of the episode is a word play of the song "The Tears of a Clown" by Smokey Robinson and the Miracles.
  • The scene where Francine stalks Stan in the dark while she is wearing night vision goggles is from the movie "The Silence of the Lambs"
  • One of the vineyard scenes it seems to be a nod towards Cool Hand Luke as the foster children work in a line with pick-axes in a very similar fashion to a chain-gang with Roger watching over them dressed in attire like the "Man With No Eyes" in Cool Hand Luke. One of the children says to him "Water break boss?". "boss" was the term used by the inmates to refer to the men in charge over them.
  • In one scene Clooney is relaxing in a mud bath listening to Jewel Kilcher's Who Will Save Your Soul on an MP3 player


  • Clooney never actually appeared in any episodes of Scarecrow and Mrs. King, but did make a brief appearance in the American sitcom The Golden Girls.
  • This episode aired fully uncensored in New Zealand on C4 with Francine saying "fucking" and "fucker" in October 2008. The full version also appears on the Region 4 Volume 2 DVD. The Region 2 Volume 2 DVD also contains these words uncensored, but the DVD subtitles read "(bleep)" rather than the actual words.
  • After Francines mopes about her dream of becoming an actress Stan says "I thought your dream was to own a muffin kiosk. Whatever happened to that?" referring to the events of an earlier episode, Finances with Wolves.
  • On Hulu The scene in which Francine uses the word 'fucker' is audibly censored properly, but the English captions replace the curse word and the beep with the word 'bitch'. The word 'fucking' in the same scene is both censored audibly and replaced with "*%$*%" in the captions.

External links

Preceded by
With Friends Like Steve's
American Dad! episodes Followed by
Camp Refoogee

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